"21"

Don't You Remember

Sarah pulled away from Rich, “Don’t.  You need to go.  And I need to move on.  Just go.  And don’t call anymore."

“Come on, Sarah.  You break it off this time, and there will not be a fourth time.  My heart can’t take this back and forth.”

“Just go.”  Sarah would not look into those blue eyes.  If she looked, she would prevaricate again.  Rich was nice, probably the sweetest man she would ever meet, and she did love him, if only he were not so  broke all the time.  The lifestyle she wanted to live, the people she wanted to associate with, that required a certain income level and Richard had no interest in being the type of man who could meet Sarah’s lifestyle needs.

Sarah closed the door behind Rich and caught her image in the mirror by the door.  Without being conceited, Sarah saw herself as beautiful. She could do so much better than Richard.  Long dark hair, parted in the middle, sultry brown eyes, and a body that drew attention from men and women.  Rich had a hard body and knew how to wear a pair of jeans, and he was gorgeous.  If only he had a job that paid a decent wage.  He was not stupid, but he did not have an interest in using the brain cells that he had for a job that paid him what he was worth.  She loved his sense of humor and the way she felt when he would slide in behind her and just hold her.  She admonished the image in the mirror, “Sarah, girl, stop it.  You will find somebody that can give you what you need.”  Sarah saw the lie in her eyes.  “Don’t worry.  If things don’t work out with Morgan, Richard will always take you back.  He always does.”  She half smiled at the image in the mirror, adjusted her pose, moved her hair ever so slightly – yes, even sad, she would draw attention.  Morgan would be putty.  She put herself on a 4-month clock to either have a ring or dump Morgan. 

***
Sarah sobbed into her pillow.  She gave everything to Morgan for the past four months and he dumped her for some dimwitted daughter of a Power 500 member.  When Sarah ran out of tears, she pushed herself off her stomach and onto her back, half coughing and sniffled to catch her breath.  She stared at the ceiling fan and then let her gazed drift down to the windows by her bedside where she caught her reflection in the glass.  She looked awful.  Her eyes were swollen, her nose was red. She tugged at her hair to try to push it into place, and that’s when she noticed that night had fallen.  She had been crying for several hours and she was exhausted.  She closed her eyes for just a minute.

Sarah awoke the next morning to the sun shining in her face.  Although she wanted to shut the curtains on the mid-morning sun, she chose not to.  She moved her attention to the table lamp and slowly put it together that she had fallen asleep with the lights on.  The small vanity mirror on the bedside table showed a sleepy face, no longer carrying the signs of deep crying.  Sarah liked looking at herself in the morning.  “Hey, beautiful, you screwed it up pretty good this time, didn’t you?”

As she stretched herself into wakefulness, she then realized she was still in her street clothes and tennis shoes.  Before the tears could start again, she bolted to the bathroom to get cleaned up. 

Before long, Sarah stood in front of her closet wrapped in a towel and a turban towel controlling her long dark locks.  She crabbed a sundress and threw it on the bed and then dug through her dresser drawers to find appropriate undergarments.  She threw the choices on the bed with the sundress and wandered to the windows to look down into the street traffic seven floors below.  She was lucky her father helped with rent, otherwise she would not have this unobstructed view of the downtown metro skyline five miles away.  The city lights were so pretty at night and the heat and haze generated by the city were only noticeable during the hustle of the work weeks.

Sarah dressed quickly and then made a quick call to Tiffany.  “Hey, Tiff, I need to get away from the city today.  You up for anything?” 

“Sure.  What do you have in mind?”

“I don’t know.  I heard Jim has a boat that he is going to put in the water somewhere in Princeton.”
“How many guys and how many girls?”

“What difference does it make?”

“I know about Morgan and I don’t like to be around you when you are hunting.”

Sarah could not help herself, and the lightness of her laughter spilled out.  “Okay, okay.  Point taken.  He said I could only come if I brought a plus one female.  You up for boating?  I think Jim had you in mind when he put in his invitation.  Besides I don’t feel like hunting just yet, you know?”

“Yeah, I know.  Give me 15 minutes to get ready and I will be right over.”

Sarah had at least half an hour.  It might be worth a shot.  She had second thought with each number punched in the phone, even up to the answer on the other end.  “Hi, Rich.  It’s me, Sarah.  How are you?”

Rich truly sounded happy to hear from her.  That’s what she thought until she asked him to go on the boat ride.

She could hear the indecision in his voice when he said he had to think about it.  What did he have to think about?

“I’ll call you in about an hour or so when we get up to Princeton.  Will that be enough time to check your schedule?  -- I’m sorry.  That sounded really mean.  I just want to see you again.  I’ll call you back when we get to Princeton.  Is that okay?”

"Why are you calling me if you and Morgan have plans?”

“You know about him?”

“Yes.  Who else would be in your ‘we’?”

“Morgan and I aren’t together anymore.  I’m spending the day with Tiffany.  I just thought you would want to go boating with some fun people.”

“Let me think about it.”

****

Sarah grabbed a beer and took a long draw before making the phone call to Rich.  “Hey, honey.  You said you needed time to think.  I’m wearing that blue sundress you like so well.  Come over to the marina in Princeton.  Jim will be launching soon, but we can wait until you get here.”

“About that, I’m not coming.”

“I’ll apologize.”  Sarah could not stand herself when she groveled.

“Thank you, but I can’t.  You do this all the time, Sarah.  You don’t remember anything about me.  I did what you asked.  I kept my distance so you could be free.  You only want to be around me when it’s convenient and when you are between boyfriends.  It’s not happening like that anymore.  I met this girl last month and I think she’s the one.  I mean really the one and I don’t want to screw that up.”

“Are you serious?”

“I am serious.  I saw her at a barbeque and told my friends I was going to marry her.  She and I have been seeing each other a lot and I know she is the one.  I’m not going to screw this up.  Please stop calling.”

“All right.  I wish you all the best.  Truthfully, I do.  I’m not just saying that.  I really mean it.”

“Thanks.  Good luck.”

And that was it.  Sarah disconnected from the call.  The last 24 hours were flipping awful and did not promise to get better.  Sarah took another long drawl from the beer and let out a belch that reverberated across the park, well maybe not that far, it was just funny to see the little kids stop in their playground romp to stare in her direction.

“Nice tone quality, Sarah.”

“Thank you.  And how do you know my name?”

“I asked.”

Sarah held out a hand, “And you are?”

He accepted her handshake.  “Skip Brewer.”  Noting that Sarah scrunched up her nose, he added, “It’s better than Burl, is it not?”

“Yes, Skip, yes, it is.”

She heard Jim calling, “Hey, you two, let’s go!”

Since she still had his hand, she flashed him a brilliant smile and tug him into running down to the boat launch with her. 

[word count:1439]


******
When will I see you again?
You left with no goodbye, not a single word was said
No final kiss to seal anything
I had no idea of the state we were in
I know I have a fickle heart and a bitterness
And a wandering eye, and a heaviness in my head
But don't you remember, don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby please remember me once more
When was the last time you thought of me?
Or have you completely erased me from your memories?
I often think about where I went wrong
The more I do, the less I know
But I know I have a fickle heart and a bitterness
And a wandering eye, and a heaviness in my head
But don't you remember, don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before,
Baby please remember me once more
Oh, I gave you the space so you could breathe
I kept my distance so you would be free,
In hope that you find the missing piece
To bring you back to me
Why don't you remember, don't you remember?
The reason you loved me before
Baby please remember me once more
When will I see you again?