It matters becuase?...

If I could fall into the sky...

I guess in some sense, I'm ...evolving? I'm listening different music than before (stuff like Linkin' Park in lieu of Country). I'm able to relax at night. I'm reading more. I'm THINKING before I joke (Now THERE"S a true difference!)

I guess it could be because I'm cut off from most of my pals. Once again, I'm back to evolving and adapting to my level of companionship. I'm getting used to the rude next-door neighbors again (but that's another story), the constant annoyance and no respect from my brothers, and Varrying levels of pain, sleep and boredom. Don't ask about the last one, 'cuz I'll explain...er...no...

I'm also reforming old habits. Such as not even TRYING to go to sleep before midnight and not TRYING to move until 10... AM!! Not PM... I could NEVER sleep that long. I'm also back to swimming, and stretching out on the grass(or roof) to soak up the rays of a blinding Texas sun. Yeah, after a week of pure torture at the hands of boredom, I'm back to being myself.. kinda.. sorta.. in a way... er... uh.. never mind...

Adapting though I am, I have the good and the bad, and the worse to go through soon.

The Good, I get a weekend without my brothers.

The bad, I'm getting shipped to Tennessee for a while with a loud group of 'friends' and their parents, without contact to my true friends!

The worse, by the time I get back, I'll be a total wreck. I'll have not written, drawn or talked to my true friends in forever, and thus will have sunken into depression again.

Well, what else is new?

"Dr. Dr. won't you please perscribe me something? I'm a hazard to myself. I don't wanna be my friend no more, I wanna be somebody else"