Blindfaller

Hey Stranger

Loretta watched the pedestrians walk from shop to shop, the early summer day bathed them in pristine sunlight. She grabbed a crumpled napkin from the console of her car to wipe her sweaty hands as she tried to calm her nerves. After all, it wasn't every day that a person had the opportunity that life had given her. She hoped she didn't mess it up, that she'd know the perfect things to say.

At the large shop windows, she pretended to admire a fifties era cocktail dress while she tried to see the cashier or any employees. Nothing. She'd have to go inside. The problem was, she wasn't sure she'd recognize Brett after all those years. He most certainly wouldn't know her.

Loretta said a silent prayer as she pushed the door open and stepped inside. She took note of the store name and smiled. "Home Again Secondhand Shop." Maybe it was a good omen.

“Can I help you?” A dark-haired man who appeared to be in his early thirties greeted her with a smile. He was abnormally short for a man and had certain traits that reminded Loretta of a man she hadn’t heard from in over thirty years.

Loretta smiled back and studied his kind face. She had rehearsed what she’d say, but now her mind fumbled for just the right words. It wasn’t every day that a mom found her long lost son.

“Brett?” Her voice sounded foreign, shaky and timid.

“Yes, that’s me. Do I know you?”

“No, I’m sure you wouldn’t. This is a nice shop.” Loretta pretended to study a Singer sewing machine in a treadle cabinet.

“Thank you.” Brett dusted off the area around the cash register while keeping a suspicious eye on her.

Loretta glanced around to make sure they were alone and then cleared her throat. She picked up a ceramic turtle and toyed with it. “Do you remember me at all?”

Brett stopped and stared at her. “Should I?”

She fumbled with the turtle, and set it on the counter. She might as well buy something while she was there.

“No, it was a long time ago. You were so young.”

Brett tapped some numbers into the register and read out a price. She could feel his discomfort as tangible and sharp as the sword on display behind the counter.

“So, where should I know you from?”

Now that the moment had come, she felt faint. There was too much at stake. She counted out a few bills and placed them on the counter. With one final crumb of bravery, she studied his face.

“I’m your mother.”

His lips formed the tightest line of a smile as he handed her the turtle in a plastic bag.

“I think you’re a little late.” His eyes grew hard. Loretta could almost see the painful memories that flashed through his mind. The shopping mall that day so long ago. He was so little. She could hear him crying because he couldn’t find her. And she walked away. A tear sprung to her eyes, but she didn’t wipe it away.

“I’m sorry for what I did.”

“I’m not. You left me so a real mother could raise me. I suppose I should thank you.” His voice came out flat, almost sarcastic.

“Yes, I know. I spent years trying to find you. They changed your last name, and you moved away, and—”

“I’m sorry, did you expect me to still be waiting for you at the toy store at the mall?” Brett lowered his voice, as a new customer came into the shop. “Why did you look for me?”

Loretta rummaged through her purse and pulled out the thick envelope. It held all the answers. She’d written her entire story for him. The rape, the poverty, and drug abuse, the stress of raising a child whose face was painful to look at. She pushed the envelope across the counter to him.

“Read this. I just wanted you to know everything. And I hoped…I don’t know what I hoped. I just—”

Loretta walked away and headed for the door.

“Wait.”

She stopped but didn’t turn around.

“It’s not that I hate you or anything. It's just...you're a stranger. I already have a mom, you know?”

Loretta nodded, tears blurred her vision as she left the shop and headed back to her car.

She drove away from the little shop and headed out of downtown. She had a long drive home; had driven two hours to meet her son in Twin Falls. As she drove across the Perrine Bridge to get back on the interstate, she noticed a group of base jumpers standing on the viewing platform. Dark thoughts sprung to mind and she pulled off into the little parking area to watch.

Loretta locked her car and headed to the viewing platform to see the brave jumpers in action. The bridge rails on both sides were lined with yellow ribbons that fluttered in the slight breeze for some cause or another.

Loretta grasped the rail as she walked the footpath. The cars that rumbled by beside her made the whole thing shake and sway. She wondered how the jumpers could stand it. She just arrived and already her heart pounded. She gasped as she walked past the canyon rim and the ground plunged way down to a thin line of blue river as it squiggled away to unknown lands beyond the twists and turns of the snake river canyon.

Down below there appeared to be a park in a little grassy area beside the river. She couldn’t explain why, but she felt the river pulling her in, drawing her down to the beauty of that little grassy area with the kite fliers and children scrambling about on playground equipment.

She returned to her car, and turned around, crossing back over the bridge. She knew there must be a road down into the canyon. To the right, a visitor’s center, and there just beyond it, a road that wound down into the canyon. She marveled at the roadside waterfalls and beautiful views as she dropped lower and lower. Soon, she found herself in the parking lot of Centennial Park and slid into a spot. She could hear the children giggling and chasing each other around the park. In the distance, boats cruised down the river, and she could see a lone base jumper pull his parachute and glide down on the other side of the water.

If she were honest with herself, she’d know that the first thing that pulled her to the magnificent bridge was not the jumpers, but the idea of jumping, plunging into the deep blue water as the sunlight sprinkled glitter across the river. To be free from guilt and sorrow. From her place, she could see the tiny yellow ribbons that fluttered from the rail of the bridge. They looked cheerful and bright.

Something tugged on her shirt, jerking her out of her thoughts. She spun around and faced a grimy little girl, her eyes round and scared. “’Cuse me, do you know where Papa is? He was over there, but he dis’peared.” The girl burst into tears, her face a grimy display of dirt, tears and sticky bits of candy.

Loretta stooped down and held the girl’s hand. “I’ll help you, Sweetie. Let’s go find your Papa.” She had no idea if she were looking for a father or grandfather, but she walked the child around the park and hoped she’d recognize her relative.

After five minutes, Loretta began to silently panic, wondering if Papa would be found at all.

“There! Papa There!” The girl tugged hard on her hand and pointed toward the bathrooms. An older man had just walked out, rubbing his hands on his pant legs. He headed straight for the swing set, and then swung his head around in all directions, panic evident on his face.

Loretta escorted the child to the frightened grandfather. “I believe this is yours?”

He sighed and relaxed. A smile graced his pleasant features. “Thank you so much. Her father would have killed me if I lost her!” He hugged the child and focused his attention back to Loretta. Their eyes met and lingered. There was kindness and experience in his gentle eyes.

“How can I repay you?” He didn’t wait for an answer. He scooped the child into his arms and squeezed her nose in a playful show of affection. “Should we take this nice lady for a cup of coffee and ice cream for you?”

The child squealed her approval, and Loretta wasn’t a stranger anymore.
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1435 Words

Hey stranger
There's danger down the line
You'll find heartache and trouble
And all your good time
Rowdy ways
I'll tell you no lie
There's no burden greater in life
As soon as you pick yourself up just to say
Hey to your loved ones
Who'll all turn away
Don't go living with trouble in mind
There's no burden greater in life
Hey stranger
If ever you decide
Giving in to the bottom will ease your weary mind
And heavy heart
You'll see in time
There's no burden greater in life
As soon as you pick yourself up just to go
Home to your loved ones
You'll find a locked door
Don't go making mistakes like mine
There's no burden greater in life
Don't go living with trouble in mind
There's no burden greater in life