Who do I still think I am??

This one's about ya hay-er. It's a mess.

BCF PROMPT: "In the old days, it was said, 'blondes had more fun'. With all the color options available to men and women today do you still think that still applies or does another hair color win? Or do you think it doesn't really matter?"

Hey y'all...what's the good word? Looks like we're goin' from a semi-serious tone to something I can have a little bit of fun with tonight. Not that I mind, of course. Hair's just a lot more fun to talk about than the stuff that makes sleeping suck.

The short story, "let's play the hits and go home", cop-out answer would just simply be "It doesn't effin' matter". Because it shouldn't, and that's why.

No really, why should anyone get to have more fun on the basis of the color of their hair?

Now for the reinforcements...

I have naturally brown hair. I guess you could say it's a darker blonde now, but I haven't actually paid attention to what my hair has looked like in a few months. I've had short hair, long hair, and no hair at some point in life. Right now it's fairly long. About five or six years ago I started to let it grow out because I was sick of getting it cut every three or four weeks to maintain "the look", whatever that was. I wound up having a ponytail about a third of the way down my back. I had it cut off after about three years so I could donate it to http://www.locksoflove.org/, and ever since then it feels like that's the best way to cycle out my hairstyles...just say screw it, let it grow 'til it's long enough to give it up, and then start all over again.

But that's not the point.

I've dyed my hair blonde plenty of times. I went through a phase where I was dying it jet black. I also tried dying it with Kool-Aid once, but all that really did was turn the inside of my Cleveland Indians cap into a bleeding raspberry-scented mess. And as much as any new hairdo will do wonders for your self-esteem, perspective or lot in life, yo, check this out: for the most part, you're still the same person on the inside. Changing your looks aren't always gonna change that. Sure, maybe you'll see different opportunities that you may not have seen before, but it all comes out in the proverbial wash anyway.

Here's an anecdote that may or may not prove my point...when I became old enough to be called an adult, I decided I was only gonna date blondes. Now, by then I was a decent enough lookin' guy, and I endured my share of awkwardness socially when I was younger, but I was in no way one who deserved the right to be callin' his shot when it came to the layyyy-deeeez. I had no business thinking that I was going to find the hottest blonde in the place just because that's what I wanted. But that's what I set out to do.

It took getting my heart broken a couple of times and breaking a few more in the process to realize that I was cutting myself off from large chunks of the population because of my stubbornness, let alone my prejudicial behavior in believing that these smokin' hot blonde chicks were supposed to be more fun and that I had to be with them because I like fun. Yet, in some cases the opposite could actually have been said...not only were some blondes complete exhausting bores, but I met more than a few brunettes who were absolutely a blast to be around. I had let my judgment get so out of whack by trusting my eyes over my brain and my brain over my heart. But that's how them newfangled young adult minds were geared to work back in the day, I figure.

Live and learn. What did I stand to gain by taking a stance against the rules of attraction in the name of my younger self and every other guy who was told by a close female friend that he'd be "the perfect boyfriend" if he "wasn't so short"? Nothing. Not a damn thing. When you limit yourself, you're just missin' out on a whole buncha other cool stuff. And that's from me to you.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

I have no good set-up for this song. But the title of it alone has occasionally led to beer commercial-worthy daydreams, even if the song itself means exactly the opposite of that.

THE DAILY BOX SCORE:

Here's how we know Miley Cyrus has proved the world wrong. Hear me through and don't interrupt. If celebrity is a germ, what's the biggest spreader of the disease? Word of mouth. Facebook, Twitter, and news outlets are still talking about the show she put on Sunday night at the VMA's. People far and wide are still howling her name in detest of her actions. But the world's only hearing her name, and that's all a person in the spotlight needs to push that fame train along...to the tune of her latest single showing a dramatic increase in sales. It just goes to show that for everyone out there deriding the former Hannah Montana (and there's a whole lotta ya), there are a bazillion more people who apparently approve of chicks attempting to douche with a giant foam finger in front of a large group of people while bootyshakin' up against a guy who had no career until he ripped off Marvin Gaye (much to the approval of his sitcom father-portraying father) as he danced behind her dressed in Beetlejuice's suit. And if that's really the case, then the world and its bazillion people would have been overpopulated to the point of saturation approximately 15 years ago (give or take a few percentage points for random unplanned natural disasters and other events that can cause population fluctuation). You know things like this are serious when I've taken the time to actually edit what I think to be the closest comparison between Miley and her potential doppelganger...as in, yes, I've created my first meme. It's crude in that there's no actual caption, I ripped off her pic from another meme, and it's not centered properly. But dammit, if everybody else is doin' it, at least I can contribute something that's original and hasn't been seen. Perhaps I'm just perpetuating the machine...but at least I'm doing it on my terms.

6/2: Likes and shares of my humble creation as of this writing. At that rate, I'll be internet famous well past the time we've all moved on from the internet to the next big thing that consumes too much of our lives.

And yes, I was a Bloom County fan in the eighties, even if I may have been too young at times to understand what the comic strips meant occasionally. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloom_County.

There is a reason why my personal YouTube channel (http://www.youtube.com/user/naikin3) only has four videos uploaded to it and one subscriber. And this is not why: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPx2uLibN2Q&list=PL658DC754FDB2C9FC. Or this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7Favks15Sw.

This is the kind of thing I'd normally share on Facebook, but I'm not going to because approximately a third of my Facebook friends have already shared it today, so it's kinda useless posting this link over there (even if it's one of the first links I read this morning)...http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjkiebus/reasons-being-a-buffalo-bills-fan-is-more-painf.... It's a Buffalo thing. I mean no disrespect to the birthers of children.

Ok, well, this has been a blasty and all, but I've got little to show for my efforts tonight so I'm gonna clear on outta this spot for the time being and make way for you to leave a thought or a kind word below. And if you have neither, leave that too! Peace, twerk it, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!