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Rated: 13+ · Book · Action/Adventure · #2021930
The battle between Muslim vampire hunters and Volpone, the vampire
#836107 added December 13, 2014 at 3:23pm
Restrictions: None
Chapter 13
Scene 12

Lights up

On stage is Mcdougal. He has a claymore sword.He battles vampires. He kills the vampires.

Enter Aleister from the left.

Mcdougal: Aha! The jinni tha possessed my good friend's body!

Aleister: Actually Scotsman it is Aleister La Gey. You may have cut off my head but with my satanic maghicks I managed to survive! fkevkevkeveueueku!

Mcdougal shouts in pain.

Mcdougal: Wha the heck? This feeling? Are you controlling me?

Aleister: Yes I am. When I bit you, I infected you with my will. The magic has been coursing through your body ever since then. As you can see I am using it.

Mcdougal shouts in pain.

Aleister: Jinnis! Oh mighty jinnis possess this Scotsman and make him my slave!

Screams are heard.

Mcdougall shouts in agony and is possessed.

Mcdougal-Bune: I am Bune! What manner of clothing are these? I am wearing a skirt yet am possessing a gentleman?


Aleister: That is a Kilt my good friend. Now fight the fellow that shall be arriving here soon.

Aleister leaves stage to the right.

Enter Max from left.

Max( To Bune): Mcdougal! Where is La Gey!?

Bune attacks Max.

Bune: Musa sapientum fixa est!

Max shouts in pain and falls to the floor.

Bune: I am Bune! Slayer of Mohammedians! Cleanser of all that is decent and lover of destruction!

Enter Hakim from the right.

Hakim says out Surah 113.

Bune bleeds from his nose.

Bune( To Hakim): You wretched creature! I shall finish you off next time Muslim! See you later suckers!

Bune runs off-stage to the left.

Hakim( To Max) Are you okay? What happened with the jinni that looked like Gwynfor?

Max: Its not a jinni, its no illusion, its Aleister La Gey, he used magic to take over Gwynfor's body.

Hakim: Damn! I didn't know that he would have been able to do that! I see that Mcdougal has been possessed! Let's get out of here! Can you walk?

Max: No, I can't feel my legs man! I have no energy at all I-

Max loses consciousness.

Hakim picks Max up and they leave stage to the left.

Lights down

Scene 13

Lights up

On stage is Wrath. He looks heavily injured.

Wrath: That Mohammedian put up a fine battle! I have not had a good fight like that for a while! Oh the joy!

Enter Aamil running from the right. Aamil has a hammer. Aamil hits Wrath over the head with it. Wrath is killed.

Aamil drops the hammer on the floor.

Enter Hakim and Max from the left. Hakim is carrying Max who is unconscious.

Hakim: Aamil!

Aamil: Hakim! I think I just killed Wrath. Something happened to him.

Hakim: I had a fight with him. He was a tough devil. I pushed him off the balcony after he nearly smashed my head in.

Astarte( Off-stage to the right): Aamil! Aamil where are you! Where are you honey bunny!

Aamil( To Hakim): Get the heck out of here right now!

Hakim( To Aamil): Everyone thought you were possessed or dead so you are coming back with me brother.

Aamil: The time ain't right. Get out of here before she arrives! We wouldn't stand a chance. Astarte is a witch and a vampire so get out of here now!

Hakim: I'll come back for you, I promise!

Hakim leaves stage to the left

Aamil goes over to Wrath and pretends to be trying to help Wrath.

Enter Astarte from the right

She sees Wrath dead on the ground.

Astarte: What happened to Wrath!

Astarte looks extremely worried.

Aamil: It was Hakim! He did it with this hammer! I fought Hakim off but I was too late to save poor Wrath.

Astarte: He must not leave here! He must not leave here! If he leaves then he'll tell his friends that Wrath is dead!

Aamil: We'll have to move quick. Those dastardly Mohammedians must be dealt with!

Aamil and Astarte leave stage quickly to the left.

Lights down

Scene 14

Lights up

On stage is Ruqqayya, Lust and Gluttony.

Ruqqayya( To Lust): There are too many satanists patrolling near the hidden route! We cannot escape.

Gluttony( To Ruqqayya): Why we not kill them?

Lust( to gluttony): There are too many of them around hon.

Ruqqayya's phone rings.

Ruqqayya quickly answers the phone.

Ruqqayya( To phone): I cannot hear you! What are you saying Hakim!? Wrath? Wrath is dead?! I'm not doing that! You there? Damn!

Ruqqayya( To Lust and Gluttony): Wrath is dead. Hakim just told me before the phone stopped working.

Gluttony( To Lust): Oh how sad. Wrath grumpy but he nice to me.

Lust( To Gluttony): He had to die. He would have never left Volpone.

Gluttony: Me know but me still sad.

Lust: Of course sugar. We knew him for so long.

Ruqqayya: Hakim told me that I should kill you but I won't do that. I won't kill you even if it helps take down Volpone.

Lust( To Ruqqayya): Why not? You have been fighting him for years now.

Ruqqayya( To Lust): I know you better now Lust. You don't usually show it but there is a lot of hurt in you and a lot of good. And you Gluttony, I know you are learning but you are getting better and even if you have committed grave sins you did it under bad teachings.

Gluttony( To Ruqqayya): I like Ruqqayya. Maybe I Muslim one day.

Ruqqayya( To Gluttony): It would be better if you take your shahada now since we might not make it.

Lust( To Ruqqayya): I'm sure we'll be fine.

Gluttony: There is no god but Allah, and Muhammad is the messenger and servant of Allah, la ilaha illa-llah, muhammadun rasulu llah

Lust looks surprised at Gluttony. Ruqqayya looks in joy.

Ruqqayya( To Gluttony): Good on you sister! You can start a new life now.

Gluttony( To Ruqqayya): Me like that very much! I happy to go to pray when we survive this.

Ruqqayya: Good girl.( To Lust): And you?

Lust( To Ruqqayya): I can't.

Ruqqayya: You should since if you die now you will die as a kuffar and not as a Muslim which will be bad for your after life.

Lust: I know but I just can't. Sorry.

Ruqqayya: Okay, we need to get out of here. This is what I suggest. ( To Both): I will distract the devils and you make for the escape route. It is hidden behind that yew tree and there is a trap door there.

Gluttony: No, I go.

Lust( to Gluttony): What are you on about!?

Ruqqayya( To Gluttony): This is no time for heroics!

Gluttony( To Ruqqayya): You know route so you get there quicker and lead Lust away from here. They not likely to kill me since I important to stay alive. If I captured they let me live, if you captured they kill you and Lust not muslim so her soul in bad state if she die by accident.

Gluttony runs off stage to left.

Lust( To Gluttony): Gluttony!

Lust is about to run after Gluttony but Ruqqaya holds her back.

Ruqqayya: We must move to the escape route now. Gluttony actually spoke a lot of sense then. You cannot be captured so let's move. Gluttony will be fine in sha Allah. let's go! Watch where the jinnis are going now!

Gluttony( Off-stage): You bad tasting satanists! You unable to catch me you bad flavored meat! If you burger you give me diarrhea!

Satanists( Off-stage): That's Gluttony! Get her!

Ruqqayya( looking): Okay! I see them leaving.

Lust(Sadly): I hope they don't hurt her.

Ruqqayya: Okay! They've left! Let's go!

Lights down

Scene 15

Lights up

On stage is Gluttony. Gluttony is looking up to the left. She turns around to face the witches.

Enter three bearded witches. One of the witch carries a hand that has been cut off from a Muslim.

Witch 1( To Gluttony whilst placing out hand as a bait): You are trapped.Come on now. You come back home with us and we'll give you this hand. You like Muslim flesh don't you?

Gluttony( To Witches): Human flesh haram! So I not eat man flesh anymore! I only eat halal!

Gluttony takes out a gun.

Witch 2( To Witches): I'll use me magic to capture her!

Witch 1( To Witches): Wait! Use your magic and it could kill her!

Witch 3( To Witches): I'll just wound her arm hrfiiji-

Gluttony shoots Witch 3 in the chest. Witch 3 dies. Gluttony has blood spray out of her arms.

Gluttony drops the gun. She then runs at Witch 2 and bites her on the neck. Witch 2 dies.

Witch 1( Panicked to Gluttony): Damn it! Damn it! hjddijdkjfkjjsj!

Gluttony screams in pain and falls to the floor. Blood sprays out of Gluttony's chest.

Gluttony picks up the gun and shoots Witch 1. Witch 1 dies.

Gluttony: I in pain! Bad witches! Bad witches! Try capture me!

Gluttony tries standing up but cannot.

Gluttony: Me hope Lust and Ruqqayya okay. They good. They help me, they friends......( drowsy) nice to have friends.... me go to mosque with Lust and Ruqqayya.... Me happy........

Gluttony closes her eyes. Gluttony dies.

Lights down

Scene 16

Lights up

On stage is Ruqqayya and Lust.

Ruqqayya: Okay, the trap door is about here!( Ruqqayya opens trapdoor): Let's get out of here!

Enter Wizard Fist from left with monsters. Fist has a sword. he holds the sword to Ruqqayya's neck.

Fist( To Ruqqayya): Hello brah!

Ruqqayya spits at Fist.

Lust( To Fist): How?

Fist( To Lust): Saw the others run off after Gluttony but I ain't after Gluttony, I'm after you baby! What luck that I was real close by hidden eh brah?

Ruqqayya( To Lust): Run!

Fist( To Lust): You run and she dies.

Ruqqayya( To Fist): You coward!

Fist(To Ruqqayya): Never said I was brave. ( To monsters): Grab her!

Monsters grab Lust.

Lights down

Scene 17

Lights up

On stage is Volpone looking worried. He is surrounded by Jinnis and vampires.

Enter Fist, monsters with Ruqqayya and Lust. Ruqqayya has been blindfolded and gagged. Monsters carry weapons.

Volpone( In joy to Lust): Aha! You have finally been captured you devilish woman of mine! How dare you run off with Mohammedians like this you syphilis loving wench!

Lust spits at Volpone.

Volpone slaps Lust across the face.

Volpone( To his servants): leave here and kill the rest of the Mohammedians left.( to Fist): You stay here as well as your monsters you wonderful wizard!

Lust: There is no god but Allah and Muhammad is the messenger and servant of Allah, la ilaha illa-llah, muhammadun rasulu llah

Volpone looks amused.

Volpone: The audacity of you! Just like the slut that you are! Run off with others and disrespect your previous master! You believe that will make me free you Lust? Foolish, foolish Lust! I shall lock you in a room and there you shall remain!

Lust( To Volpone): At least Gluttony is still alive! She got away and she's a Muslim as well. That must hurt you, that one of your closest servants is no longer yours and belongs to the Muslims!

Volpone: Actually, Gluttony is dead.( To right) Bring her in!

Enter Vampire from right carrying Gluttony's body.

Lust sobs.

Volpone( To Lust): She was found surrounded by dead witches. Seems that the witches made a right mess of things. She died because of your foolishness! Wrath and you shall be protected! I will not die! ( To Vampire) I suppose you can keep her as food after we are done here!

Lust: Food? food! You low life! How could you! She killed so many for you! She served your interests for so long and that is how you repay her you scumbag!?

Volpone: Yes, but betrayal makes one a Judas. Her Judas actions make her nothing but vampire food.

Lust:

In the name of Allah Most Gracious Most Merciful.
1 Say: I seek refuge with the Lord of the Dawn
2 From the mischief of created things
3 From the mischief of Darkness as it overspreads
4 From the mischief of those who practice Secret Arts
5 And from the mischief of the envious one as he practices envy.

Volpone laughs.

Volpone: You believe that will make any difference!? You have barely become a Mohammedian!

Blood pours out of Volpone's eyes.

Monsters howl in pain.

Fist shouts in agony.

Lust grabs a sword from a monster. Ruqqayya is freed. Ruqqayya takes off the blindfold and gag.

Ruqqayya( To Lust): Let's go!

Lust( To Ruqqayya): No, we finish this now!

Volpone( to Lust): how exactly do you intend to end this whore!? I cannot be killed!

Lust( To Volpone): Like this.

Lust places the sword she is holding to her neck.

Ruqqayya( To Lust) What are-

Volpone: You are mad! utterly mad and insane!

Lust: Get your men out of here or I'll slit my throat right now! And leave Gluttony here!

Volpone( To his servants): leave here now!

Volpone's servants leave. Gluttony's body is left behind.

Ruqqayya( To Lust): don't do this!

Lust( To Ruqqayya): I have read that suicide is not islamic, Ruqqayya. I have read the Quran and hadiths but this is not suicide. This is me dying so that Volpone dies.

Volpone( To Lust): You are insane! The Mohammedians have made you lose your marbles!

Lust( To Volpone): Wrath is dead.

Volpone: What?

Lust: Pride, Envy, Wrath, Sloth, Gluttony, Greed and I. You used us all. We were all normal before Abaddon and Hecate captured us all and put your essence into us. I will end this now.

Lust stabs herself in the chest.

Ruqqayya: No!

Volpone looks pained. He places his hands on his chest.

Volpone goes on his knees.

Volpone: Damn you! Damn you! I cannot die! I cannot! I am immortal! I am immortal!

Volpone sobs.

Volpone: I cannot die! I don't want to! Please!

Lust( To Volpone): Have some dignity will you ( To Ruqqayya): I... I'm glad you forgave me for all the bad things i did.

Ruqqayya( Crying To Lust): They don't matter anymore! You are a Muslimah! Your sins are gone!

Volpone( To Lust)jhfjdjddjjk!

Lust( To Volpone): It is too late to use your magic to heal me.

Lust( To Ruqqayya): I'm... I'm glad we could be friends. Shame... Shame about your ancestors recipes though.... I don't think I.... I don't have the... energy..to tell you the ingredients that.... I... stole...I hope... I get... to ... see... Joe.... Oh Joe.

Lust dies

Volpone: Nooo! Damn it! Damn! That idiot! That whore! I'm vulnerable because of her!

Ruqqayya pulls out the sword from Lust's body.

Ruqqayya: She died so that I could finally finish you.

Volpone: I'll give you power! Anything you want! Please! I-I cannot feel my magic! I'm harmless now!

Ruqqayya: I do this for everyone you ever hurt, I do this for every person you murdered, crippled, humiliated and for everyone's lives you destroyed. I do this for Lust and Gluttony, especially those two since you taught them wrongly. Your evil ends now Kuffar!

Ruqqayya attacks Volpone with the sword. She stabs Volpone through the neck. Ruqqayya slits his throat.Volpone dies.

Ruqqayya: You kuffar! You devil! They didn't deserve what you did to them! You took away any normal life they could have had! You deserve to die!

Ruqqayya looks at Volpone's dead body.

Ruqqayya then approaches Lust's body and holds her. Ruqqayya sobs whilst holding Lust in her arms.

Lights down

End of Act 3






















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