Point of View

Use your Mirror

From the brightly lit window of my third place the morning sun warms my face and helps me shake off the turmoil of the prior day. As is customary with Phoenicians, the sun has always brought out a wide range of fashion practices, most meant to provide comfort in the desert heat. This time of year, when the air carries the chill of an eastern fall and the sun contradicts with tempting temperatures, people seem to throw better judgment to the wind and wear outfits that are normally found at a Saturday bizarre.
The Sunday crowds are early risers and vary from the sharply dressed just-come-from-church look to the sweaty just-had-a morning-run look. So far, so good; I am one of the casual dressers donned in my jogging outfit for comfort. No, running is something better left for marathon runners or those fleeing the police. I prefer to stroll at a nice leisurely pace and take in my surroundings. That being said, let’s get back to the fashion disasters that I typically see while enjoying my daily intake of caffeine.
Girls; if you are no longer a teenager and especially are pushing the age of grandmother years, mini-skirts are not for you. Actually, anything that has the word “mini” in it should probably be avoided at all costs. I don’t think this is a shallow observation judging by the other “bitter-beer” type looks of my fellow coffee drinkers, some here with their families.
Guys; just have your wives, girlfriends, mothers, or neighbor look you over before you head out. Of course, if she is the mini-skirt wearer above, go elsewhere.
It used to be the symbol of a plumber hard at work, but now I am seeing more “crack” then a dealer of the same name. They are not always sported by my male counter-parts as the denim pant has dropped in altitude and the invention of the thong has been thrust upon us. Again, a second pair of eyes should be employed prior to leaving the house as only certain people can “pull” off that look without causing nausea and blurred vision. This rule applies to half-shirts as well. If you look like the top of a muffin, you should not wear half-shirts, halters tops, or bikini tops in public. Guys, this applies to us as well but for the following reasons. You’re not as “buff” as you might think and beer-guts do not count. Also, if you look like a woolly-mammoth follow the advice of the “No-Shirt, No-Service” rule and cover up. No one wants to hear the sound of you back hair rustling in the breeze. 
Please, a little common courtesy and self respect will go along way.

This has been a public service message.