Wonderland 2024

G-2. Paint the White Roses Red

PROMPT ▼

Mistakes happen. Some beyond our control. Create a blog entry (or static item) telling of such a time(s) that has happened and what you did to rectify the situation (if any). (<1000 words)

This "mistake beyond my control" scenario actually just recently played itself out at our church. For reasons and motivations that are still largely unknown, our (female) associate pastor accused our (male) lead pastor of essentially toxic leadership and gave our church board an "it's either him or me" ultimatum. The "mistake" part of the whole thing is that the church board didn't ask any questions, formally investigate the allegations, or make any attempt to encourage reconciliation or otherwise addressing the associate pastor's concerns; they effectively just told the lead pastor that there was no way to fix it, and he needed to go.

In the couple of months since this all happened, the church has suffered catastrophic losses as a result. Half the staff (myself included) either resigned in protest or quit in the aftermath of the board's handling of the situation. Over half of the congregation (my family included) have stopped attending. Their revenue is down by 60%, and the board itself has had to issue a public apology to the church about their poor handling of the situation.

There wasn't anything I could do to rectify this situation, although it was certainly not for lack of trying! At the end of the day, the church board refused to believe that their actions and choices were flawed and resulted in people getting hurt, and the people who saw differently (which is a much larger number than I think anybody anticipated) no longer attend or support that church.

What I'm personally doing to rectify the situation is walk through this difficult season with our lead pastor, who lost not only his job but his family's entire church community in this. They're grieving deeply for the loss and aren't sure where to go or what to do next, so my family and I have decided that the best thing we can do in the meantime while they figure it out is walk alongside the people who were hurt by the church and who the church doesn't seem to feel any obligation to support.

Church drama and church hurt aren't things that are by any means new, but it is the first time my family and I have been directly affected by it, and one of the few times where it seems like all of it can be traced back to a fundamental mistake in how the situation was handled. When one employee files a formal complaint against another employee (and especially a supervisor), that complaint deserves and requires a full vetting to get the whole story and then take appropriate action. When you make assumptions and then decisions based on those assumptions, people end up getting hurt and feeling slighted, way more than if you had arrived at your decision after a thorough investigation and a formal process of discernment.


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(469 words)