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Just got the best surprise in a long time...from an anonymous person. |
Size: 54 Entries
Created: March 23rd, 2010 at 2:00am
Modified: June 15th, 2010 at 11:27am
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Today i woke up on time, but i wasn't feeling like myself. This has been happening a lot lately, i don't know what's going on. I've avoided anything that will make me look at myself and wonder what i have become.today however things turned out different. I decided to check out my writing.com account and there it was...The one thing i have been working for, wanting so bad but it was beyond my reach. I received an upgraded membership from an anonymous person. Maybe for some people its not something big, but come on, i can now set up the blog I have always wanted to. So now no more excuses, no more lying to myself and procrastinating day after day. This is my chance to do something, not for the sake of doing it but because i love it. Welcome everyone, i am so excited just wish you could see my face. This is even better than my CAT results yesterday. This is way above stealing candy from the jar as a kid. That was fun, no doubt about it but its a new beginning that i am ready for (i think). And for what its worth i am really grateful to the person who sent me this. I owe you. Watch this space
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The first song I learned in my high school music class was Fare Thee Well. It might have something to do with the fact that my high school teacher could read minds and knew that given a chance we'd quit the class. This is what we did some few weeks later when we were given the chance to choose our subjects. It's not that music was not fun, it was but we had to do some theoretical lessons before we were allowed to touch the prized instruments. Those were the good times and everything good must come to an end. Today marks the end of a journey I began some few months ago. Looking back to that time I am amazed by how far I have come. If someone had asked me then where I would be three months later, I would have given a different answer. Yet here I am sad at leaving something I have come to love, to accept as part of me and to be proud of. It has been a short journey one I owe to someone who saw something in me and gave me a chance. Have I reached my destination? No but I will and even though it pains me to alight at this stop, it’s a stop I have to take and use it to my advantage. It is just one of the many stops I will have to take as my journey continues. I have no idea where I go from here but I know that when I get there I will know it. My mind may not be conscious of it but I trust my heart to lead me to my destiny. I can not begin to say how this journey has enriched my soul and given me ideas, some of them hidden somewhere in my subconscious just waiting for an opportunity like this to be revealed. Thanks to all who offered me their support by chipping in, giving me ideas n how to improve my blog, urging me to go on especially the bad days when I was so stressed writing was impossible. Without you I wouldn't have made it this far. This goes to all those who believed in me and gave me a chance to prove myself. The day might have come but there's still a lot I have to offer and though my blog will not be available you can still check me out in so many other places. Even if I am gone there are still lots of other writers like me out there. Writers who know they want to write but don't know how to express themselves. People who have talents they are afraid to use, afraid because they have been ridiculed, afraid because they are not the best they can be. They too deserve a chance; they too deserve to be heard. Give them the opportunity to let out their inner voices, to release the star within. |
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It is now a month and counting since the day we were asked to pack our bags and go home for an indefinite period of time. I don't know what angers me the most, the fact that our campus refused to take part in the riots but still got punished or that everyday I still wake up with hope that maybe just maybe this will be the day when we are finally asked to go back. It's pointless, I know and that day might never come anytime soon but its all I've got going for me right now. I have lost all psyche to read and I am so behind on my notes I have no idea where to start but I know I have to keep hoping because without hope I am lost. I am in a hole with no reprieve. So here I am awake three hours after I was supposed to be sleeping. It has beacome a habit and to tell you the truth it is a welcome distraction from what I have become. |
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The past weeks have been pure terror. Don't get me wrong I love being at home and its fun being on holiday when everyone else is at school but it gets pretty boring sometimes. Yesterday I got the news I've been holding out for all along. We report to school on Monday. It crazy I know and I should be happy about it and to some point I am. Now that I have had the chance to really think about it, I will miss home a lot. We have exams coming up so that means sleepless nights of trying to catch up with the rest of the class who no doubt spent their time at home reading. It means having to face up to M who I reconciled with over the break but i don't think am ready to talk to him much less see him. I knew this day would come some day, I had no idea it would be this soon. No worries though I've been through situations harder than this and this is just one of the many challenges I'll get in my way. So bring it on and hey wish me luck those exams are no joke. |
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The flu season is on once again and guess who was its first victim this time..your truly. Yep i am stuck at home with the worst cold in flu history. I could go on ad on about how depressing the sneezing is but i know you have better things to do. The thing i hate most is the fact that medicine doesn't work for me and my mum is too stressed to come to my rescue this time. That means that for the next few days i have to make do with some home remedies before she shows up and decides if my immune system can handle it. I never said this but at home you know you are sick when my mum tells you to go to hospital, all other times she cooks up home remedies from God knows where..from garlic, to chicken soup, to chamomile tea, to remedy you have heard of my mum knows it all and she is not afraid to use it. So i have been ordered to go on lemonade diet until further notice. Wish me luck! |
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I have this habit of staying up till one minute past midnight the eve of my birthday to shout my lungs out and celebrate one more year of living. Its crazy and the neighbours don't appreciate being woken up in the middle of the night but hey, a girl's gotta live her life. Last year as a bit depressing but i got through it and this year is not so much different. Something different though my mum beat everyone else to be the first to wish me a happy birthday. It is a big feat for her considering she has forgotten my previous two birthdays so i am dedicating this day to her. To raising me up to be such a fine woman(ehhh...) and believing in me all through. To say i was a difficult child would be an understatement but if you ask me i would say i turned out all right.
It has become kind of a tradition for my mum to tell me something new about the day i was born. Over the years she has told me pretty much everything i had bet a friend she would run out of details to tell me. I think she was saving the shocker for this year but its OK at least i am still in one piece. Anyway i did mention about me being difficult? yes, according to my mum it started before i was born so i had to be delivered through cesarean. When my mum woke up from the operation she asked to see me, and there i was tiny, beautiful with the coolest hair in the world...and the wrong tag. The nurses confused about what name to tag me since my mum was too tired and medicated to talk had named me Pauline. Its a cool name but come on me.... Pauline? that would be the day. Anyway my mum smiled took me in her arms removed the tag and said, "that's not her name, her name is Cecilia."
So i guess next time you think of calling me a confused person you should blame the nurses who at that early age taught me confusion. Its a beautiful day all the same. I am getting too old to perform my Kwa Zulu dance plus i forgot all the steps from last year so please bear with me. I promise you, God willing at a time like this next year i will give you something good. The cake backfired as usual but i will not let that spoil a good day. Thank you mum for carrying me around all those months. I am sorry for all the trouble i have caused, i guess its in the genes. That's your punishment for loving me too much. I love you always and you are the number one in my life until you get displaced by my future husband. Not that i am getting married but just so you know and be prepared. Its another year of adding to the rising fuel and a year closer to becoming a fossil fuel myself. Hope that when 2100 comes they will know that i saved fuel so they will spare me burning in industries. Have a lovely day. |
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After the heavy downpour yesterday, it was a relief when the sun came out today. Though my back was killing me after sleeping on the couch those warm rays streaming into the room gave me a reason to be up and active and here i am. I still have loads of work to do. My mum has been away for the past few days and i want her to feel welcome when she comes home. She has been going through a rough patch these past few days and the least i can do is make sure she doesn't have to shut at me for not keeping the house in proper from. In case i haven't said it of let, some guys just don't know how to treat a lady. Maybe they were not born on earth but that still is no excuse to hurt someone and expect to get away with it. Thus today is the beginning of project Ignore. The aim of these project is to give a wake up call to all those guys and girls out there who expect everyone else to worship the ground they walk on. I was not brought to this world to act as a doormat or stepping stone to what they think i want or care. I have brain and heart to help me decide that. |
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There's nothing like unfulfilled promises haunting your life everywhere you look. I turn 20 in some few days to come and the more it gets close the more i remember just how many things i was meant to do. Well here i am 20 yrs later, hopes still up that i will get to do some of it if not all before i am too old to remember the dreams i had when i was 16. I have given up on too many things to let this be just another one of those promises we make as kids and throw it out the door just because i am all grown up. I know how much this birthday will mean for someone and even if i am not looking forward to it, i will smile and be happy and give it my best. Sometimes being happy means making those around you happy and giving in to some things we would not normally do. As i get older let this be the one promise i get to keep and at the end i hope that someone maybe might someday do the same for me. |
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the past four days have tested every bit of strength left in me. Its a good thing today was a public holiday i don't know how much was left and if it will get me through. My temper wasn't helping much, it's becoming shorter each day that i don't get the news am expecting. Please remind me when all this is over to never give someone a lecture about reading at home. It is really hard and i never knew it till i tried. Sometime back i'd probably have written off as an excuse some people get to give as a reason for being lazy. In some cases it is in some it is not. So forgive me for everyday i did not give you the latest. Writing on my phone when i am tired and my head is just pounding is not easy. Anyway i have to rush. All my love |
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I have come to accept two things today, one that running from one corner of town to another is not really my thing and two, people who choose walking as a means of exercise have some really great muscles to go with so the rest of us should just stick to the simple sports like sitting on the couch and raising up our feet. No complaints though, at least something good came out of it all: the government thinks i am a thief who's out to rob them blind then skip the country and go and enjoy their money on some island. Tiny problem though, how can i do that when i don't even have an account. They should use that intelligence they claim to have to get some more workers to help them sort out their mail and do their file work properly. At least that way the next time i go they won't claim a letter i delivered personally was never received or in the office at any time. What do they think i am, a patient with secondary amnesia, i can remember what i did or did not do. Wherever that letter went i hope it remains there because if it ever turns up in any of their offices this is one angry client they won't want in their way. |
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I have finally accepted that i am hopeless when it comes to dog talk. Don't be too pleased though, today i said something to Ginger my dog and by the look she gave me i think she heard me. I may not be Dr. Dollitle, but i will get there. Anyway i have had a really gloomy day. My brother is sick and last i saw my dad was when he left on business last week. Hope he comes home soon, i have to admit talking to dogs is not my thing. |
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