Diary of a Middle-aged Woman

How Do I Love Thee?

Even though I poke fun at my husband, I really do love him. I figure he must REALLY love me since he hasn't thrown me out of the house after my recent misadventures. With that in mind, I began to think of the many different ways that I show him I love him. I wanted to do an inventory for my own peace of mind.

Here's what I came up with:

1. I clean your nose hairs out of the bathroom sink.
2. I laugh at your 'not so funny' jokes the first hundred times I hear them (after that - no holds barred!)
3. I don't bother you when you watch every football game, football highlight show and football analysis show.
4. I pick-up your dirty underwear and socks from the bedroom floor - YUCK!
5. I tell you your man-boobs aren't THAT big.
6. I don't hold my ears when you sing along with the radio (I just put cotton in them!)
7. I know to leave the house whenever you start any home improvement project so you can swear and cuss freely.
8. I still love your tried and true sexual advances. Even your old standby, "Come here - I want to show you something."
9. I listen intently to your work stories even though they all start the same way - "A fat woman came over to me today , , ,
10. I don't complain when you sprint naked from the bathroom to the bedroom after taking a shower.

The order might need a little re-working, but otherwise, this is a pretty good list. In fact, I just may show it to him to remind him that I do love him. On second thought, he's better off not reading this. I'll just have to tell him I love him.