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Rated: E · Book · Biographical · #1033101
Many stories are being told about climbing a mountain; this one's about faith.
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         A question often crosses my mind – how do I want to be remembered? I have so many thoughts on this because, simply, it always crosses my mind. But, you know, I try to treat this as imaginations. I will never know. You will never know – that we are being remembered. Do our heroes know that they're being adored and honored?

         Rick Warren said, “You were not put here to be remembered. You were put here to prepare for eternity.”

         Nevertheless, the image of my papa always comes across. He was a simple man with nothing – but everything – to give.

         “Just be happy.”

         Despite the scarcity of things and opportunity, he was happy. And he was misunderstood - by me, my siblings and mama.

         When I was nine or ten years old, old enough to remember those memorable days, he brought me to the center of a mining village. The mine was to us a real blessing, to my boyish mind, it was a gift from heaven above. Dusty road and yellow water, and an English speaking (American) manager, the environment is still inside here. I was proud to hear my papa converse with him.


         We rode in a truck used to transport lumber to our town. It was my first long trip as a child, and I saw the mountain, the rigorous terrain, and the beauty of God’s creation with the backdrop of a yellow water.

         My eldest brother was one of the laborers. At salary time, he’d present to mama his pay slip, a summary of earnings and deductions.

         “Well, my son, better luck next time,” she said with a kiss on his forehead as she stared the contents of the slip. Maybe a few pesos to buy a ganta of rice.

         The innocence of the place could be pictured in my face.

         “What are we doing here, Papa?”

         He couldn’t give me a clear answer. He simply muttered things like he was applying for a job because he was suspended as policeman of our town. The American manager was too kind to accept us, not kind enough to give us a job. And so we walked from that place back to the nearest town, some twenty to twenty five kilometers, maybe more. We trailed a vast wooded area, rivers, up and down, long and winding. An exhaustive, long trek for a ten-year old kid like me. When we reached the first house in town, we asked for food and water. I felt how it was like to be a beggar.

         Mama kept on nagging: study, study, my child, so you can’t inhale the mountain and the color yellow. And now I know why I have to study and strive like what she said. Life is a very difficult subject, more difficult than the trigonometric principles in college. Now I know why the earth moves and revolves like a spinning ball. It’s because life also revolves and spins. Sometimes you are poor, sometimes rich.

         I was called Amerkano because as a young boy, I had those features, genes I inherited from my grandfather who lived in the island, and later left for his good, native land after espousing one of the natives. He left a part of his gene to become a writer like me who struggles to coin words everyday. Now I know why I speak good English.

         A brood of five and all boys was mama’s ticket to heaven; she had her purgatory on earth (to be aggravated by my papa’s drinking). Sometimes, she would just scream in the middle of a peaceful morn. The five brothers didn’t really have peace in the kitchen.

         My vivid memories are focused on the rainy days of my childhood, so full of nature. How happy we would have been if those drops of rain were real manna of the Jews, because the five brothers always longed for them.

         I feel nostalgic when rainy days are here, or drizzles outside the windows come at times. During those wet days, we used banana leaves as umbrellas. And tin cans protected us from pouring rain that flowed like water falls on the holes of our nipa roofs. The cans were hung on the ceilings to catch the water when the rotten nipa leaves could not anymore protect us from the pouring rain.

         High school was full of action, hungry stomach and memorizations. A teacher forced us to memorize history notes, word for word, including periods, commas and question marks. No wonder, she too could do it even with colons and semi-colons. I could memorize long sentences and stanzas of American and Filipino literature. We did it under the shades of coconut and guava trees, reciting facets of world history, word for word, facing the woods at the back of the school. The hollow-blocked fence separating the school and the wilderness looked like a long bridge adorned with young, ambitious "memorizers".

         College? Less thrilling than high school. I copied one whole article from a magazine and had it published in the school organ, with my big by-line. From that time on, I became the writer and future attorney.

         After college, I joined an army purportedly to serve my country, but which later turned out for goons and gold. I took with me some wealth I wanted for a lifelong adventure, forgot everything that was left behind. Slowly, my foundation deteriorated, eaten by rats and mice I kept in my subconscious. All the enigma, excitement and endless dreams and ambitions suddenly, to my mind, became positive. Now here in this world of my own – I can call my own – away from the land of poverty I started to build my dream world. A real one. A fantastic recreation of my childhood dreams full of adventures and escapades.

         How did these all happen? It was just like a dream.

         The earth, seen from above, is a beautiful stone, a mighty rock, thrown by a powerful hand from an ocean of nothingness. It will be there forever. But to be destroyed slowly, and slowly by you and me.

         Haven't you imagined yourself a spirit? You can regard yourself as a spirit floating over the universe, watching at the earth, slowly and slowly deteriorating, until it collapses into nothingness.

         Like a mountain with mines. Like a river with chemicals. Like the air that you breath. Slowly they will go back to the mouth of God.

         WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF GOD SPITS THEM ALL, MAKE ANOTHER BLACK HOLE FULL OF EVIL SPIRITS? CAN YOU IMAGINE? ASK YOURSELF!!!

(This is the introduction - somewhat - to a book about me, of course, and it's like a summary, don't you think? Our life is like an island, there are rivers and seas and mountains, and mines. It has a beginning and an end, and the end seems to be the beginning of another. Don't you think?)

#89. Letting go!
ID #573124 entered on March 11, 2008 at 11:51pm
#88. Fear oh fear!
ID #560266 entered on January 10, 2008 at 11:19pm
#87. Let's shout 'Freedom'!
ID #557144 entered on December 26, 2007 at 5:56am
#86. Christmas, Philippine style
ID #556867 entered on December 24, 2007 at 2:45am
#85. To be great!
ID #554904 entered on December 13, 2007 at 3:33am
#84. This is where you are!
ID #554888 entered on December 13, 2007 at 12:44am
#83. Horsepower
ID #552997 entered on December 2, 2007 at 7:15pm
#82. Fear
ID #551599 entered on November 26, 2007 at 1:33am
#81. Free will
ID #549285 entered on November 15, 2007 at 3:27am
#80. Nanowrimo
ID #546891 entered on November 5, 2007 at 2:38am
#79. The souls I believe
ID #546350 entered on November 3, 2007 at 2:31am
#78. Change
ID #544771 entered on October 26, 2007 at 11:19pm
#77. Onward
ID #542995 entered on October 20, 2007 at 2:12am
#76. A New Day
ID #500473 entered on April 8, 2007 at 9:47pm
#75. The Great Pretender
ID #499032 entered on April 2, 2007 at 3:17am
#74. Anxiety
ID #497034 entered on March 22, 2007 at 11:41pm
#73. Signing Out!
ID #496400 entered on March 20, 2007 at 1:14am
#72. Interdependence
ID #493628 entered on March 9, 2007 at 2:57am
#71. Interdependence
ID #493334 entered on March 8, 2007 at 4:38am
#70. Get to something!
ID #493091 entered on March 7, 2007 at 2:51am
#69. Where to start?
ID #490850 entered on February 26, 2007 at 10:07pm
#68. Busy Line
ID #488555 entered on February 16, 2007 at 9:23pm
#67. Dollars, dollars
ID #477330 entered on December 27, 2006 at 2:57am
#66. My Preferred Size
ID #475824 entered on December 18, 2006 at 2:32am
#65. What is Crazy Writing?
ID #475362 entered on December 15, 2006 at 9:07pm
#64. Merry Christmas
ID #474535 entered on December 11, 2006 at 9:01pm
#63. Pull the trigger!
ID #472469 entered on December 1, 2006 at 9:20pm
#62. Simple thoughts we ignore
ID #472133 entered on November 30, 2006 at 6:04am
#61. To be in a Trauma
ID #472068 entered on November 29, 2006 at 8:55pm
#60. A Writer's Fear
ID #471645 entered on November 27, 2006 at 11:03pm
#59. Start living!
ID #468995 entered on November 14, 2006 at 11:09pm
#58. Death is certain
ID #468763 entered on November 14, 2006 at 2:44am
#57. Stuck, hooked and addicted!
ID #468207 entered on November 12, 2006 at 2:32am
#56. The Database in our Minds
ID #465961 entered on November 2, 2006 at 2:03am
#55. Writer's block
ID #464370 entered on October 25, 2006 at 8:50pm
#54. The Web and My Writing
ID #463744 entered on October 23, 2006 at 2:00am
#53. The Story of Alimohkon
ID #461757 entered on October 14, 2006 at 10:06pm
#52. The bat-like creature
ID #459302 entered on October 5, 2006 at 12:50am
#51. Happy Birthday, MJ!
ID #458209 entered on September 30, 2006 at 6:25am
#50. Thanks WDC
ID #458207 entered on September 30, 2006 at 5:47am
#49. Feeling Dead
ID #458204 entered on September 30, 2006 at 4:53am
#48. Now I know why She Doesn't Love Me Anymore!
ID #454205 entered on September 12, 2006 at 4:12am
#47. Can I do this?
ID #454141 entered on September 11, 2006 at 8:33pm
#46. We don't need to count our blessings
ID #452178 entered on September 2, 2006 at 7:31am
#45. Please forgive me!
ID #451935 entered on September 1, 2006 at 4:53am
#44. The Wedding
ID #449531 entered on August 21, 2006 at 12:43am
#43. Sssttt
ID #447596 entered on August 13, 2006 at 12:06am
#42. Manabanski or Dostoevsky
ID #447179 entered on August 11, 2006 at 2:20am
#41. Cute ha?
ID #445153 entered on August 2, 2006 at 9:10pm
#40. Ordinary Life
ID #444711 entered on August 1, 2006 at 1:10am
#39. A horse-ridden hearse?
ID #442530 entered on August 13, 2006 at 12:14am
#38. deja vu
ID #440475 entered on July 14, 2006 at 3:59am
#37. This is a Challenge!
ID #434758 entered on June 19, 2006 at 9:24pm
#36. THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER
ID #433082 entered on June 13, 2006 at 2:51am
#35. A wound that never heals
ID #433081 entered on June 13, 2006 at 2:48am
#34. Time
ID #430947 entered on June 4, 2006 at 9:34pm
#33. Laughter in Life
ID #428182 entered on May 25, 2006 at 8:16pm
#32. Numb People
ID #427016 entered on May 19, 2006 at 9:49pm
#31. Judging People
ID #427011 entered on May 19, 2006 at 9:17pm
#30. When is Writing Too Easy?
ID #424879 entered on May 10, 2006 at 3:12am
#29. Mortals
ID #422923 entered on May 1, 2006 at 9:40pm
#28. Unattached
ID #421342 entered on April 23, 2006 at 9:01pm
#27. Eternity
ID #420629 entered on April 20, 2006 at 9:31am
#26. Drought
ID #418108 entered on April 7, 2006 at 10:45pm
#25. Reminders
ID #417953 entered on April 7, 2006 at 3:37am
#24. Success is here!
ID #413977 entered on March 19, 2006 at 8:10pm
#23. Nearing success?
ID #413975 entered on March 19, 2006 at 8:03pm
#22. In the middle of...
ID #410954 entered on March 5, 2006 at 10:08am
#21. A few more days
ID #410952 entered on March 5, 2006 at 9:54am
#20. Undated
ID #410951 entered on March 5, 2006 at 9:51am
#19. Painful Paralysis
ID #410950 entered on March 5, 2006 at 9:44am
#18. The End of the Philippines?
ID #408779 entered on February 23, 2006 at 11:25pm
#17. Gather the Seeds
ID #408533 entered on February 22, 2006 at 6:45pm
#16. Discipline
ID #401410 entered on February 15, 2006 at 12:44am
#15. changed bioblock
ID #398512 entered on January 11, 2006 at 12:51am
#14. Murderous Lollipop
ID #397648 entered on January 7, 2006 at 11:35pm
#13. Christmas is Tiring Too!
ID #396353 entered on January 2, 2006 at 11:29pm
#12. Painful Years Now a Merry Christmas
ID #394834 entered on December 26, 2005 at 10:05pm
#11. The Way Life Should Be
ID #392366 entered on December 13, 2005 at 6:00pm
#10. BYE BYE WRITING DOT COM
ID #392258 entered on December 13, 2005 at 3:40am
#9. My Father's Fantasy
ID #390242 entered on December 3, 2005 at 9:17pm
#8. More Mountains
ID #389617 entered on December 1, 2005 at 2:33am
#7. Perspiring getting up the Mountain
ID #389616 entered on December 1, 2005 at 2:21am
#6. stupidity
ID #388447 entered on November 26, 2005 at 12:37am
#5. Ordinary thought
ID #388081 entered on November 24, 2005 at 1:57am
#4. Computer guns
ID #387274 entered on November 19, 2005 at 11:05pm
#3. Dejavu?
ID #386804 entered on November 18, 2005 at 12:54am
#2. Forever Mountains
ID #386222 entered on November 15, 2005 at 3:42am
#1. The seas and the fields
ID #386221 entered on November 15, 2005 at 3:27am

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