Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about a case of the Mondays.

THE PROMPT: "Monday Muse" 

Good evening everybody! What's happenin'? Tonight we're led by skilled bloggist Prosperous Snow celebrating , who's taken time from her two other offsite blogs to share with us her Monday Muse. Three blogs? Wow...I barely have enough nourishment to satisfy one blog on a daily basis, and Snow's got three? Let me know how ya grew all those extra hands to type them all with!

So my Monday Muse...takes away my ability to choose...allows no clues...knows how to confuse...draws into my spirit to dampen my fuse...oh, my Monday Muse.

Well, if I had one, I imagine that's how it would be. I typically don't do much on Mondays; today being the exception in that I worked. So I had a reason to accomplish something. But this concept of a muse, as romantic as it seems, doesn't exist for me. I just kinda go with the flow, and whatever comes out is what comes out. Sure, sometimes I have motivation, but that's purely a personal thing, I assume. There is no diety hovering over me, waiting to tap me on the shoulder with a pen saying, "It's time." Quite the contrary, actually. Once I saw the prompt my mind went blank. I'm talking bleached canvas blank. I won't say I panicked, but I was uneasy. So I did what I do best in these situations...I procrastinated. Perhaps that was my muse's way of staying in control...by staying in the background and away from the scenes, drawing me back until it feels like I've wasted enough time and am closer to the deadline, so I feel like I've got a little pressure and can respond in some kind of moving way. The kind of way where I think I've just written the most random things, but everybody comes away feeling something special that I, as the writer of it, didn't even notice.

If that's the case, and that's my muse, I'm naming him Holden.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Since we're on the subject, I'll take the easy way out and put this on tonight.

VITAL STATS:

World, be put on notice! Tonight is the debut of my soon-to-be-famous, secret recipe, homemade spaghetti sauce! I made a small test batch for myself last night (first time ever) and it turned out way more awesome than the store-bought junk, so I green-lighted myself the opportunity to make it for the rest of the house tonight. One out of three so far has enjoyed it; the other two are at work. Ladies and gentlemen, consider this another notch in my rolling pin, for I have finally celebrated the Italian part of my heritage properly by creating a homemade sauce that does. not. suck.

And I think that's how my muse, Holden, sneaks up on me. It was just me for dinner last night, wasn't sure what I wanted, saw the ingredients, and was like, "Dude, why the eff not?" Ahhh, Holden, you sneaky lil' bastage.

From the files of Retail Idiocity: A customer comes to the checkout and buys two bottles of Finest Natural vitamins. She cashes out, and I'm called up front for assistance. She asked me why they weren't on sale. I looked at the ad and explained to her that the brand she purchased was, in fact, not on sale this week, but other brands were. She shows me the bottle, which is marked "For distribution at Walgreens". That's all well and good, lady, but it's still Finest Natural. I explain to her that it is not a Walgreens brand product, and she is confused. I had to explain to her that there's a difference between a company making a product for us to sell, and Walgreens having their own products to sell. She's still not getting it. "So Walgreens has its own brand of vitamins?" she asked. "Yes, we do" I told her, being about as nice as I could be under the circumstances. "Well, what's it called then?" she asked me, sounding of disbelief. I took a breath, paused, and said, "Walgreens".

And that's why I prefer not working on any day that ends in "y".

So that's where the story for today ends, gentle readers. May your night find you all in good hands. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!