Porthole

Speech is an Act

I'm stealing from hullabaloo22 :

‘Harsh words break no bones,
fine words butter no parsnips.’

Speech is an Act

Not... "A speech act is an utterance that serves a function in communication. We perform speech acts when we offer an apology, greeting, request, complaint, invitation, compliment, or refusal."

Rather: speech is not merely words. Speech is a verbal weapon that can heal or hurt. It can encourage or discourage others to heal and hurt.

Harsh words break no bones...

But they can kill. "J'accuse" has lead to many a head rolling. It is naïve to think that one isn't guilty until proven... that is a legal nicety. People condemn just based on accusations. Real harm results. It's why I'm death on fake news and mere pointing fingers. I've been on the receiving end.

Some people handle accusations better than I do. I'm HSP (highly sensitive) so I bruise easily. It's not the only reason why I was traumatized, but it's an important one. Harsh words can break people. Far worse than they hurt me. It can easily lead to suicide or homicide. Bullying is real.

Fine words butter no parsnips...

I prefer my parsnips roasted. But... I'll take butter... in my coffee, on my potatoes, if it's Amish rolled butter... as is... or on bread. However, if we are talking crushed pineapple no nice words will matter. *yuck*

I do believe that compliments are important. It doesn't hurt anyone to be truly nice. But... if the words are false they can doubly harm. Honesty is a virtue (so is tact).

A speech act is an utterance that serves a function in communication. We perform speech acts when we offer an apology, greeting, request, complaint, invitation, compliment, or refusal.

Which brings up the speech act. These can matter too. A genuine apology may not change reality but it might take away the sting. A simple No! may be most appropriate at times. Refusing another persons attempt to hold a conversation may be rude in some cultures but it sets an important boundary when necessary.

In conclusion. Try to be truthful. Try to be kind.

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