Hey, life? Are you kidding me?

Obviously, I'm a Super Human Slacker

I'm such a slacker (today, anyway) that I'm too lazy to reach over to the remote to change the channel from this show that is stupid but yet still making me feel like a grand champion life slacker.

This is a sort of game show called Super Human. Don't think for an instance it is anything like American Ninja Warrior - that shit rocks. Just to give you the lame scale on this show. . . Mike Tyson is one of the judges. Apparently, you can still have a career after biting someone's ear off. I have never even heard of the two other judges, but that's not saying much. . .because, I'm a slacker even in staying up to date on has-been celebrities.

This 'contestant' on there right now has the Super Human power of naming frogs and toads by only hearing their croak or ribbit. I'm not saying it's not impressive (to some people), but I'd almost rather be a Super Human slacker. I do have 2 uvulas - that could be my Super Human power. I guess I have wrongly been calling it a freak factor of these years - because, yes I'm a slacker.

OMG! The frog dude just made it to the final 3. And Tyson just said 'yo' at least 4 times in one sentence fragment.

Somebody turn the television off for me. . . Please.

Fine, I will reach the 6 inches and do it myself. It might kill me though because I have a sugar headache and I can't find my essential oil headache oil. Sure, I could just give up sugar. But I'm slacker not a quitter.

Ladies (pretending there are some reading this), what do you take off first when you get home - shoes or bra? I only ask because it varies with me which makes me feel like I can't even commit to comfort. But right now, at this moment, I'm too much of a slacker to ponder it.

I wonder if the frog master eats frog legs. Maybe he imitates their 'call' and lures them to his lair.

Definitely, need to quit thinking tonight. . . or start.


Uvulas R Us,
Branson (Audra)

P.S. The dogs are getting cat food tonight because slackers don't carry a bag of dog food in from the car at 9:14 p.m.