Sandy Supposes....

Christmas-Calorie Remorse

PROMPT: Tell us about a time you purchased something you really wanted and couldn't wait to have, but soon regretted.

         So, today's blogger topic is buyer's remorse... Technically, no money exchanged hands when I married my spouse 'cause my parents generously footed the bill for the festivities, they did not believe in bribes, and some would think I came with a dowry. In reality, they threw me a thank-God-you're-leaving-home party, so my hubby didn't see any profit from our nuptials. What I'm saying in a convoluted manner is neither my partner, nor I purchased the other, and so logically, there can be no buyer's remorse. As far as I'm aware, there were no warranties either, applied or otherwise. After almost thirty-nine years exasperating each other, I think we're in it for the long haul, no lasting regrets.

         Several different houses in varying towns have been bought over the years. Regrettably, we never resided any where long enough to rue our choices. When we sought change, we moved.

         The same could be said of my vehicles. For most of this marital contract, Number 1 husband has operated an autobody shop. He restored and repaired all manner of transportation options with wheels. Anything I drove was up for sale, and eventually would be sold out from under me. I had no time to grieve regret my cars, trucks, vans, or SUVs.

         He once traded his services to a customer who paid with a water bed. Hubby really wanted one, and in his mind he got what he wished for without forking out hard-earned money. The initial set-up took time and effort. New sheets had to be purchased for it. Water had to be pumped in, and then permitted to heat before we could try it. Long story short, hubby and his spine found the new bed uncomfortable. If he wanted to sleep, he stretched out on the bedroom floor. Moi, very pregnant with Future-Super-Child Number 3, loved it. It was a free flow variety which meant there were always waves rolling in, or the tide cresting if someone so much as breathed, coughed, or sneezed. I imagined I was floating on a gently swaying boat. The current two kids treated it as a trampoline. The only thing I regretted about this bed o' water was the extra effort it took to disassemble and then re-assemble it every time we re-located. During a winter move, the mattress would freeze.

         Does food with calories qualify under this prompt? Perhaps I've regretted succumbing to a passing whim, a fleeting fancy. Who hasn't purchased post-Christmas cookies? The price was attractive, a discount. I'd assuage any murmurs of self-argument such as I really didn't need it, I bake my own cookies, the biscuits are probably stale, and it wasn't much of a bargain since they were over-priced to begin with. Yes, I admit the cute tin snowman packaging was a lure, but what I really couldn't resist were the delectable shortbreads nestled within... Cookies are the gifts that keep on giving...

         Moan, calories and their companions weight gain, are the ultimate buyer's remorse. They stick around. They cling. They refuse to budge.

         Christmas-Calorie Remorse

         Christmas calories lay lurking all 'round the house

         stuffed into each nook and cranny, ready to pounce.

         They sweet-talked my will power, urged it to denounce

         the wiggle, the jiggle of my broadening bounce. .... anyway, it's a work in progress...