Where's the Silver Lining?

Funny Face: Attack Cat

Funny Face: Attack Cat

Many people have guard dogs, even attack dogs. Not us, though: No, we have an attack cat. Funny Face fancies himself as our protection, especially mine. He decided I was his person even before he officially became a member of the family.

Funny has always been jealous of Robert or anyone who came too close to me. If Robert sat by me, the cat would get between us and push against my husband, trying to move him away. Being the naughty man he is, Robert loved to tease Funny Face by reaching over me to pat my arm or something. Oh, if looks could kill - hmmm . . . maybe that’s why Robert is so ill. Just joking. If one of the grandsons hugs me when FF is around, the cat will growl and hiss at the boy the whole visit, but he has never tried to hurt any of them and will even let them pet him when not near me.

Then one day a few years ago, Robert was gone overnight for some reason. Funny Face, who sleeps by my feet, suddenly jumped to his feet, growling. He leaped from the bed and ran to the bedroom window, rumbling in his chest. He moved from the bedroom, down the hall, and to the living room, growling all the time. He rushed to the kitchen. I followed him, wondering what was wrong with the cat. Then someone stumbled over something in the back yard, yelped, and stumbled to the fence, and I heard something scramble over the fence and land on the other side. All this time, Funny Face growled. As soon the person was gone, the cat became quiet and returned to the bed. He already slept by the time I crawled under the covers again.

About a year later, we heard the yowling and hissing of a cat that’s in fight mode. Funny Face was outside, so Robert and I hurried to see if he were in trouble. Standing on the porch was a dog. Robert sat on the church bench on the porch area to see if he could read the dog’s tag. Out of the night leaped this ball of hissing, growling fur. Funny Face jumped between me and the dog and started to attack the poor, sacred animal between Robert’s knees. I scooped the cat into my arms and soothed him. He still growled and protested as I took him into the house.

A month or so later, a dog across the solid wood fence of the back fence barked at me. Funny Face went into attack mode and was going over the fence. I took him back into the house. My hero, my protector soon purred.

This morning, a hunting dog showed up in the front yard, a few links from a broken chain attached to her collar. Robert went out to see if the dog had a tag, and Funny Face slinked out the open door, pausing in the entry area we call a porch. When Robert came back into the house, the door still opened, the cat took a stance in the doorway, growling. Suddenly we heard the dog yipe. She had tried to come in the house, and Funny Face raked her nose. Then he came to me, his fur on end and his tail huge. He stood by my chair, watching the door, on guard. When Robert went out the back door, Funny Face took off after him, looking around to make sure Robert was okay.

Yes, some people have guard dogs, even attack dogs. Not us, no, we have an attack cat.