First Blog Entry Feb 14/19

Long Pause Before This Entry.... Wow

I can’t believe it’s been four months since I last posted.....
I’ve had so many deaths around me.... friends, family, the last being my step-father, the only man that had been a father in my life. I’m going to miss him most.
I’ve had three fathers in my life. My adopted father died when I was three years old. When I turned 18 I met my birth father... but didn’t give him the time of day until I was pregnant at 25. I gave birth in December, and buried my father in March, on his birthday. My step-father, I met him when I turned 18. He was married to my birth mother. He was awesome! He was a police officer and a very funny man. We built a relationship pretty quickly. He was the father he didn’t have to be and I loved him so much for it. It didn’t matter that I was no longer a child, he knew I still needed him in my life. I could never repay that debt. A couple days ago, we went up to celebrate his life on his birthday. He’s been gone a month now, but the hurt is still raw. I know he’s finally at peace, and no longer in pain, but my heart hurts so much knowing he is gone.

Now I’m back home, and for the last two days I’ve been sick... headaches, sore stomach.... today I’m finally starting to feel like me.

I am blessed to have had him in my life for as long as I did. I am so thankful he came into my life and shared his with me. His children accept me as their own and I love them and thank them for sharing the great man that was their father with me.

I’m going to close this post for now.... the letters are blurry lol.

Have a great weekend.