Loving Someone

I will be waiting for you_7

Alone in her bed, Aria curled herself into a ball under the covers. She tried to banish the incident of this afternoon from her mind but failed.

How could she, when she could still feel Ryan's warm lips on hers. How could she, when every fiber of her being longed to recollect every touch, every caress.

Besides Ryan, another matter that was eating at her conscience was Meg. Her act from this afternoon was the same as a stab to her best friend's back, from Aria's point of view.

To think that Aria was the one Meg had confessed all her secret feelings to. On one hand, Aria was patiently and supportively listening to all her woes, while on the other hand, she was coveting her best friend's boyfriend.

At this thought, Aria had a strong urge to bang her head on the wall. She might as well just die, there's no worse punishment for a traitor like her. What a hypocrite.

Even as she was mentally punishing herself, part of her mind played back to Ryan's invitation to meet him after school. What was it that he needs so badly to talk about? A traitorous part of her secretly wished that Ryan meant to confess to have feelings for her too. However, the logical part of her reasoned, why should he do that. There's no way he could have feelings for her, the kiss was just a spur of the moment thing. Even as she reasoned that out, she refused to believe it.

All night, Aria tossed and turned on her bed, lamenting over whether or not to meet Ryan tomorrow. Before she knew it, morning arrived.

She went to school, walking like a zombie due to lack of sleep. All day, she kept looking around, trying to avoid meeting either Ryan or Meg. At her present state of mind, it was better for her not to confront anyone yet.

However, her effort proved to be a waste of time because she saw neither Ryan or Meg the whole day.

Aria's stomach churned as the clock ticked closer to the time when school ends. When the last bell rang, decision time arrived. As Aria cleared her things from her desk, she tried weighing the pros and cons of her decision. Friendship or love?

Suddenly, a vision of Ryan waiting for her in the garden filled her mind, pushing away all logical thinking. He had made Aria promise to go, he had said he would be waiting.

With that promise in her mind, she walked out of the classroom in a dreamlike trance. He will be waiting for me, was all Aria could think of. As she made her way to the meeting place, all she could think of was seeing Ryan again.

Suddenly, an arm went out and turned her around by her shoulder. Startled, Aria blinked her eyes, as if she had been awaken from a dream.

"I need to talk to you," Meg said, her voice unsteady, sounding very urgent.

Face to face with the person she was about to betray just moments before, Aria could do nothing but nod her head.

Silently, they walked to a bench beside a resting area for the students. They sat down, both quiet, as if they were both brooding over matters of the heart.

After a lengthy silence, Meg looked at Aria with imploring eyes, "Have I ever told you how Ryan and I met?"

Aria quietly shook her head.

A soft smile lit Meg's face, casting her face with a dreamlike quality, "Strange, that I never mentioned this." She leaned her head back, eyes casted up to the sky, "It was the first day of school during freshmen. He was the first person I sat next to in my first class. I remembered it was Algebra. He introduced himself, I was so shy to being noticed by such a good looking guy, that I could do nothing but nod my head in greeting. He smiled, in that way of his, as if to reassure me. He said that that's not the way it should be, after he introduced himself, I was supposed to do the same, not just nod my head. He said it so kindly, that I dropped my reserve."

Meg turned her head to look back at Aria, "I was a very shy person back then. Afraid of even my own shadow."

Aria was surprised by Meg's admission. She had never told Aria any of this before, and Meg certainly did not look like such a timid person. Aria wondered at what it was that had prompted this admission.

Aria was snapped out of her own thoughts when Meg continued, "We shared a lot of the same classes. We even joined the drama society together. He said that by joining the society, I could learn to build my self-esteem, and it would also be fun. By the end of the day, the thing that changed me was not the society, but Ryan. He was the one who prompted me to take the first step out of my protective shell, the one who taught me to smile just because the sun is out. He told me that though in life we might have more foes than friends, we should not be bothered by them, instead learn to appreciate what little friends we have. In fact, he taught me a lot on gratitude, appreciate the people around us, he said, be thankful that you're still you no matter what the circumstances. In fact, Ryan was more a teacher than a friend from the beginning."

She stopped for a moment. Then, with a far away look in her eyes, she said, "I fell in love the moment he first smiled at me." Meg blinked. The faraway look in her eyes suddenly cleared. Instead, determination set in. "I have been in love with Ryan for so long, there's no way he couldn't feel it. He must feel the same," the last line she added with a force.

"I won't let anyone destroy what we are supposed to have with each other," Meg said bitterly, and then she turned to Aria, her eyes hard, "not even..."

Meg turned her head away, as if she was angry at herself. She took a couple of breath, then said silently, "I'm sorry to have laid it out so strong. But I really need to let it all out." With an apologising look at Aria, she said, "I hope you understand."

Bewildered, Aria nodded her head.

After heaving a huge sigh, Meg smiled brightly, "Good! Now that it's all clear, I need to go look for Ryan." With a wink, she added, "I'm going to confess my feelings to him."

Meg got off the bench and began to walk away from Aria.

"Meg! Wait!" Aria shouted.

Meg halted her steps and turned around, looking at Aria quizzically.

Aria stuttered, "I... I know where Ryan will be." Gathering her courage, she spit it out, "He's at the garden by the back gate right this moment."

A pregnant pause went by before Meg grinned, "Thanks!" With that, Meg walked out of sight.

Sitting alone on the bench, Aria wallowed in her self pity. Part of her was mortified that Meg had known about her feelings all along. She also made it very clear that she won't let Aria stand in the way of her relationship with Ryan.

Aria groaned, how could she be so stupid. A guy like Ryan would never belong to a girl like her. He belonged to girls like Meg, girls who were confident and knew how to get what they wanted in life. Never people like Aria, who only knew how to dream, but never have the courage to pursue it.