My Thoughts: when the mood strikes.

Saturday, September 24, 2011, 10:56am

Saturday, September 24, 2011, 10:56am

         I have been awake for two hours, made the bed and a cup of tea... other than that, been on the computer all morning----checking e-mails and facebook updates and comments.  Found a beautiful picture of parakeets (or parrots?) from Discovery Cove in Orlando, Florida. 

         Big changes are happening in my life.  My lease expires on September 30.  Was going to rent a smaller apartment here in the same complex, but then had two bills/cancellations at month-end I was worrying about... sick to my stomach.  Living in Daphne, Alabama has been hell for me----the worst two years of my life thus far, and I am 53.  I remembered back to a time when my sister moved to Florida and went through hell...  My thought at the time, she really is not supposed to be here.  That thought was re-sparked in my mind this week ---- I am really not supposed to be here.  I remember the scripture where the Lord said, Why do you kick against the goads?  That's me----kicking against the goads for a year and a half.

         I am moving back in with my parents, and saving money for the next six months.  My plan is to move back to Florida in the Spring.  Thank God!  I have a plan... a good plan, finally! 

         Living with my parents is not the best scenario, but it will help bring about this very needed change in my life.  Most importantly, my daughter and her family are there.  But also, jobs are more plentiful in the Tampa Bay area; many people know me there --- both professionally and personally.  God, I am thankful for open doors!  The right open door for me.

         Except for the wealthy, life choices are not easily made in this great land of the U.S.A., but fraught with many struggles --- which can be overwhelming... even unto death.

O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee, and I detest all my sins, because of thy just punishments, but most of all because they offend Thee, my God, Who art all-good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin. Amen./1/

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/1/ Catholic Act (prayer) of Contrition