Life with an Addict

Survival

Living with a compulsive gambler, you learn to do what it takes to survive both mentally and physically.
I've been Blessed with the most incredible friends and family. They've always been there for me, to listen, to give me strength and to help fill the gap when my husband was absent for anything important in my life. They helped fill the emptiness when I was so lonely I could barely stand it.
Two years ago I lost my mother to cancer and within a month my husband was charged with robbery. Some thought I must have incredible strength to get through such a difficult time but in reality, I simply didn't have a choice, I had too many responsibilities. When the pain was so crippling, I just took one baby step at a time until it had passed and even now when I look back on it I wonder how or why I did it.
My friends were there every step of the way, they did more for me than anyone could even imagine. That's where I found my strength, and my will to live.
After the first few years of living with a compulsive gambler you learn that the simple things such as a carton of milk become a luxury. Material things become insignificant to you, when something breaks you learn to shop at yard sales and when you do find something you really need it's more exciting than winning the lottery. Money doesn't buy happiness, but if you have enough to pay your bills and buy groceries it does buy peace of mind.
We once bought a new car, our first "new" car in fifteen years. I was excited that day but I knew that we'd never be able to keep it. So I decided to enjoy it for however long I had it and didn't worry about what tomorrow would bring. We had it for a few months before we lost it and honestly, I wasn't a bit sad to see it go.