Articles for Smeet.com

A Good Word About Commitment

Hi, this is WillKane, and before we begin, I’d like to announce that with this journalist article we will launch an advice column about friendships, relationships, and all the things in between by an unofficial panel of Smeeters that have come together recently who have helped and will continue to help people in Smeet with any serious questions or issues about these things. We want all Smeeters to not only truly enjoy the site and each other, but we also understand that people just need some help in ways that real life may not be giving them at present, or at least be pointed in the right direction. Please keep in mind that advice in any of these articles at any point is no substitute for appropriate professional help and/or spiritual counseling, and we fully encourage those who get help from this column to seek follow-up in real life from trusted sources.

Also, a little bit about me in real life and before Smeet: Although far from perfect by any means, I have been happily married for over 5 years and enjoy spending time with my wife, writing (as if you couldn’t tell already, ha), playing tennis with the wife every so often, eating great food, being weird, playing fun games online and poking fun at things and people in an above-the-belt kind of way. I have been a moderator for Writing.com almost 12 years (my username there is Stallion), and I have also been the equivalent of a guide, super guide, and then part of an admin team on a family-friendly site called DittyTalk and then Miogate for 5 years total before they became defunct. I have been very blessed in those positions (and just as a regular guy) to have helped many people during that time in those places and on here, and have made a few wonderful friendships I will cherish for life. And now, I want to share a few thoughts about commitment below:

Sometimes I wonder if there aren’t many people these days that really understand the word “commitment,” much less live it in everyday life. And how can they? I see many, many things in today’s world working against true, meaningful commitment in friendships and relationships. Sure, we can always google the meaning or ask someone, but in my experience I’ve found that true commitment is best explained in terms of another word: covenant. The English word covenant from several sources goes back to the Latin word “convenire" which means “come together" (as in convene). And in the biblical Genesis account, the word for covenant in Hebrew is berith, which some believe come from the Hebrew “barah”, meaning “to cut.” While I have no intention of preaching or imposing any personal or religious beliefs on anyone, I still think we can learn something from ancient history going back to a couple of stories from Genesis. If you remember Abraham’s offering of animals and cutting some of them in two (gruesome and unsettling to some, I know, but please bear with me). And to me, this story reminds me of Adam and Eve when Adam fell into a deep sleep and his rib was removed and used to create Eve, who would become his wife. Now notice in both stories we have both a “cutting” involved (Adam with his rib, Abraham with the animals) in order to have two parties “come together” (Adam with Eve, and then Abraham with God). But there’s more to this than a boring history lesson.

From what I’ve read about and experienced firsthand, a covenant is the ultimate form of commitment to someone because there always has to be a “cutting” away of self before two people can truly “come together.” Now I don’t mean not having a personality or being who you are, but I’m talking about putting a stop every day to those selfish habits and self-centered tendencies that lead to wronging someone and otherwise getting in the way of truly caring about and loving someone in a fully committed relationship or friendship. I know it’s much, much easier said than done, and there are bound to be mistakes, no doubt. But if you really care for and love somebody, aren’t they worth it?

Now are there ways to break that kind of commitment? Definitely, even to the point of being beyond repair, but we can address that in another article. Also, how can you be committed to someone who just isn’t right for you? Again, we can save that for another blog entry. And where’s love in any of this, you may ask? Well-founded love is the key for any committed relationship or friendship to keep alive and to last. But we have to understand that love is not just some feeling that can pass away in a moment, over time, or at the first sign of trouble, mistrust, hardship, or even death. Because unless we are willing to give others what they do not deserve and not give them what they do deserve at each moment, then how can love really work, much less being committed to another? I’m not suggesting that there aren’t times when we have to just face the consequences of wrong actions, because there clearly are. And another very important part of any committed relationship is being right with that person and trusting that person will be right with you, no matter what. Again, it’s easier to say than do, much less each and every moment. But really, it boils down to this: are you and the person you care about and love willing to do whatever it takes, with help, to be unselfish, right with each other, trust each other, and never give up in any situation?

Hopefully, this article gets you thinking about these things in a good way. We welcome any and all serious questions about friendships, relationships, and so on. In fact, your questions and concerns will help us make future articles that will help even more people, both here in Smeet and beyond. So please feel free to message me at any point (my id is 24453995). We’ll be more than happy to answer as best we can.

Until next time, have fun and Happy Smeeting!



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"And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good, and acceptable, and perfect." -Romans 12:2

This is my webpage:
http://Writing.Com/authors/pinoy_celt
Check it out sometime and may God bless you!