The Ragnarok Trials

Day Twelve: Virtual Insanity

Day Twelve
         Virtual Insanity
Focus Word: Sanity
Word Count: 1740

I was in Heaven almost before I sensed the tug.

"You have a day left," Gabriel said, voice harsh and arms crossed against his chest. "One day and Michael will pass judgement upon you for your crimes against Christ's law."

This might seem odd to those of you who've been following along closely. Gabriel knew I was innocent--his adventures in crazy Norse land had actually proved that to him--but here he was, bad ass Angel face, flowy Angel hair, and full on armor (he was even wearing his sword, which I have never seen in all the time I've been up here), telling me my time was almost up.

It's okay, guys, I was fine. Michael was no doubt keeping an eye on the proceedings here, though he was obviously too busy to come down and handle me myself. I will give it to the guy, he does get a lot done. Heaven runs very smoothly these days, what with the rough start at the beginning of their ascendency. God's really a hands-off sort of deity, and that led to a bit of chaos in his realm over the years (and among his followers, truth be told--I have never seen so many different branches of a faith before), and once Christ ascended to God levels, they had to completely overhaul the place. It's largely Michael's doing that souls aren't running around like headless chickens and unplugging the universe, or something.

One could almost understand why he had a stick up his butt. I mean, he's got a lot of responsibility. But I've always wanted to tell him that he'd get more flies with honey. Of course, he probably wouldn't quite get the meaning of what I was saying; he's a tad literal-minded. It works for him, though, apparently. And, like I said, Heaven is looking mighty fine these days. Well, at least what I could see of it.

I had mostly learned to deal with the pain. In fact, since Gabriel and I had become...intimate, the pain wasn't nearly as wracking as it used to be. Oh, it hurt. Believe me, it was excruciating to be standing here, my knees turning to jelly and even my eyelashes quivering with sharp pain, but the pressure had lifted somewhat from my lungs, and I could stand straightish without needing to lean against a piece of furniture. So, that was good. And curious. I wonder if it would get better every time Gabe and I slept together.

Well, I would just have to find out.

"I am aware, Gabriel, of my upcoming and impending doom. And things are coming together nicely, I believe. I'm headed to see Ares and Athena later today, and then I will meet with Bacchus to see if he has any information I might need to know. You may tell Michael that he will get some sort of judgement out of me." I smiled sardonically, not wanting to let on to Michael that I was terrified. I was, of course. Things were not coming together as well as I had hoped.

See, my most crucial piece of evidence came from Gabriel's investigation of Baldur's body. And I couldn't very well use it, as that would be evidence that Gabriel had circumvented Michael's decree. Not only that, but it would alert Michael to his Angels' escapades in human flesh, effectively ending the one escape that many of them could enjoy. It would not go well. And I wasn't about to do that to Gabriel, or even to his Angelic cohorts.

"Good. I shall return you to your abode now."

The world around me, bright white and plain as ever, dimmed as I was expelled from Heaven. I landed on my couch, the sudden lack of pain jolting me onto the floor, where I promptly cracked my skull against the tiles to be found there. "Apologies, Loki. I was not allowed to be kind."

"Ah, so you followed me, shnookums," I replied, hissing at the sharp pain lancing its way through my head. It wasn't bad--nothing was bad compared to Heaven and that damnable snake--but it was an unpleasant situation that only worsened as I stood and blood rushed upward. "I'm pretty sure Michael bought it, if that's what you're wondering."

"Oh, I know he bought it. He was watching very closely." Gabriel sighed. "He is not entirely sure it is you anymore, Loki. He cannot feel the stain of your perpetual guilt so heavily upon his shoulders. He says you have become...more human. Michael doesn't want to kill you, Loki, but he is prepared to do so if it will end war between our kind."

I shook my head. "They're not really clamoring for my blood anymore, Gabe. Mostly, they're trying to kill each other out there. The Norse want to rise up and gain their autonomy back, but not all of them. The Greeks and the Celts are fighting back because they like existence, but not all of them are taking part in that, either. Several other pantheons are keeping a close eye out, determined to pick a side whenever it becomes clear who the victor will be."

"They have to realize we'd win, right?" Gabriel was sitting on the other end of the couch, legs crossed and leaning against the arm. "There was a time that your kind could have defeated ours, but the time his past. And further..."

"Our existence is tied up in Christ's benevolence. And his gift. If we break his commandments, there is a good chance he will revoke that gift and we will become as nothing. Yes, yes, I know..." I shambled into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water, popping open a bottle of aspirin as I did so. "There are those who believe they would prefer oblivion."

Gabriel shrugged. "Perhaps they do prefer oblivion. Perhaps spending so much time on this planet, surrounded and encased in flesh, has stripped away their sanity. It is a world that is virtually all they had once known, but the second they attempt to reach for it, they realize that what they know and love is gone. A piece of themselves, missing forever. It's something that would test even the strongest, most faithful mind. They might think that this world they're living in has got to change somehow because they can't go on living in..." Gabriel trailed off here, waving his hand for emphasis as he struggled to think of the word.

"Virtual insanity," I whispered. "A virtual reality, and so virtual insanity. You sound like you pity our predicament, Gabriel."

The Angel shrugged. "I do. Somewhat. Gods are ideas, and when that idea changes, is made useless by advancing technology, Gods have a hard time changing with it. They are a crystallized version of themselves. Some of you can accept change--and easily--others...I don't know. Admittedly, I would be glad simply to exist, but I can imagine how this existence would be worse than oblivion for some."

An idea occurred to me, then. "But, Gabe, they're not trying to bring about oblivion. They are attempting to recreate their own power so they can rise against you. That's exactly what they're doing."

"Hmm...you are correct. But that speaks of hubris..."

"Gods and hubris are always one, Gabe. But it also gives me an idea. Proud gods are arrogant gods, and none so arrogant as those they believe they can do whatever they want, whenever they want. I think if we give them a virtual truth of our own..."

Gabriel sat up in his seat, and turned a slow smile to me. "If we convince them of your guilt, say, and make to execute you, their arrogance will get the best of them..."

I nodded. "Yes. And that evidence of ours will become known by everyone."

"Ah, the devious nature of the silver-tongued one. You are still so much yourself, despite the humanity growing within you. Always looking to spin lies, you are." Gabriel laughed and, as I sat myself beside him on the couch, reached out to brush a lock of errant hair out of my eyes. "I suppose I'll forgive you these lies, if only because they are used to save yourself and bring a killer to justice."

"Lies are not inherently bad, you know. They are sometimes used to ease pains, and to spare fear. I have used them in this manner a great deal over the centuries, though they availed me not. Perhaps I should have used them more...my truths got me punished more often than not." I rubbed my lips, feeling the millennia old scars there, reminded of the beings who'd given them to me. "And my own need to prove my intelligence."

Gabriel stared at my lips, reaching out to touch them with just the tips of his fingers. "How did you get these?"

"My gifts were judged to be worthless next to a dwarf's. A hammer was judged the greatest gift, above Sif's golden hair and a magickal javelin. And since I had bet my head, but not my neck, they sewed my lips together. Thor held me down while they did it. All the times I'd helped him over the years, and he always followed the letter of the law. And he damn near broke all the bones in my body when he found out I shaved his wife's head."

Gabriel raised an eyebrow. "Why on Earth would you do something like that?"

I laughed and shrugged. "Because I could. And I wanted to see what would happen."

"How many times did that work out for you?"

"Hmm, you did find me in a cave, chained up and slowly dying of boredom," I replied, turning so my head was lying on his lap. "But there was a time I was a blood brother to Odin, an honorary Aesir, one of the gods. And that was the highlight of my existence. So I guess it worked out well enough. All things in balance, even chaos."

Gabriel chuckled, running his fingers through my hair and along my arm. "Well, that's true enough. Now, about those lies...we should probably get to work proving you guilty. You've only got a day to put this all together, so we'd better get going."

"Indubitably. Let's get to it, then. It's been a while since I pulled a charade this big, and I'm a little out of practice. Wouldn't want to fuck it up."