What am I Doing Here?

Why again?

You know there are two things that everyone can count on. Death and taxes. That is an old stand by to be sure. Since I have already paid my taxes I wish to make a comment on the first item.
Death.
It comes to everyone and everything.
You might cheat is with a defibrilator once but Death will come in the end.
Sometimes it is welcome.
Sometimes people and animals fight like Hell to beat it, but it will always win.
However when it comes is not always fair. But as I read somewhere, the Bible says that God never promised us a life that was always beautiful and fair.
I have recently experienced a death that was welcome. I had a chance to grieve when Pumpkin was sick and after he died. I knew that his passing was going to release him from pain and suffering. It was welcome. However I still believe that he was fighting it.
Twenty-four hours ago, I found a special friend, a Muscovy duck that I had befriended dead. It looked like she was trying to escape something terrible. A big dog? A human being? An alligator snapping turtle? Another duck who was attacking her? or Kids who were chasing her to be cruel.
She made it to a bridge area in the park where she lived but could not get past a bar there. I think that she struggled so hard that she may have caused some internal injuries. She died in the water. That is where I found her. Stiff. Alone. Cold. Dead.
I don't think that I have ever cried harder than I did for her. I was trying to relocate her to a place where she was to enjoy the friendship of other ducks for the first time in about 6-7 years. I am sorry. I was too late in that project. My friend Blue Monster says to move on. I just have to grieve and try to put the pieces of this puzzle together. How did she die? And could I have helped her? I'll never know.
All I do know is that this month of May, 2008 has given me a double whammy loss. I don't look forward to much right now. I just want to see justice for my friend, Homewood Duck. I'll miss her. I'll miss the little tail wiggling she did that told me she was happy. I'll miss seeing her eat her food. I'll miss seeing her swim in the pond. I'll miss her.
Good-bye Homewood. I love you also. I hope that you are in heaven with other ducks and not in any pain. :(