Life through my Eyes

Mixed Emotions for 2020

This has been a year and a half rolled up into one gigantic year filled with mixed emotions. I am trying to stay positive, but I do have to rant some today. I can't help it. I had some very painful news last night, and I can't help but feel like it could have been prevented.

I lost two extraordinary people in my life last night due to covid. I hate that word with a passion and cringe every time I use it. I also found out that six more of my church family has it; they are in their 60's and 70's. At the same time, other church members have been in quartine for the last two weeks. I love these people very much and pray that they all get better. This isn't even counting my WdC family, who has been tested positive for it as well.

I know that most of them have taken precautions in protecting themselves against this thing. I have tried everything to protect myself and pray that I don't fall to this virus. I had been sick this past week myself, but I was run down, and like an idiot, I drove 5 hours with my side windows down for Fable, who later I found out the reason why she was so hot. I'm very blessed that I didn't get it, and it was only the flu.

Why is it so hard for others to wear the dang mask? I know I'm taking your right away to do what you want to do! But, if you don't follow the guidelines, it could cost you your life or someone you love, maybe even like.

It causes me pain to say that you are a selfish person then. Not, to follow the guidelines in preventing this not to spread more than it should. Only selfish people think about themselves first and not others. I don't particularly like wearing them either, but I do because I have to take all precautions due to not having an immune system that works properly. I tried explaining it to one lady last week she brushed me off. I wanted to bop her across the back of the head, a Gibbs slap. She had no concern for me or anyone else except for herself—such disrespect for others' welfare.

Maybe I'm too selfish myself wanting to protect other's welfare and my own that I didn't consider what it was doing to her. Maybe she has anxiety about wearing it, I do too, but I also have more anxiety if I don't wear one—the flip side of the coin, you might say. I get hot in them and panic thinking I can't breathe in it. But, I know that if I take it off, I will get sick.

I went out to eat a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving and forgot to take my mask. The place was empty, up to our last 10 minutes there. It became packed with people. The tables were only two feet apart. I ended up with the flu. It is the last place I will eat out at until this virus is gone. I love being alive too much, and it isn't worth me dying over a piece of fried catfish.

So, you tell me, is it worth knowing that someone you care for dies from you not protecting yourself for them or even protecting yourself to live for them? My friends left many loved ones behind, and I know that they wore masks and done other protective measures to protect themselves and others from getting this virus. But, they did get it from somewhere or someone they came in contact with.

I pray that we all make it through this winter season without losing anymore loved ones to this virus.

Remember to MASK UP and SANITIZE before coming in contact with others. Do what my daughter Kala does every time she goes out and comes home. She would shower and change her clothes before hugging me. My son Eric said that's their normal routine now. No one hugs until they are sanitized. I love them both so much they consistently worried about me while I was there. Setting good examples for their daughters and others who they care about, even total strangers.

I have had too many emotions this year, from sad to joyous to devastation—a few happy moments in between all of this mayhem. I can't help but think that not everyone could have such a bad year with things going upside down and crazy things happening that would've never happened normally. I know that it has been challenging for everyone, and I pray that we will get through this together and with lots of prayers.

Take care of yourselves and your family this winter season, and remember, I love you.

Yours truly, LegendaryMasK