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A collection of stories about my family's trip to the movies going sour quite fast! |
It was Monday, July 8th, 2024, and you have just gotten out of jail. Not only that, but you have also gotten the news about Ross...sleeping with...another skank...from the International Movie Theater... You became so upset with the news that the first thing that popped into your mind was ordering a truck load of big macs! However, you fear that this wasn't going to cut it this time...instead, you decided to get something that is much stronger...BOOZE! After downing a whole bunch of booze, you decided to make a video to post on social media, showing how upset you are with Ross! The next day, on July 9th, 2024, you would be woken out of your drunken stupor by your wife! Apparently, there is something in the family SUV that is stinking to high heavens! As you walk outside towards the SUV, you finally remember what was causing the stench...it was all those chicken strips you have ordered from Raising Cane's! You try to hold your breath as you open up the SUV doors... After throwing out the spoiled chicken strips, your wife would yell at your for a good hour or two before you start trying to air out the family SUV... The rest of the week would be uneventful as you spend it cleaning, and airing, out the family SUV of anymore fowl chicken strips! Things would be pretty peaceful until Friday... On Friday, July 12th, 2024, you would find out that Ross is seeing another horror movie! Are you fucking kidding? HE JUST SAW ONE EARLIER TODAY! However, not wanting to go back to jail so soon, instead of going over to Ross's house to try to beat his ass, you and your wife would head to McDonald's instead...and order up quite a bit of food! After paying for it and picking up a bunch of food, you and your wife would proceed to devour it all like the pigs you are! After packing away about $80 worth of McDonald's slop, you and your wife would fall asleep happily in your bed! However, on the next day, July 13th, 2024, you would get some bad news again! Apparently, your mother, who is flat broke thanks to the greedy utility companies, went to a seafood restaurant, ate some food, and fled without paying! As she was trying to flee, some cops would catch up to her and arrest her! Upset with this news, your niece would haul it over and tries to save her granny! Unfortunately, she would get pulled over and ticketed by the cops! However, because of all of her citations, they ended up having to tow her vehicle...she did not take the news well... Infuriated with all of this, you would get into the SUV and drive over to the next town to where that bastard Ross is! As you drive further into town, you would start to get a bit hungry...too bad there isn't a McDonald's nearby...but there is a grocery store! However, whenever you tried to get in, some asshole manager would tell you that you have been trespassed and not to come back! You ask what the fuck did he mean and he bought up the time you were caught shoplifting food...because you were broke from having to pay the utility bills...greedy bastards... You would tell the manager off before you storm off to another location...a Pizza Hut! However, just after you pick up this piping hot goodness, a cop would approach you...apparently, that asshole manager DID call the cops on you! Are you fucking kidding?!? HOW DARE THAT FUCKING PIG THROW OUT YOUR PIZZA LIKE THAT!!! YOU PAID GOOD MONEY FOR THAT!!! As you continue to yell and cuss out the cop over pizza while he drives you off to jail, Ross's roommate would post the following video to your latest Facebook post: |