Out of the Frying Pan

My favorite time of year MUHAHAHA

My wife, Cassie Reynolds forgot our camera at work again , so these are pictures from last year. But, most of it looks pretty much the same this year, so at least you get an idea of what our front porch and yard looks like around Halloween.

Starting with the front porch…

Dracula. This was one of my first creations. I made our friend Drac’s head from a Styrofoam wig stand and stuffed his body with fiberfoam. The coffin was cut from a single 4x8 sheet of plywood and Cassie Reynolds and I painted it, lined it with quilted fabric, and added trim and handles.

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Mummy. We have a second standing coffin on our front porch, this one houses a mummy just coming to life. The first picture was taken with a flash, the second one shows the purple lights that make the inside of the coffin glow.

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Frankenstein. Just outside our front porch stands Frankie, another of my early creations. Between Halloweens, Frank comes apart into three pieces (head, chest, and then torso & legs). Frankie stands a whopping seven feet tall.

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Knight. On the west side of the entrance to our driveway, a knight stands guard. I added this guy to my collection just last year.

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Scarecrow. Not your happy-go-lucky garden variety scarecrow, this big guy stands over six feet tall and has evil eyes which are hidden behind patches but light up after dark.

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Monster Poker Table. On the east side of the driveway, a trio of characters play a heated game of poker. The first picture is of the table after dark, the second is the Grim Reaper, who holds a straight flush and most of the chips. The dead-lookin’ old guy is Dead Ted, who doesn’t seem to mind whether he won or lost, but the screaming guy across from him must’ve lost pretty big during the last hand.

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Witch. The witch sits next to her cauldron, which (with green lights inside) spews a ghostly fog, powered by the fog machine behind her to her right. This is a special fog machine that I made… it sorta looks like an ice chest, probably because it is one. The fog runs through the middle of the ice chest (filled with ice), cooling it down before it is piped to the cauldron. What this does is make the fog spill over the edge of the cauldron and stay close to the ground, instead of dissipating upward into the air.

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Graveyard. Altogether, we have eight graves in our little family cemetery. The inscriptions include: ”T’was a frying pan that took his life, Wally Fitzsimmons, caught by his wife” and ”Here lies Bessie, dearly departed, she finally exploded cuz she never farted.” No, you can’t buy quality like that in a store… the wife and I made ‘em up.

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Lady Ghoul. This picture was taken with a flash, which doesn’t really give the full effect, since she’s usually illuminated by a colored spotlight from beneath. She is one creepy lady, hanging there behind the graveyard. Ask Cassie Reynolds how she reacted when I surprised her by hanging this particular ghoul in the hallway leading to our bedroom. Even though it scared the bejeebies out of her, it’s one of her favorites of my creations (maybe because I sold a couple of them on eBay a few years back and made several hundred dollars?)

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Bob. The first year that I put this goofy-looking creation out, one of the folks that came by to see our graveyard commented to a friend, “Hey, that guy looks just like Bob!” I dunno know who they were talking about, but we’ve called this guy Bob ever since. Last year, Bob appeared at our picnic table with a tasty snack. Notice the dungeon door in the background, a decoration that I made for a Halloween door-decorating contest at my wife’s work.

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Humphrey. Poor Humphrey has advanced kyphosis (curvature of the spine). He also has bad breath and is sadly in need of a comb, but he’s welcome at our house anyway.

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Spider Monster. Also one of my earliest creations, this is not your typical “spider man.” I’d never seen anything like this, so a few years back I assembled a couple of them and put them up for sale on eBay. They sold quickly but now I’m kicking myself because guess what I saw for sale this year in the Halloween aisle? Yep.

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Michael, Jason, and Freddy. Around our fountain are three movie stars. They will give autographs to visiting trick-or-treaters, but I think next year I’ll warn the little beggars that these guys only sign in blood. Oops.

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