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Rated: XGC · Book · Dark · #2321970
A collection of stories about my family's trip to the movies going sour quite fast!
#1075701 added August 25, 2024 at 12:53pm
Restrictions: None
A trip to the Movies gone bad! - Don't Blink Twice
It was August 19th, 2024, and you have just gotten out of jail! You couldn't believe that the cops would arrest you just for trying to defend your wife! As you settle down next to the stinking creek again, you would start to think up ways of trying to win your wife back and, more importantly, win your way back into YOUR OWN HOME! You then get an idea you know is a SURE FIRE WAY to let you back into the house!

The next day, on August 20th, 2024, you would call up your sister and ask if she has some money. She would ask why and you tell her that not only do you need a bit of food, but you need to buy your wife...a new PS5...
Your sister would justifiably get upset and asks if you have any idea how much all of this is going to cost! You tell her that it would be worth it because you MISS YOUR WIFE, YOUR HOME, AND YOUR FORTNITE GAMING SESSIONS!
After some coaxing, you manage to talk your sister into going by an Ihop and getting yourself a good helping of pancakes!


After getting a huge fill of pancakes, you and your sister would make your next stop...at a Wal-Mart to get your wife a new PS5!


You would successfully find a new PS5 and would have your sister purchase it before leaving the store triumphantly!
As your sister drive you back to your house, you would be giddy with excitement! You couldn't wait to hook up the PS5 and play some Fortnite again! You would then hop out of your sister's car and happily march along the front porch of your house with PS5 in hand! As soon as your wife opens up the door, you would present your offering with great joy!

"Oh, a new PS5! Thank you honey! Now please leave the property and..."
"But, but, you said that as soon as I got you a new PS5, you would let me back into the house and..."
"Yeah well, I changed my mind, now please leave and..."
"BUT YOU SAID THAT AS SOON AS I GOT YOU THE FUCKING PS5, YOU WOULD LET ME BACK INTO THE HOUSE! NOW LET ME THE FUCK BACK IN, OR I SWEAR ON MY FATHER'S URN, I WILL..."
"AND I FUCKING TOLD YOU I CHANGED MY FUCKING MIND! NOW FUCKING LEAVE OR I WILL CALL THE GODDAMN COPS!!!"

She would then slam the door on your face! You would then be tempted to break something, but think twice about it before you would let out a big sigh and start to slowly walk back off the front porch...
Your sister would ask how things went and you told her the bad news...She would then get mad and tells you that you owe her for the Ihop food and the PS5! You tell her that you have no money, but she gives you another solution...mowing her yard!
You snap and tell her that you are ABOVE mowing lawns, but she would be quick to tell you that you either mow her yard or let your wife send you back to jail! You would let out another big sigh before agreeing to your sister's term...
At your sister's home, you would start up the lawn mower and begin to mow the lawn as the heat picks up...
Lardo mowing a lawn after eating a lot of pancakes & buying a PS5 with his sister's money!

As you continue to mow the lawn, you would start to bitch and moan, wishing that your wife was true to her word and not be a BACK STABBING BITCH!


After an hour or two of mowing the lawn in this horrible heat, you would ask your sister if she is happy with the lawn and would let you stay at her house...and yes, even though she likes what you did with the lawn, she STILL wouldn't let you into her house! You snap at your sister and yell and cuss up a storm before grabbing your bags and storming off down the road in a furious rage...

On August 22nd, 2024, you would be moping under a bridge again while sitting near the stinking creek. As you sit there and mope, you would make another video for Facebook to bitch about it!


Eventually, the heat would be too much for you and you decided to make plans to go somewhere...a place that you thought you would never go to in a million years...a goddamn homeless shelter...

On August 23rd, 2024, you would arrive at the homeless shelter, where the lady running the place immediately starts to give you shit! This was the same homeless place where that bastard brother Ross dropped off about 25 lbs of rice at during a food drive! You remember this lady being ever so grateful to Ross for this! However, the kindness she showed to Ross back then is NOWHERE to be seen here! She looks down at you with disgust before talking shit about you and how you amount to nothing compared to Ross!
Throughout the day, this lady, as well as a few of the other homeless men there, would keep giving you hassle and occasionally bust out laughing whenever something humiliating happens to you!
That night, you would manage to smuggle in some candy and begin to munch on them to try to relieve yourself of anxiety and stress, but unfortunately, you would get caught by the mad woman!


You would then cry yourself to sleep that night, deprived of your right to satisfy your midnight munchies!

On Saturday, August 24th, 2024, you would be woken up by some bad news! For one, you would find out that Ross is seeing another horror movie!


Also, apparently, last night, your mother would be on another rampage and would be caught trying to climb a barbed wire fence that was surrounding a business owned and operated by an Indian family! Cops would be called quickly to get her off the fence!


Are you fucking kidding? First they injure your mother and now they are locking her up in the pokey! Oh, this fucking tears it!!!
You would get a ride back to your house where you stormed back onto the porch and banged on the front door. You would keep banging on the door before your wife would angrily open it up!
"What the Hell are you doing here? And why do you fucking stink?!?"
"Yeah well, I haven't bathed for a while, and the homeless shelter's shower rooms are off limits because of the fucked up plumbing, but listen, I did what you asked, so please let me back in and..."
"Sorry, that's not going to happen, now please leave and..."
"FUCKING BITCH, LET ME BACK INTO THIS GODDAMN HOUSE OR I SWEAR TO GOD ON MY FATHER'S URN, I WILL FUCK SHIT UP AND...
"AND I FUCKING TOLD YOU THAT I'M NOT LETTING YOU IN! NOW GET YOUR STINKING ASS OFF OF THE PORCH BEFORE I CALL THE GODDAMN COPS!!!"

As soon as she slams the door into your face again, you would royally snap and slip into a form of mania where you go berserk and strip yourself of all of your clothing! You would then pick up a random rock and chuck it at a window smashing it! You would then pick up a piece of glass and begin to chew on it, causing your wife to get freaked out and call the cops on you!


After you put your orange jumpsuit on and put into your jail cell, you would get news that Ross and his psychopathic friend would get kicked out of the movies that night! Apparently, the two have caused a stink in the movie theater lobby, which caused them to get thrown out!
After hearing about this, you would smile big as you curl up on a cot and go to sleep...
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