Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about...WTF??

THE PROMPT: "AHHHH!!!! It's the Zombie Apocalypse! Run for your good-for-nothing lives!

Okay, hopefully that got your heart racing, and your brain a-firing. The situation is grim, the undead are coming for the brains of the living and you must protect yourself and your loved ones.

What would you use to protect yourself if ZA occurred right this second?

This means that you are limited to what is in your place of residence/work/education/wherever you are. Be realistic- you probably don't own an assault rifle, machine gun, flamethrower, or a bazooka, or some other such weapon. Be practical- do you really want to lug around a 10lb chainsaw, especially when it attracts more undead through noise, gets stuck, and more than likely you don't know how to use? Less is more- Limit yourself to as few weapons as possible, which will help you out at all ranges of combat- Far range, Medium Range, Close range, and Intimate range.

Well, I'm off to grab my weapons- oh wait, I just picked up a sand-wedge golf club. Not ideal, but it will do until I can get to the 12-gauge and the 30-06 in the back bedroom. Oh, and I just grabbed my sword-like letter opener- perfect for stabbing a Zed through the ear canal."

Ok, I have zero experience with zombies. I could give a fuck about them. I don't watch movies and I've never read a book about them. So, to me, they don't exist. I don't even know what they are. Hearing about them gives me hives. Weapons?? Is this a freakin' video game?? I so am not the person to be responding to this prompt. It's too advanced and too far out of my league.

How's this? When these zombies attack, I throw books at them? Just to get them off their game (whatever that game is). No, better yet, we try to bro and chick it out with hugs and chili dogs. Like, "Hey, we don't really have to all lose our brains...we can talk it out and stuff." And then I convert them to my side of things. Humanity is saved once again.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Only to celebrate my least-favorite prompt ever: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LE0KpcP05I&ob=av3e Even worse? I have to suffer through this song at work every couple of hours or so.

VITAL STATS:

This is not even enjoyable for me tonight. I don't mean to call this prompt stupid, because it's not. It's just that it's 100% +5 unrelatable, no matter how much imagination I put into it. The end result is an entry shorter than the prompt itself. And like prompt, the entry is not interesting. That is all. Thank you, and GOODNIGHT NOW.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=6Ejga4kJUts