Breathing Room

Missing my Mommy

I spent Mother's Day with Dave's family which was was nice but a little lonely (there goes that word again). I really like his family but at times I feel isolated because many times that we get together they spend a LOT of time reminiscing about the past. Which is fine because I love to do that with my family but for the girlfriends and extras in the group we can't remember. The thing is I'm the ONLY extra so I spend a lot of time hearing stories I've heard before or trying to understand the inside joke that's being told for the hundredth time that I still don't get nor understand why its funny.

Dave's little sis (she's 23) is pregnant, which I think I mentioned before but his 90 year old grandma just found out today in the restaurant and she was SO shocked! I mean she's 90, I understand she comes from another time, but this past Christmas when she found out that I was going home to Cali for X-Mas with my family about two days before she said she was shocked for the week about THAT so you can imagine her shock today. LOL

Dave hasn't even told her we moved in together almost a year ago. She thinks we live in the same apartment building on different floors. Not my idea, by the way.

Anywho, I missed my mom and family a lot because whenever we get together we have a really good time. I talked to mom this morning because she called to say she was on my time because she was in Atlanta with a BUNCH of my family for my cousin's graduation from Spelman an then they were all driving to South Carolina sometime this week for two more of my cousin's graduation. She wished I was with her. I wished I was with her...but its good to be missed and loved.

I sent an aunt of mine (my mom's second to youngest sister) a card and gift. I wrote her a little personal message because we had sort of fallen out over something sort of trivial but I always felt bad and guilty about it and up until now had never expressed that to her, so I'm sort of awaiting her response but telling myself at the same time that what counts is that she got my message but honestly I do hope to hear from her in some way.

I'm not quite ready to be a mother and I can't wait to be a mother, but either way I look forward to that day. I wish everyone a Happy Mother's Day!

p.s. yes I still call my mom, mommy