Mirror

Learning to Pray

As a young child being raised in a Catholic home, my prayers consisted of memorized prayers from school or church and saying the rosary and novenas. Years later as a young adult my only experience with prayer was limited to a repetitive “wish list”. The words just came out as a sort of ritual before bedtime...with no emotion, thought, or idea that God had a will for my life that may or may not have included anything on my “wish list”. I see now that I wasn’t really praying.

What was lacking in those early days was reverence for God. I had gratitude, and fear of God (the unhealthy kind), but not reverence. I grew up being taught that God was an angry God not the loving, caring God I know today. As a result, in my mind, answered prayer was directly related to my actions even if I was praying for someone else. I also felt that God was unreachable and too big to understand. It was hard for me to imagine that He had a plan for me, or anyone else in my life, with an invitation to communicate with Him through prayer:

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”

Matthew 7:7-8 NIV

In his book, Praying Like Monks, Living Like Fools: An Invitation to the Wonder and Mystery of Prayer, Tyler Staton encourages us to remember who we’re talking to when we pray:

“...remember who God is, remember who you are, remember who we are to each other”.

My prayer life today is much different than when I was younger. I know who God is, who I am, and who we are to each other: God is my Father; I am His child and He loves me unconditionally. That will never change. I can come to Him in prayer and know that He hears me. I know He loves me and when a prayer is unanswered, it’s because He knows what I don’t know, and sees what I don’t see. As I look back on my life, there are so many times that if God had given me everything I prayed for, I would not have the peace I feel today.

My prayers also include intercessory prayer which can only come from removing myself from the picture and placing the people I’m praying for in God’s capable loving hands.

Although I’ve spoken about the Lord many times to my children, they have not accepted Him into their lives. I pray every day He puts someone in their lives they will listen to...not just for the sake of being saved, but also for the beautiful experience of walking with the Lord here on earth. Until then, I can show by my actions what it is to live with Jesus by my side. I pray with anticipation that the day will come when they know Him and accept Him into their lives. In His time...in His Way.

"Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath!"

Psalm 116:2 (NLT)