Complex Numbers

Some Clouds Are Just Clouds

This one's from Forbes, and to me is an exercise in suppressing my confirmation bias, because it's saying the same shit I've been saying, only by an actual mental health professional.

   A Psychologist Explains ‘Oppressive Optimism’—And The Toxic Side Of Self-Care  

Being a professional in a field doesn't mean you're always right; thinking that's the case would be another fallacy. Still, I think the article is worth contemplating. Whether my comments are is an open question.

Self-care has become a buzzword in wellness culture and for good reason—it’s essential for our mental, emotional and physical health.

Assertion without evidence can also be a problem.

These practices can work wonders, but when chasing positivity turns into an obsession—it can lead to what researchers call “toxic positivity.”

Which I've ragged on in here before, repeatedly... though not so much as to have exhausted my patience with the topic.

In essence, toxic positivity invalidates negative experiences by promoting the idea that one should always maintain a sunny outlook, regardless of circumstances.

I believe I've used examples of that before like "My dog died." "That's great! Now you can get a new puppy!"

Here are three specific examples of how self-care can slip into toxic positivity and end up doing more harm than good.

As this is not Cracked, the list actually counts up.

1. The Social Media Mantra—“Good Vibes Only”

While surrounding oneself with positivity can be uplifting, the insistence on “good vibes only” creates an environment where negative emotions are not just unwelcome but are seen as personal failings.

I'm not sure this is so much an insistence on toxic positivity as a desire to not get your own vibes harshed. Like, you're at a party, and everyone's having a great time, and one of your friends staggers in late and bleeding. "Got in a wreck," she moans. Normally, you'd probably be there for your friend, call an ambulance for her, maybe even wait in the ER with her. But you're at a party. How dare someone turn it into an emergency!

2. Oppressive Optimism—“Everything Happens For A Reason”

I've railed against that duck-billed platitude before, and I'll do it again.

Optimism is crucial when coping with negativity...

Another assertion without evidence.

...but the belief that everything happens for a reason can invalidate genuine feelings of fear and uncertainty.

This is related to "it's all part of God's plan," though that one's more specific to certain religious people.

3. Affirmation Overload—“I Am Strong, I Can Handle Anything”

Picture someone going through a tough divorce, constantly telling themselves, “I am strong” and “I can handle anything” to keep up their confidence and stay positive. While this might seem helpful, it might stop them from sharing their pain and struggles with loved ones, out of fear that admitting vulnerability will make them look weak or uncertain about their decision.

And maybe that no one wants to be around them if they're not going to give off good vibes.

There's not much more to the article, really; the conclusion boils down to "seek help," which is fine advice, but what I'd need help with would be finding a shrink. Too much work. I'll just stay over here and be grumpy by myself.