Perpetual Ruminations

What People Say

In a recent comment I was reminded of what other people sometimes say without knowledge of the person they talk about. This was what I was facing many years ago.

I quit high school after a bad, almost fatal accident. But, once I began to heal and had time to think, I decided that I would go back to school and finish. The situation was, however, I couldn't return to my hometown school because of the problems that lead me to quit in the first place. Back in those days, there was no open enrollment, so this created a problem. The solution was, I would stay with family friends in a small community who's school was willing to over look the resident situation.

Changing schools in high school is tough, and to finish, I needed to be tougher. So, with an attitude adapted from my Dad, I handled the problems and completed high school. What was the attitude, and phrase my Dad used? "I don't give a rats ass what they think!" This type of an attitude soon resulted in many people talking about me, except for a few friends who actually knew me. Why didn't I try and change other peoples attitudes towards me? Because, for one, I was very introverted, and two, it meant most people just left me alone.

After high school, I served some time in the military. Upon my discharge, I returned to the small town I had finished high school in only because my wife of the time insisted we live there. After time passed, we divorced, but since I had three teenagers I was now raising that had only attended the local school, I stayed for them. But, as the years passed, more and more of my fellow townspeople seemed to adopt an idea of me being anti social (introverts are), of having a temper (I do, and I do not like people infringing where they are not welcome), and being ruthless. This stemmed from certain individuals that thought they could bully me and/or my kids. There were even a few who didn't like how I lived and would start a fight.

Let's just say that I don't like violence, but if someone starts something, I don't back down, either. I also will make a stand for what I believe in, even if it does result in someone else taking a pop at me. My Mom did try and teach me the "turn the other cheek" rule, but I never seemed to master that one. Being this way meant my share of fights, and being as stubborn as I am, it also meant that I may take a beating, but the other took worse.

This, in time, resulted in most of the town believing I was someone best left to self, an idea I fully enjoyed and ensured would stick. Except for a few people I called friends, no body realized, or maybe refused to believe, I had a kind heart and was in fact just the opposite of the what was rumored.