Just Be There Blog

Four

July 24, 2016 at 12:03am

Disillusionment.

That's all I have to say at this time...Later, the seed planted will evoke growth. But tonight, all I have is the one word.


4:15pm
Okay I am back, sixteen hours later Hmmm. maybe I shouldn't laugh so hard, with my track record, lately, it could have been 14 days later

So there is that word; evoke the condition so common. In my case, the coming of age has found many paths taken which seem to have dwindled into nothingness. Expectations over the years, some not so grand and some beyond realistic promise, have met the same unfulfilled fate.

I have learned not to depend on anyone for the little things which turn out to be all important in my life. What joy I've experienced, I've had a hand in creating for myself. The same goes for the misery, as well. This is true for everyone, you know.

Friday, in a moment of preoccupied absent mindedness, I set my glasses down on a shelf at the market to look at the fine print of a package. I'm near sighted, you see. Then I performed my label reading down the isle. In the meantime, I left my glasses on the shelf. A few minutes later, I chose the item that promised the best for the money I was spending and walked away to finish up my shopping. You guessed it, I left my glasses on the shelf. Not only did I forget them for a moment but I checked out and walked out of the store with my bag in hand before I realized I'd left my glasses on the shelf. When I returned to where I knew I placed my glasses, they were gone. I went to the customer service and asked if any one had returned a pair of prescription sun glasses to the lost and found, and no one had. So I waited around the store for about an hour and no sign of my glasses. I left the store discouraged that someone would pick up a pair of prescription glasses which they obviously couldn't wear and not turn them in to the lost and found. Why pick them up at all?

Disillusionment in action. The glasses aren't that important, they are easily replaced with the right amount of money. And this particular prescription needed renewed several years ago. I think what bothers me about all this is if I had come across something so personal that wasn't mine, I'd have taken them to the lost and found. I suppose not everyone is like me in that respect. Friday night I tried to accept the lesson of the day as Karma in action. I'm sure I have picked up something that wasn't mine and when I couldn't use it, just thrown it in the trash rather than be bothered with them...though, I can't remember when I could have done something like that. I did a lot of selfish unthinking things in my younger years, things I don't remember now. I've not always been a conscientious person. I've not always thought about somebody else feelings and this could be the moment for me to reflect on that. Or it could have absolutely nothing to do with "what goes around, comes around." Maybe, it is simply the time for me to reap the disadvantage to my frequent moments of absent mindedness. This time I wasn't at home when I put my glasses down, I was in a public place.

The funny thing, I rarely wear my glasses at home. I wear them for driving. I don't wear them at work, or to read (obviously), or even to work on the computer. I do wear them to watch television, if I don't wish to sit up close to it that is. The majority of my living is not wearing my glasses. But I should, without a doubt, wear them if I intend to drive...ho hum.