middleblog-a suburban babble brook book

An Aside: Ebay, Bloody Ebay

         I should be peering myopically at the screen, listing things on eBay right now, Sunday evening being prime shopping time... 

         Despite my mildly extensive experience with eBay, I have to admit, my feelings regarding it are ambivalent at best.  Granted, there is the odd bit of happy surprise when an item sells for, not only far more than what I paid (nothing is not hard to surpass ;P ) but for far more than I anticipated.  And, as anywhere else on the Net, there are many folks on eBay who are a joy to interact with, cheerful souls happy to share their experience and expertise.

          But, as elsewhere, there are many folks who are surly, grumpy, supercilious, and a number of less positive adjectives.  I can't get over folks anticipating an item's arrival in record time-they order from corporations, pay sometimes exhorbitant handling fees, and then must wait 4-6 weeks for delivery unless they pay extra, but for some perverse reason they expect the small time, personal seller who is responsible for every aspect of the entire sales process to hand deliver their .95 item on a silver salver within 24 hours.  For free, mind you.  Ok, I exaggerate, but seriously, these cats can get a little hinky about delivery times.  Especially those who opt to pay with money orders-I can wait for my money, but boy-gee, I'd better get their goods to them in double-time or it's neutral feedback for me!  Seriously.  I had a woman receive her vintage fruit juice set within seven actual (not business) days of my receiving her money order, and she leaves me a neutral, stating my ship time was too slow! Really?!? I mean, REALLY?!?

          Writing of money orders, here's a fun fact for you crazy cats to ponder-if you receive a Western Union money order, you can't just go cash it at any old Western Union.  Nope, you have to go to the same chain store that sold it (say, Joe Schmoe's Gas n Go) or the exact store it was purchased from.  Really!  So if you get a Western Union money order from East Cuddy Overshoe's Stop n Slop, you can  a. deposit it in your bank account (standard practice, I know) b. locate a Stop n Slop near you, or c. hop a plane, train, or donkey to East Cuddy Overshoe.  I've stopped accepting any but postal money orders (cashable at any P.U. P.O-just make sure you bring your license) because the Western Union thing irked me so.

          Oh, and the Post Office-don't let me get started on them.  For some mysterious reason, eBay renders a shipping quote miles away from the actual cost of the item (my local Post Mister said it's because they're involved with a separate union, or some such bureaucratic bullsh*t).  Especially for international shipping.  So, as a result, extra work is generated no matter how you slice it-you either run back and forth to the post office or spend lots of quality time on hold with the toll-free post office number for the exact price for your invoice, or, as I do, shrug your shoulders, make note of the difference, and issue a small shipping refund.  Extra work, and every second of work detracts from your profits.  I'm not even sure I make minimum wage, but I guess I shouldn't bitch too much-it is quite all right to stay home, in my living room, puttering and pottering.

         Now, for added fun, eBay in its infinite wisdom has evidently concluded that the medieval serfs had it pretty damn good, and eBay sellers should enjoy some of the same benefits.  For those of you unfamiliar with eBay (keep it that way, is my advice), it features a nifty institution called feedback.  You buy my fabulous vintage manure, and then, when the transaction is concluded, you leave me feedback (positive, neutral, or negative) to let other potential buyers know how your experience was.  As a seller, I, too, could leave you feedback.  Really, a wonderful idea, no? Lends a nice personal touch, keeps things friendly.  Ideally.

         Well, little in this life of ours seems to work out ideally.  As a seller, I personally would wait until receiving feedback before leaving feedback, for a couple of reasons-a. I'm not going to waste my time leaving feedback for people who didn't waste their time, and b. I'm not going to leave you feedback to have you, maybe,  leave me crappy feedback.  Feedback can't be retracted, only mutually withdrawn (the adult version of "Now apologize, and shake hands!").  I think a few two many sellers were wrongfully retorting tit-for-tat, though, so eBay decided to institute a fiefdom.  Now, I as a seller can only leave you, the buyer of my fabulous vintage manure, positive feedback, or none at all.

         Really!?

          It occurred to me today that this is very medieval.  I work hard for those dollars, but because you, the seller, control the money, you control the manor.  End of story.  Really!

         I think a lot of buyers have no real clue as to how much work goes into eBay.  It does have its creative aspects that I enjoy; picture taking, writing listings, playing with interesting objects.  But it also has some mighty tedious chores associated with it, like shipping.  I always pack excessively, especially brittles-I worked for the post office, and one thing I remember is, if it ain't insured, tough titty for the customer.  Those folks are after speed foremost, so there's an excellent chance your package will be thrown, spindled, and mutilated.  The Post Office can be harsh, so pack accordingly.
(As an aside, you should show your local mail carrier some love-in essence, they need to perform two jobs-the initial sorting of 700 or more addresses, and then the delivery of all 700 + addresses.  The routes are rated-so if your postal carrier has a route rated to take six hours, and they take eight, tough titty for them, too. So be pleasant even if they're late. And those little white postal trucks are an unholy nightmare to drive-more than 35 MPH and you're sure you're hurtling towards your demise. Trust me. Love your carrier.)

          The shipping end is always like pulling teeth for me-I have to gear up to "ship sh*t", as I inelegantly put it.  You get to go stand in line at the P.U.  P.O. with a big black plastic sack on your back like some sort of off-season Santy Claus (you can just dump them on the counter and run, but I like to see them go over the counter and into the bins.  Anal, I guess. What some call common sense, others label paranoia.), and find out how far off the mark your latest international shipping charges were, oh, and ship First Class International by hand, because while eBay offers a First Class shipping quote, you can't print labels through PayPal like you can all the others.  Doubtless another union disunion snafu.  Ho, hum.  There is an option to schedule a pickup of your multiple packages by the P.U. P.O., but I've shied away from exploring that option because, frankly, I treat the P.U. P.O. with the heavy suspicion of an animal that's been beaten one time too many.  Although the Middleboro office is quite pleasant and accomodating.

          For my final rant (for this evening, anyhoo-trust me, I've just dipped a toe in this ocean), I can't get over my disappointments with eBay.  Too often, I've won an item and looked forward to its arrival with keen anticipation, only to receive it, inspect it, and say, "Oh. Well, it's o.k. I guess.".  I had to learn the hard way that, if you can't actually handle the item you're interested in, you should save your money.  Then, of course, there are the items I list, having seen the EXACT same items sell well the week prior, and I get cricket turds on a shingle for them.

          Or, contemplate the fact that the two people I introduced to eBay both went on spending sprees that they could ill afford, buying crap they didn't need.  At least they weren't as consistently disappointed as I've been, but still, I got them addicted to eBay.  One has mercifully managed to shake her habit, and has now graduated to selling, but my sweets, unfortunately, still can't quell the urge to click. 

          Wow, I feel so much better for this rant-it was like draining a spiritual abscess.  Off I go, listing the while!

If you like vintage sterling and books, feel free to check me out-ebay member id = ahceela.