On My Happy Cloud

It's Good to Be Back!

Wow, it's been a while. And now that I can afford it I'm paying for my account so I can blog. The craving to do so is hard...like an extreme thirst. I don't know where else to put my thoughts....

So much has changed!! That person I wrote about before...I'll never mention his name again....left me to pursue his writing career in Portland. I will not spend anymore energy on speaking or thinking of him ever again.

The good news is that I've met someone wonderful and we're engaged to be married in Hawaii in October of this year. I can't even begin to describe how wonderful it is to be with him.

We're the perfect fit, we love living together, we enjoy the same exact things. I didn't realize that relationships didn't have to have some craziness to them. There is no craziness, no imperfections, red flags, arguments, jealousy, lack of loyalty or trust. Not to mention he's not a pot head who needs to toke up and drink beer to feel like a normal human being :/

Heh. We're looking forward to a long life together.

I moved about an hour away from my family to live with him. We both work for the same company and I make more money than I ever have before so we live comfortably. No more worrying about when, or IF for that matter, our bills are going to be paid. I'm able to put back enough money each week to pay for our wedding/honeymoon myself. He just takes care of the rest of the bills. There is no struggle anymore.

The only problem I really have is that I hate where I work. Aside from the fact that there will be a company trip to Switzerland in September, there isn't anything I enjoy about this job. No one seems to know what they're doing. Though, I think people are in the process of getting that fixed. The biggest problem is that even though there is chaos, some fake being calm to make it appear that they know what they're doing. Like a duck on water. Calm up top, crazy paddling below.

Not to mention just how LAME everyone is! My last job I worked with the coolest people. I worked with 3 ME'S! I LOVED what I did and who I worked with. Nothing can ever compare to that and I was so devastated when I had to leave. I do not connect with anyone here. At. All. I try to be friendly but it's so fake that it makes my cheeks hurt and I constantly have to fight with my eyeballs to keep them from rolling.

Like for instance, I was talking to one of our summer interns. Just literally making conversation...here's how that went:

Me: "Oh, you got a haircut. That must be nice for the summer time."

Him: "I really don't wanna talk about it."

*sigh* really? WTF?

He saw that I was a bit taken aback and said: "It's just a long story."

Me (with really only a half a cup of coffee and a hateful outlook on the world already) in a somewhat cranky tone: "Really? I thought it was just a hair cut."

It's awful feeling this disconnected from people. I mean, I'm a bit of a loner anyway but work really does rock when you work with cool people who are just like you.

I think about 90% of my journal entries are going to be about how I feel about working here. For now, this one is a "catch-up" entry. So on to other things:

One of my other sisters, Bee I'll call her, got married last year and had a baby boy. I love that little guy. He's 6 months old and awesome. So now I have a niece, my little bear, and my nephy-poo. I also have a bad case of the babyfever :) Which is nice cause my man is excited to have a family too. Which makes having baby fever so much easier when the other person wants the same thing! We're so eager, in fact, that we plan on starting a family as early as later this year. And even though it's a secret to the rest of the family, my sister, Ray I'll call her, told me that her and her husband are trying for another baby. How cool would it be to have one at the same time?

Okay, this was probably pretty boring. I'm sure it will get more interesting. I'm so happy to be doing this again.

Until next time....or much love and happiness,

Elaine Bradley