Alamin: Desires and Redemption

Chapter 3

Act 1

Scene 1

Lights up.

Enter vampire from the left. He is heavily injured and has blood over him. He wears modern clothing.

Enter Ruqayya. She is in burka and carries a baseball bat. The Burka has been adapted for running. Trainers can be seen.

Ruqayya( To Vampire): Filthy kuffar!

Ruqayya runs at the Vampire and smacks him on the back.

Vampire falls to the floor in a howl of pain.

Enter Max. He wears modern clothing.

Max( To Ruqayya): good one sis!

Enter Hakim. He wears modern clothing.

Vampire( To everyone): Please! Let me go! Please!

Max( to Hakim and Ruqayya): Ha! Look at the little vampire on the floor! Boo hoo!

Hakim runs at the vampire and kicks it.

Hakim( To vampire ): I love beating vampires!

Ruqqaya( to Hakim): Oh darling! Can we kill it!? I want to practice my swings!

Ruqayya swings her bat threateningly at the vampire.

Vampire( To Ruqayya): No! No!

Ruqayya , Hakim and Max laugh.

Ruqayya( To Vampire): You want to play baseball don't you? I'll be the bats woman and you'll be the ball! That'll be fun I think!

Enter Gwynfor. He is covered in blood and is wearing a business suit.

Gwynfor( To Ruqqaya): Stop tormenting the kuffar!

Ruqqaya stops tormenting the vampire.

Gwynfor walks up to the vampire.

Gwynfor( To Vampire): Hey there. I'm Gwynfor.

Vampire( To Gwynfor): Y-you just killed my friends!

Ruqqaya( To Vampire): Only because they attacked us first you bloodsucking scumbag!

Gwynfor( To Ruqayya): Quiet! If you don't behave i'll take that bat away from you!

Ruqqaya( To Gwynfor): I'll behave! I love the bat so don't take it away from me!

Gwynfor takes out chocolate from his pocket and gives the chocolate to the vampire.

The vampire takes the chocolate and hungrily opens the packet then eats it.

Gwynfor( To vampire): Okay boyo, this is very simple now. Yes, I did kill your friends and we will be killing you. We need an answer. Where is the sorcerer hiding?

Vampire( To Gwynfor): I'll never tell you!

Gwynfor( To Ruqayya): Do what you do best.

Ruqqaya smacks the vampire in the leg with the bat. The vampire screams in pain.

Gwynfor grabs the vampire by the collar.

Gwynfor( to Vampire): You are doing your blue best to make me angry! Like a famous character would say: You don't wanna make me angry! Though I'm scarier than the green boyo since he would smack you to death in one blow. I won't do that. I'll be nice and slow. I'll put you in a room and like a lobster being boiled alive I'll make you go nuttier than a bagful of nuts. By the time I’m finished with you, if you don't tell me where the sorceror is, you will end up in a pool of your own excrement wanting to die. You see that nice lady with the bat? She likes using it. Do you want her to hit you again?

Vampire( To Gwynfor): No! No! please no!

Gwynfor( To Vampire): tell me then where he is!

Vampire: he-he's down by the abandoned harbour. He is over there! Thats where they sacrifice to Moloch!

Gwynfor: Thank you. As the french say: Adios!

Gwynfor moves away from the vampire

The Vampire runs. Ruqqaya laughs in glee and chases after the vampire.

She smacks the Vampire on the head, blood splatters all over the ground.

Max( To Hakim): Is it adios the french say?

Hakim( To Max): No, adios is spanish.

Gwynfor( To Hakim): Its spanish? I always wanted to learn french, never got around to it, will do it after all this.

Hakim( To Gwynfor): Are you still going on about that crap?

Ruqqaya( To Gwynfor): What are you going to do if you are not fighting vampires?

Gwynfor( To Ruqayya): Well, I'm thinking of opening a Kebab and Cawl restaurant.

Hakim( To Gwynfor): Kebab and cawl!

Gwynfor( To Hakim): People like cawl and they like kebab, so why not sell both?

Max( To Gwynfor): We're gonna miss you man!

Ruqqayya( To Hakim): What is Cawl anyway?

Hakim( To Ruqqaya): Oh it’s just some Welsh soup.

Gwynfor( To Hakim): Just a soup! Just soup! Oh boyo! ( To Ruqqayya) Cawl is the national dish of my country. It’s the best soup on the planet! ( looks into the distance in nostalgia) my father was a owner of a soup making factory. His soup was wonderful! ( To everyone) I'll take you all to a meal after we deal with this sorceror!

Everyone: In sha Allah!

Lights down.
Scene 2

Lights on

On stage are five hideous and bearded witches who have a cauldron. Steven is standing besides a table which has a woman on it who is tied up and unconsious. Steven wears priest clothing and a helmet that has goat horns on it.

Steven( chanting): I the son of Volpone call upon Moloch's might! I use my maghicks and blasphemous sorcerous dark soul to give thee energy oh might Moloch! O potens Moloch, Sacrificium tibi virgo? Talem multo me O! I give this girl to you oh mighty king!

Steven takes out a ceremonial knife from his robes.

Steven chants satanic words.

Witches: Sacrifice! Sacrifice! For Moloch! Moloch shall give us power!

Sounds of gunfire can be heard.

Enter Witch 6 from the left.

Witch 6: Its the exorcists! Their here! Oh no!

Enter Hakim from the left. He has an axe.

Hakim( To witch 6): die infidel!

Hakim strikes witch 6. Witch 6 dies.

Steven( To Hakim): You again!

Enter Max.

Max( To Steven): And I, you sorceror! Surrender!

Steven( To Max): never!

Enter Gwynfor and Ruqqaya. Gwynfor carries a machine gun.

Gwynfor( To Steven and Witches): Alright people! Surrender and give us the girl and we'll let you live. Give her to us and we exorcists will walk the other way and you leave. Good enough for you?

Steven( To Witches): Attack!

Steven stabs the tied up woman in the chest and kills her.

Gwynfor( To Steven and witches): Have a taste of Islam you punks!

Gwynfor fires at the witches and Steven. Witches die.

Gwynfor runs up at Steven and grabs him by the collar.

Gwynfor hits Steven.

Gwynfor( To Steven): You evil son of a bitch! Why'd you kill her! Why! You could have lived you kuffar!

screams are heard.

Hakim( To Ruqqayya): do you hear that?

Ruqayya( To Hakim): yes. What the? Didn't we just kill them?

Max( to everyone): What's going on?

Steven laughs.

Gwynfor( To steven): What's funny!?

Steven( To Gwynfor): You and your friends are dead! You idiot! This whole building is Moloch's temple! Everyone you killed empowered Moloch and I just killed the girl, meaning that he will arrive! Your dead meat! I'll have my revenge you muslim sand niggers! ( Steven dies)


Ruqqayya screams

Max mouth bleeds.

Hakim vomits onto the floor.

Gwynfor( To everyone): Its happening! He's coming! Prepare yourselves.

More frightening screams are heard. Smoke appears to the left. Enter Moloch from the left. Moloch is a frightening monstrous figure with sharp claws and horns and red skin.

Moloch(To everyone): I AM MOLOCH! BOW TO ME OR I SHALL EAT YOUR SOUL!

Gwynfor shoots at Moloch. Gwynfor screams in pain and drops the gun.

Gwynfor( to muslims): drat! Say the surahs brothers and sister! Say it!

All the Muslims:

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most merciful
Say: I seek refuge with the Lord of the Dawn
From the mischief of created things;
From the mischief of Darkness as it overspreads;
From the mischief of those who practise secret arts;
And from the mischief of the envious one as he practises envy.

( Max screams and falls to the floor unconscious)
( Ruqayya screams in agony and has a seizure)
( Hakim bleeds from his mouth)

Moloch( In pain and screaming): AHHHHH! It HURTS! IT HURTS YOU HAIRLESS MONKEYS! AHHHH! GORIHORTASFORGO!

Moloch points his finger at Gwynfor. Gwynfor screams in agony and blood pours out of his mouth.

Gwynfor( To Moloch): You kuffar punk! ( To Hakim) Say the final surah!

Hakim and Gwynfor:

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Say: I seek refuge with the Lord and Cherisher of Mankind,
The King (or Ruler) of Mankind,
The Allah (or judge) of Mankind,-
From the mischief of the Whisperer (of Evil), who withdraws (after his whisper),-
(The same) who whispers into the hearts of Mankind,-
Among Jinns and among men.

( Hakim falls to the floor shouting. He places his hands on his head and rolls on the floor)
( Gwynfor's shouts in agony and his intenstines fall out of his belly)

Gwynfor( As he holds intestines in to Moloch): I'll have you for supper!

Moloch falls to the ground on his knees.

Moloch( To Gwynfor): Ah! Those words are so painful! You maggots will pay for this! I'll wear your skins and use your bones to make human soup!

Gwynfor: Don't you ever speak to me about soup, you devil! I'm the master of soup making!

Moloch and Gwynfor struggle in battle.

Moloch stabs Gwynfor in the eye with a claw. Gwynfor's eye is pulled out.

Gwynfor punches Moloch. Moloch falls back. Gwynfor wraps an intestine around Moloch and chokes him.

Gwynfor( as he chokes Moloch): Allahu akbar boyo!

Moloch dies.

Gwynfor falls back.

Hakim stops rolling around.

Hakim looks around and sees Gwynfor on the ground. He runs to Gwynfor and holds him.

Hakim( To Gwynfor): Oh damn! Oh! ( Hakim takes out mobile phone from pocket and tries typing in a number) Damn! Its not working!

Hakim takes out Gwynfor's phone.

Hakim(To himself): Damn it!

Gwynfor( To Hakim): No point phoning. The devil's energy destroyed the phones. ( Gwynfor coughs up blood)

Hakim( To Gwynfor): Oh God! I'll take you to the car man!

Gwynfor: Aye, ( tries lifting himself up. Hakim helps him. They slowly move to the right of the stage)

Gwynfor: I'm thin-thinking of calling my restaurant Jihad kebab.

Hakim: That won't go down well with people man.

Gwynfor: My tagline will be Have a taste of jihad soup, it'll blow away your tastebuds!

Hakim: You've got a very dark humour.

Gwynfor laughs.

Gwynfor: I want some cawl. I love cawl. My mother always made me one on my birthday. I'd eat it all up and lick the bowl. Leeks, potatoes, swedes, carrots and lamb. I'll take you lot out after I get better. Ah! I love cawl!

Gwynfor dies.

Hakim: Yeah, well you just think of getting to the car man. ( Noticing Gwynfor not moving) Gwyn? Gwynfor? Gwynfor!

Ruqayya awakens.

Ruqayya( To Hakim): Hakim? What happened? What's wrong with gwynfor? Oh! Wh-what's that hanging out of him!?

Hakim( To Ruqayya): He-He's dead.

Lights down.

Scene 3

Lights up.

On stage is Beng and Bile. Beng is human and is in normal clothing. Bile is a monster. Bile is green skinned.

Beng( To Bile): Dude! We gotta stop the fighting! We are losing the war! They killed Moloch last night!

Bile( To Beng): Yes! But what will your sister do?

Beng: I don't give a damn what she wants. I'm sad that Steven is dead but now ain't the time for revenge! Now is the time for a treaty dawg! If we go on like this we'll will lose out and ma sista will gain more power. With father soon awakening I must be the one chosen as his successor not her.

Bile: we make peace then what?

Beng: We make sure that Astarte ain't chosen and when I become the next Vampire King and I'll kill those exorcists!

Bile: Oh yes! Yes! I will enjoy such a thing!

Enter Abaddon from the right. He is in pyjama's and is looking gloomy.

Beng( To Abaddon): Abaddon!

Abaddon( To Beng and Bile): Hello there you two. Bad day today.

Bile( To Abaddon): Why's that yer sinfulness?

Abaddon ( To Bile): Ah, It's Moloch. He and I had good times together. We corrupted imams together and had people sacrifice to us.

Beng:( To Abaddon): Abaddon, dude, do you agree with us ma homie?

Abaddon( To Beng): Yes, I agree, make peace with those Muslim scum then work at stopping your sister gain the upper hand. Then your father will choose you and you will be his successor.

Beng: Yes! Yes! ( To Bile): Let's go Bile! We got a peace treaty to do!

Bile and Beng leave to the left.

Abaddon: empires rise and fall, factions battle for supremacy and the mighty fall and become weak whilst the weak become strong. Sic itur ad astra!

Lights down

Scene 4

Lights up.

On stage is Astarte. She wears satanic priestess clothing and is holding a skull.

Astarte( To the skull): Oh Steve! Oh you poor brother of mine! Oh! How I grieve for you! Your Moloch and my Asmodeus in unison! How we had a goal to corrupt the world together! Oh! ( in rage) I shall kill those muslims! That Gwynfor will pay! I'll invade and ruin the muslims! I'll burn their Qurans and eat the flesh of their imams. I'll hunt you down Gwynfor! I'll kill your all friends! I'll destroy Ruqqayyya and her dear husband Hakim! I'll have jinnis posses you! Oh how I'll eat the sheik's liver and use it for maghicks! My dear brother you will be avenged! I shall avenge you with devilish might.

Enter Abaddon from the left. He is in pyjamas.

Abaddon: Hello there!

Astarte: What do you want you foul smelling damned one!?
Abaddonl: Hey, were all damned here sweet cheeks. I came here for a visit.

Astarte: You want tea? The only tea I make is out of the liquids from muslim blood!

Abaddon: Yeah, I am not that interested in eating humans to be honest with you. Never liked the taste, I always preferred a good corruption to simple brutality.

Astarte runs up to Abaddon and grabs him.

Astarte: Asmodeus will have you for dinner if you do not get to the point you stinking devil!

Abaddon laughs.

Abaddon : Calm down your wickedness! Okay, okay, I'll get to the point me lovie! Beng.

Astarte moves away from Abaddon.

Astarte: What is that fool of an unlikable brother up to now?

Abaddon: He's going to make peace with the Muslims.

Astarte screams in rage and has a tantrum.

Astarte( As she flails around like a lunatic): Treason! Treason! Treason! How dare he! I'll kill him! I'll eat his brain and use his carcass to keep unholy books! I hate him! He was always my least favourite brother! When is this meeting!?

Abaddon: It's tonight. At the Hope Hopeful Hotel.

Astatrte: Hope Hopeful? Ah! That hotel that is used for meetings between us and them as neutral ground. Hmmm! No more neutrality there shall be!

Abaddon leaves stage to the left.

Astarte: I call upon thee oh great lusty Asmodeus! Give me power! I ask thee for thou spirit to invade me!

Horrifying screams are heard. Smoke appears. Devilish shadows appear. Jinnis enter and leave the stage.

Enter bearded witches and warlocks.

Witch 1( To Astarte): I shall serve thee oh mighty sinner! My master Asmodeus sent me here to serve thee!

Withches( To Astarte): serve ye we shall! Serve ye in sin!

Warlocks( To Astarte): We are warlocks! Receive our magicks!

Enter Necromancer.

Necromancer ( To Astarte): My necromancy shall bring the dead to life and you shall have muslim zombies as thou slaves!

Astarte( To all): Yes! Yes! My great master Asmodeus! We shall conquer! We shall maim and bring destruction to purity! Hail Asmodeus!

( All): All hail Asmodeus, leader of lust!

Lights down

Scene 5

Lights up.

On stage is Sheik Ali. He sits at a seat. Ali is an old man and wears a turban. Opposite him is Beng who is sitting on a seat.

Ali: So, Mr Beng, you are telling me that you wish for a peace treaty.... I see... I see. Six months is it now?

Beng: yeah dawg! We gotta have peace and love and that dawg!

Ali: Young man, do not lie to me. You wish for peace to concentrate on dealing with your devilish sister.

Beng: How'd ya know about that ya sket!? How'd you find out?

Ali: I have my methods.

Beng: Damn! You have spies in the organization.

Ali: Or quite possibly it is simply obvious. You and your sister have been working separately for a while now with captured satanists stating that you have fallen out. Power struggles have always existed. I remember many years ago, when two witch covens went to war with each other. Quite a nasty case that was indeed.

Beng: So what do ya say homeboy?

Ali: Well, as a Muslim I am a lover of peace and thus will agree to this treaty to not go to war with your faction. You pay the one million pounds and return muslim prisoners to us and we will commit to this treaty.

Beng: Knew you'd see reason dude!

Ali: Six months it is. Goodbye.

Lights down.

Scene 6

Lights up

On stage is Beng and Bile with jinnis.

Bile: We did it Beng! We can now concentrate on your sister.

Beng: yeah dawg! We attack soon! Gather all the forces! We attack tonight! Tonight the streets will run with the blood of my sister's jinnis!

Jinnis( all at once): All hail Beng! May we spread sin in thou name!

Vile demoniac screams are heard.

Jinni 1 ( To jinni 2): What is that?

Beng( To Bile): Strange, very strange.

Bile( In realization): Damn! It must be Astarte!

Beng( To Bile): She must have known! But how!?

Bile ( to jinnis): Prepare yourselves you devils!

Enter from the right bearded witches and warlocks.

Witch 1: Abracadabra!

A Jinni dies after spraying blood from his chest.

Beng( To jinnis): Kill them all!

Jinnis battle witches and warlocks.

Horrifying spells are cast against each other as the foul creatures battle. Jinnis and witches have malevant wounds upon their bodies.

Beng( To a warlock): Sarakunologdtyuoi!

Warlock screams on the floor and runs off stage to the right. blood sprays from the right. All witches and warlocks die. Three jinnis are left standing as well as Bile.

Beng( To Astarte): show yourself ya chicken!

Enter Astarte from the right. She carries Steve's skull. Enter warlocks, witches, jinnis and necromancer.

Necromancer( To Astarte): Let I kill him your satanicness!

Witch( To Astarte): Let me! Let me! Me beard wants to be dyed with their blood!

Bile( To Witch and necromancer): I'll feast on your bones!

Astarte( To witch and necromancer): No! I shall deal with my brother!( To Beng) how about it!? You think your maghicks can defeat mine!

Beng( To Astarte): Never! I'll kill you and eat you dawg!

Astarte: I'll make a seat out of your bones and feed you to my witches!

Beng: I call upon evil homies of Astaroth to destroy Astarte the hoe!

cruel screams are heard.

Astarte: Asmodeus! Asmodeus! I call upon thee!

Witches and warlocks howl like animals.

Beng points at Astarte

Beng: Abracadabracabooom!

Astarte laughs.

Astarte: You should try better than that you mongrel! Gatroloollololohgrdg!

Astarte points at Beng.

Blood pours out of Beng's mouth.

Beng concentrates.

Beng: Astaroth! Astaroth!

Astarte's mouth bleeds. She spits out the blood.

Astarte takes out a knife.

Astarte: Deredrawafihynohitohtresdgf

Beng starts moving towards Astarte.

Beng stops moving and screams in pain. He drops to his knees.

Beng: traeddedghthh!

Astarte screams in pain and blood pours out of her eye.

Astarte: You filthy mutt! I've only recently put make-up on! grtrfhffhtgthjh! Marwydiawl!

Beng howls in pain. Astarte runs at him and stabs him. Beng dies.

Witches and warlocks howl in joy and charge at Bile and the three jinnis.

lights down