We didn't plan for this to happen

Bad news

November, 2007

My husband, Chris, received some terrible news today. His biological father has been diagnosed with a rare brain disorder. It affects his temporal lobe, and it is degenerative. His behavior will become strange, he’ll curse and shout or laugh for no reason, he’ll become aggressive, and as time passes, he’ll forget who people are and he won’t know where he is.

This is a particularly hard blow for Chris because for many years they did not speak. Chris was angry with his father for perfectly sound reasons, and they did not exchange one word for over five years. His father didn’t even come to our wedding, because he says he didn’t want to see his ex, Chris’s mom (which I think is totally selfish and childish). Chris forgave him for that, and we went to his house and the whole time all he did was talk badly about Chris’s mom and the rest of Chris’s maternal side of the family. This pissed Chris off because his father did not raise him, his maternal side of the family did. So after the visit Chris was angry and hurt, and refused to talk to his father ever again.

He changed his mind while I was recuperating in the ICU. He called his father after five years, and they finally reconnected, which I had been urging him to do for several years. But now he’s found out that his father is slowly going to go crazy. The eventual result will be death, and the specialists told him he only has a few years left.

His father is retiring early, but they won’t be able to make the trip to visit Cadence like they planned, as he was only diagnosed a few days ago, and they are still in serious shock.