Break the Cycle

Obstacle: A Setback

I haven't been here in a while, and I only come to report I've had some setbacks lately. I thought I could tackle this on my own, but I seriously think it's time to go back to a professional. I refuse to see a psychiatrist because I don't want to be on meds. The last time I was on medication for emotional problems things went from bad to worse. This has made me fearful of going back to any sort of counselor, actually. The only person who was any benefit was someone I saw back in high school, and I know she doesn't provide counselling for adults. Likewise, money is an issue. I don't know if I can afford to go since mi amor and I bought a new condo. Still, I've only figured out that big stuff doesn't make me angry, but little shit sets me off like whoa. I've also made people fear I'll be violent, which I haven't done in years. I don't know. I don't want to go to counseling, but I'm afraid to find out what the alternative is. And don't get me started on the subject of self medicating. I'm doing everything in my power not to be an alcoholic, but if my anger continues to cause problems, well, I just might head down that path.