Surprise

Relationship phobia

Every time I think am ready to take the risk and jump into a relationship, something happens that reminds me of all the reasons why I am not in a relationship. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against relationships. If anything I think that they are very healthy. Only I also think that not everyone was meant to be in a relationship and I happen to be part of those select few. There are times I think that I am too independent and maybe selfish, since I have been on my own for so long I don’t how to share my time or anything else. This time though for some time I actually sat down and considered it. The person in question was caring, concerned and willing to wait for me till I was ready. I thought I had finally met someone who would make me reconsider my stand. Something however kept nagging me at the back of my mind; no one could be this perfect. I decided to give it some more time before I told him how I felt. The first time he brought up the issue of my past relationships I thought he was just curious and wanted to know my past. I answered him as best as I could. But the questions kept coming and coming till I became irritated. I tried my best to let him know I wasn’t comfortable and he conceded at least for a few days then the questions came again and this time they were more personal. As much as I know that before getting into something you have to know what it is this is just plain uncomfortable for me and I can’t keep pretending anymore. He should have been content with whatever I gave him. I acknowledge I have a past, but that’s where I want it to remain. He accepted me the way I was when we met, who I dated in the past shouldn’t matter and neither should what I did with those I’ve dated in the past.