Who do I still think I am??

This one's about not drinking the kool aid.

BCF PROMPT: "If there were a real Fountain of Youth, would you drink the water?"

Good afternoon folks. I've decided that while I've still got internet access today that isn't totally crapping out on me, I'll be a good boy and try to play nice in the communal sandbox (no pun intended ). Call it what you want...I'm just here to try to figure out what all the loose words in my head are trying to say.

*Looks at prompt.*

*Grumbles.*

Sigh.

Was it Ponce de Leon who claimed to have found the "Fountain Of Youth"? Why, I believe so! And in believing everything the internet says, he founded this theme park in Florida also: http://www.fountainofyouthflorida.com/. But we all know that's a bunch of made-up nonsense. Fountains of youth exist about as much as anti-aging creams hide wrinkles (says the 38 year old who could pass for 24 with a proper shave and some poor lighting).

So let's say such an institute of age-defying outdoor plumbing (it's outdoors, no?) actually existed. What's the ground rules? Drink it, dip your toes in it, or full-on bathe in it like it's the antidote? Is there a charge, or is it free to the public? Are taxpayers funding it, and are the naturally beautiful and ageless paying for services they're not using so others can take advantage of it? I mean, for every action there's an equal and balanced opposite reaction of sorts (or something like that), so what's the trade off? This is where investigative blogging comes in handy, because there are people out there that are going to want answers to these questions.

But before I get too carried away, I'll simply answer the question. No, I would not. And for the very same reason that living forever seems like a bad idea: if everyone's doing it, or even a reasonable amount of people are doing it, then soon enough the world's gonna be overpopulated...probably by more people who shouldn't be trying to prolong life, and people who should be drinking it just aren't (think of all the educators and artists who died young and in their prime versus the criminals and other life-sucking members of society that well outlast their fifteen minutes of fame).

It's a nice idea to dream about, sure. And as writers one of our core tenets is dreaming. But we also live in a world where practicality wins out over far-fetched notions and "what if" questions. And today's topic du jour falls into that column. While you're wondering how great it would be to not age, you're getting older. When you're drinking the magic potion, the clock keeps ticking. It's an inescapable truth.

Besides, like all those other things that are supposedly good for you, the Fountain Of Youth probably tastes like ass anyway. That's why it's never been called "Chocolate Fountain Of Youth", "Beer Spout O' Youth", "Fresh Geyser Of Awesome Chili Dogs Guaranteed To Make You Lose Weight", or "Weird Cherubic Angel Coming Out Of The Ground In A Park That Looks Like It's Urinating Something That Will Make You Look And Feel Whatever Age You Want". Think about it.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Who needs a "fountain of youth", anyway?

THE DAILY BOX SCORE:

Still no monkey emoticon. But I saw this today and it'll have to do...and I can't seem to find a version that doesn't have the sides chopped off.

2nd Question: Why is it not as easy as you think it would be to Google a meme?

And no "fingers crossed" emoticon either. I can't be the only one who thinks about this stuff once in awhile, or thinks there'd be such a sure thing in particular in emoticon form, only to find there isn't. Anyway, I'm keeping my non-emoticon hand's fingers crossed that the internet here keeps working.

No ninja emoticon? Ok, now I might have to file a complaint with the necessary authorities. For the second time during his term as CEO of the USA, Barack Obama will be speaking in Buffalo, NY. And for the second time in his term, I won't be in town when he does. This furthers the notion that maybe...just maybe...we're the same person. (But probably not.)

Ok...the internet's playing along nicely with me for now, I don't feel like ranting, whining or ripping anyone's head off, and I'm running out of things to say, so I'm not gonna say anything else. Peace, oh yeah, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!