The Treatment Program of Absurdity: 1

The Desired Prank Phone Call

I was sitting around in the waiting room of the OPO, talking with Monica. I had recently made a mistake of knocking over Jared’s chocolate milk, while reaching for some cherries in the refrigerator. Lily had come into the OPO, and had brought the incident up to everyone, in which she made up lies about how I never cleaned it up; Monica asked Lily to quit antagonizing me. Dr. Steed came out to get Lily, and bring her to her office for therapy. I noticed Lily’s butt crack was showing, and shouted, “LILY, PULL YOUR PANTS UP;” Monica and George were laughing hysterically, while Dr. Steed went up to me, and exclaimed, “IS THAT SOCIALLY APPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR, YOUNG MAN?”
That night, George told me, again, about the previous Harry who grabbed Lily’s tits; My first thought of the incident was, “Of all of the girls to pick from, WHY LILY? I was told about the rest of the incidents with the previous Harry: The incidents included Harry flirting with the female staff; grabbing the boobs of the girl at ONCC; and how finally got kicked out for shoplifting. I went on a rant about how Lily should be flattered that anyone would touch her tits; I had figured that no baby would even want to be breastfed by those things. Because of how much I loathed that walrus, I thought of maybe using the fact that this was the only guy in her life, who ever loved her.
I came up with the ultimate plan of prank calling Lily, pretending to be the other Harry, asking her out on a date. Rick over heard them smirking and decided to listen in. Rick heard the plan, in which he went into disgust, and threatened to have me terminated form the program, on the condition that he went along with the prank phone call.
The next day, there was a group activity hosted by Dr. Gore in the music room, upstairs in the top floor of the OPO. Because of the prank phone call I wanted to make, Dr. Gore no longer trusted me to work with other students; and when I brought up the phone call, he had me escorted out of the room. After threatening me with termination if I didn’t stop talking, he asked me to come to his office.
“Frank, don’t you want to hear my side of the story?”
“NO, I DON’T GIVE A f*** WHY YOU WANTED TO DO IT.”
“But, she insulted me.”
“IT DOESN’T MATTER, THAT IS NO EXCUSE FOR WHAT YOU WANTED TO DO TO HER.”
Dr. Butler knocked and entered the room.
“Dr. Butler, how do you feel about the prank phone call I wanted to make?
“I wanted to kill you when I heard about that prank phone call.”
“It was just a joke.”
“SHUT UP!”
“If you do not want to go to a hotel tonight, you need to promise that you will not make that prank phone call.”
“Fine, I won’t. Oh, Dr. Butler, when you said that you wanted to kill me, did you actually mean it?”
“You bet your ass I did.”