Dear Lucy

October 10th - October 12

                                                                                                                     October, 10th, 2007

Dear Lucy!

I was happy to go to work today. Actually I was even looking forward to it. And, yes, I have to admit it was because of Dana.
Unfortunately, she wasn't even in today. I don't know where she was. But when I came to work this morning, I didn't see her car in the car park. At first I thought, okay, there are a lot of cars and maybe she's parked somewhere else.

I sent her a message over the computer, but didn't get an answer. I went and knocked at her bureau door at lunch time. No one there.

No idea, why she wasn't in. It disappointed me. More than I like to admit. Because I wanted to thank her for yesterday. And because I was looking forward to seeing her again. I admit that. There's nothing bad about that, right? It was an innocent joy to meet someone again. Someone that it's fun to spend time with. That's all.

But it doesn't matter. Because she wasn't in anyway.
And the rest of my day was boring. Now I am sat on my couch, watching music channels and wondering what to do next.

Oh, the telephone is ringing.....



.....Hey, I'm back. It was Nadja. We chatted for about an hour. I haven't told her about my lunch break with Dana. Why not, you ask? If she's the only friend I have by now. I just didn't feel that way. No, I'm not hiding it from her. There's nothing to hide. But we're not a couple and I don't need to tell her everything that happens in my life.....well, we have a date tomorrow evening. Going out to the cinema. It's new premier day and she seem's to be a film freak just like me. Maybe I will tell her about Dana then.

Oh god, that sounds as if I'm cheating on her. Listen to me! Jesus! I'm not cheating on her or doing anything wrong. There's nothing going on between Nadja and me or Dana and me. So no need to worry that either of them finds out about the other.

I'm looking forward to meeting with Nadja again. We always seem to have a lot of fun together. She said she would bring some of her friends. So I'm going to get to know some more people. That's good. I really would like to get a group of friends to hang out with. We'll see if it will work with Nadja and her clique. If they're as friendly as she is, it will be possible. I will keep you informed.

Sleep well.

Yours,

                    Myra




                                                                                                                       October, 12th, 2007

Dear Lucy!

Sorry that I didn't write to you yesterday. I was too tired after the cinema.

Nadja's friends were really nice. I think they already have me accepted as a new member to their group. I wouldn't go that fast though.

They're all about the same age as Nadja, 18 to 19. I'm not sure if that is a bit too young for me. They have other views on things as I do. I mean, that might sound a bit stupid, since I'm only 24, but still. Even though they were nice, they are different. Doesn't mean, that we can't be friends.
Especially since I really like Nadja. And in liking her, I will have to like her friends as well.

We still haven't taken anything any step further. Friendship is our main reason for now to be together. I hope she feels the same. She was a bit huggy yesterday, trying to stand beside me all the time. Maybe it was just my imagination though. My fear that she won't be able to not cross that line. But then again, why should there be a problem? She hasn't said anything in a different direction. I mean, she hasn't said anything that she felt more towards me now. I try to keep an eye open to see any signs for it.

Oh, by the way, Dana wasn't in again today. And yesterday either. I still haven't heard anything new from her. I hope everything is okay. There is no one I could ask why she's not coming in. I don't dare to ask Mark. It would sound too nosy, I think. Because it's none of my business why a colleague isn't at work, right? Though it would be okay, if he knew that we are friends. But we're not. Yet.
I feel that it would be so good for me to become friends with Dana. She seems to be such a special person. There's something connecting us. I'm not talking about THAT kind of connection. I mean, a friendship thing. Like, when you meet someone and you feel as if you knew them since forever. That's how I feel about Dana. Like we grew up together. Maybe that's why I worry when I don't know why she's not coming to work. I hope so much, that she will accept me as a friend. As someone that she can trust. Maybe she feels the same way about me. Maybe she realised that connection we have. I don't want it to be just my imagination. I want it to be real.

Oh, another thing. The boss came in today. He told me that he was very satisfied about my work in the company. That even since the department I'm working in at the moment isn't my line of work, I do good. And he said, that I'm going to work with the web design guy from next week on. For a test week or something.
That web design guy is leaving the company in two weeks and he's supposed to show me some stuff. Plus, I'm supposed to work on a small project. Design project. The boss hasn't said yet what exactly it will be, but that the other applicants for the job are on it as well. And I didn't even know that there are others, chasing for the job. Stupid me!

I'm excited about that project now. And curious what it will be. And scared that I won't pass. That I will have to leave the firm. And Dana.

Wish me luck, now already!

Yours,

                          Myra