Mental Meanderings

Wordlessness

It's a strange feeling. Wordlessness. A sense of silence in the creative soul. My thoughts are running, I'm percolating, I have story (FoT) doing spiral staircases in my mind but I'm totally wordless. It's not like writers block. It's a sense of waiting instead of a sense of frustration or procrastination. Wordless...

In a way this feeling is rather relaxing. I've given myself a break to account for the school holidays and it's freeing to approach each day with no expectations. It's a good time to take a step back because I've gone over my past draft this past week and a half both in my mind and in my notes and I'm at about the half way mark building intensity into the novel. I've been noticing gaps and making annotations in preparation of the revision process and I need to nail down the remaining scene layout before proceeding.

I'm also still trying to lock in on my characters. In a way they're all solid but they lack a 3D element in my mind. I just can't FEEL them as fully as I'd like to. I'm not absorbed by them. It's part of what I've always had trouble with. When I was role playing (Dungeons and Dragons) I could lose myself in character. It made for some fun gaming because I'd jump up from my seat totally immersed in the role. But I can't seem to get that deep with the characters in my book. They don't fill me.

How do I find that point inside me where they come to life. Tori and Lucas have a story to tell. They're roles are vital and vibrant. Crey is screaming to be heard and Zara and Tempany have this residing pain that sort of floats there in ethereal expectation. But it's not enough. I THINK too much. How do I draw them out? How do I immerse myself in these characters so that I KNOW them? I need to be able to feel their actions and motivations coming into the scenes.

Meanwhile, it's all part of this wordlessness. I'm comfortable and there is another week of school holidays before my oldest returns to the grind for 10 weeks. Another week of watching the book run around in my mind and enjoying the way its filling out and becoming real. Another week of wordlessness...