Mental Meanderings

Basic Anti-Bullying

I was in the chat room earlier today when the topic of bullying came up. It made me wonder how many of us remember episodes of bullying in school or even throughout life. Does everyone feel like they've been a victim of bullying? Do those bullies ever look back and recognize their actions for what they were? Do they ever regret the way they acted in school? Do we all carry the wounds of growing up into today?

It's interesting reflecting on this sort of thing and trying to see where it affects who we've become. It makes me wonder about the lives of some of the other kids I've witnessed getting bullied and it makes me wonder if my innaction when it was going on is partly to blame.

Bullying is something that has happened for generations and I know we've all dealt with it at one point or another. I've heard of some very dangerous situations. We've seen the news about schoolyard incedents that have really escalated which were probably instigated by bullying. It makes me wonder if perhaps it's not being dealt with seriously enough.

As a mother I'm really concerned because my six year old has come home on occasion and told me about being picked on at school. It really comes to the fore when it's your own child facing the cruelty of other children. She's shy and sensitive as it is and I don't know what to tell her, what to teach her to give her the strength to face her taunters and deal with the situation.

I know teachers don't have eyes everywhere and most of the time they are doing the best they can. But then I hear of other situations, generally with older kids, when there are no consequences. These kids can get particularly nasty and they get away with it either because they don't get caught or they just get a warning. There is no one dealing with the situation and there has to be a way to keep things like this controlled.

Perhaps bullying and being bullied is all a part of growing up. If not for these little battles as kids would we grow up stronger and more able to face adversity as adults? Then again, it's because of these sorts of things our first walls against accepting others into our lives were errected.

I guess there really are no answers and no wonder bullying has continued generation after generation. I just don't like the idea of my kids, or any kids being hurt by these sorts of squabbles and facing the peer pressure that goes with it. I worry about where it will end up when kids are getting seriously hurt, weilding arms to school, getting violent and truly, sickeningly abusive. Is it escalating? Are bullies meaner and nastier then when I was a child?

What can I tell my daughter to help her find the inner strength to face bullies. I tell her to talk to her teachers. I tell her that she's perfect and beautiful and smart. But I don't know how to deal with bullies myself other than ignoring them. That only works to a degree as well. I just hope she comes through it with fewer scars then I did. *sighs*