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A collection of stories about my family's trip to the movies going sour quite fast! |
It was Sunday, August 25th, 2024, and you have just gotten out of jail! Unfortunately, because of the fact that you are still not wanted BACK IN YOUR OWN HOME, you begrudgingly started to head back to the homeless shelter... After you arrived back at the shelter, you would remember that AEW is having another show tonight, "All In!" You would plead with the lady to PLEASE let you watch the show, but she won't let you because for one, they aren't allowed to go to certain channels on the TV sets, and two, PPVs are not allowed at the Homeless Shelter! You got so mad that you just wanted to sock it to her, but instead, decided to make a video to bitch about it on Facebook. Since there was nothing for you to watch on any of the TVs at the homeless shelter, you would let out a big sigh and start to head to your room... While in your room, you would be kept up late into the night by all of your "neighbors!" Once again, you decided to bitch and moan about it in a video on Facebook. The next day, on August 26th, 2024, you would get called over to your wife's house...you found out that your wife wants to celebrate her birthday with you! Overjoyed with this, you would happily call up an Uber and would ride over to your house! After you arrive at the house, you would see your wife wearing a very expensive looking dress! You ask her why she is wearing such an expensive dress, and she tells you that she wants you to treat her to a meal at a fancy restaurant! Your heart sank upon hearing this, as you didn't quite have enough money to make this happen! Instead, you would drive her in the family's SUV and take her to a place that is MUCH MORE affordable...a Burger King... Your wife would give you an evil look at first, but doesn't say anything at the moment... You two would order up some burgers and proceeded to go to your table. As your wife digs into a greasy burger, you would pull out a birthday card and writes some things on it. After she finishes her burger, she would happily take your birthday card. Upon reading it, she would give you another ugly look! "Happy Birthday Karen, now please let me back into the fucking house you fucking whore!" After reading this card, you would be hoping that she would let you finally stay at the house! However, as soon as you got to her house, she would finally decide to give you a piece of her mind! You would profusely ask for forgiveness, but she would just chuck the hat at you and slams the door on your face! You would snap and look around for something to break, but not wanting to go back to jail so soon, you would just let out another big sigh before you would call up Uber again and ride back to the homeless shelter... Back at the shelter, you would cry yourself to sleep, wishing that your wife would just show a LITTLE BIT of mercy on you! Things would be going normally until the morning of August 28th, 2024, you would be in a deep sleep with a huge grin on your face! You would be having a wonderful dream about how you were walking back to your home, and instead of giving you shit again, your wife would run out of the house and hugs you tight, welcoming you back home and apologizing for being a royal bitch to you! Your kids would also hug on you tight as they have missed you as well! You would then march into the TV room and turn on some Fortnite! Instead of having one losing streak after another, you would actually be kicking ass left and right in Fortnite for once! While you are kicking ass in Dreamland, the lady that runs the homeless shelter would walk into the kitchen and notices the mess you made while fixing breakfast! Furious with the mess, the crazy woman would devise a sinister plan to wake you up... Shaken up from the wake-up call, you would quickly pick up a broom and start to clean up the kitchen as she continues to yell at you! Another couple of days would pass and on August 30th, 2024, You would find out that Ross is going back to the International Movie Theater! You would get quite cranked up over this and, because you didn't have a PS5 to play on to kick ass in Fortnite with, you decided to storm the kitchen and look for something to help eat your feelings up with! You would then see it in the fridge...the most delicious looking strawberry cheesecake you have ever seen! You would be quick to eat up the whole cheesecake before you would head to your room with a big smile on your face! Hours later, while you are taking a nap, the crazy woman would be walking into the kitchen to get a slice of cheesecake...only to see that the whole thing is gone! "WHAT THE FUCK?!? WHO THE FUCK ATE MY GODDAMN CHEESECAKE?!?" Another hour or two would go by and you would still be asleep! Soon, you would wake up and start to head to the bathroom... Just as you walk into the bathroom, the crazy lady would finally discover who the culprit is that ate her cheesecake! "THAT FAT FUCK ATE MY CHEESECAKE?!? OH HELL NO, THAT SHIT ISN'T GOING TO FLY! SOMEONE COME WITH ME, IT'S TIME TO TEACH THIS FAT ASS WHO RUNS THIS GODDAMN JOINT!" She and her goons would then stomp down the hallway and wait outside of the bathroom door as you finish up your business... Before you could explain yourself, the goons would proceed to jump on you and proceed to beat the shit out of you! That night, you would fall asleep with a black eye and bruises all over your body! The next day, on August 31st, 2024, you would wake up to some horrible news! Apparently, one of your nieces would be at a convenient store, trying to get a refund on something, but instead of getting a refund, she would be given a free trip to jail instead! As the day goes on, you would eventually find out that Ross is trying to see a horror movie again! You would get upset with this and would try to get a Uber ride, but your card wouldn't go through due to it being maxed out! You would then let out a huge sigh as you leave the homeless shelter on foot. You would soon walk pass the church your family would go to! However, before you could get much further, a cop would spot you and starts to follow you, thinking you are up to no good! You would attempt to throw the cop off and try to sleep in a secluded area at the church, hoping the cop would go away! As you get taken to a jailhouse, Ross's roommate would post the following video to your latest Facebook post: |