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Rated: XGC · Book · Dark · #2276445
A collection of stories about my family's trip to the movies going sour quite fast!
#1042229 added December 27, 2022 at 1:04am
Restrictions: None
A trip to the Movies gone bad - Avatar: The Way of Water p.2
It was December 26, 2022, and you are still furious at that asshole Ross for what he did during Christmas! As you and your fiance` wake up in your hotel rooms, it dawned on you that if you don't find a way to come up with some money and fast, you would be in big trouble before you could even start working! Thankfully, a family has invited you over to eat in their house since...the utility companies decided to be...greedy...at this time of year!

Some time after that bastard left for that stupid Indian movie on Christmas eve, the electricity and the water got cut off at your household as well as a couple of others, including the one you are staying at! Because those greedy bastards cared more about money than their customers, THEY WOULD RATHER FREEZE US TO DEATH, THAN HAVE MERCY DURING THE HOLIDAYS! Thanks to those monsters, you couldn't cook the ham and turkey! OH NO, YOU HAD TO DO SOME SERIOUS DOWNGRADING! For starters, you know those trays full of meat, cheese, and crackers that those stores sell? Well guess what, they went from APPETIZER to THE MAIN COURSE!


Then of course, your sister comes over with a pot full of "lil' smokies", but since you have no power, you had to put the pot over a CAMPFIRE, AND COOK IT LIKE THE CAVEMEN DID!


Oh, and did we forget to mention that the WATER GOT CUT OFF?!? GUESS WHAT THAT MEANS?!? HAVING TO "POP-A-SQUAT" BEHIND THE BUSHES...LIKE A GODDAMN DOG!


Unreal, ALL BECAUSE THOSE UTILITY COMPANIES DEMANDED MORE MONEY AND DIDN'T GIVE A RAT'S ASS ABOUT YOUR NEED FOR SOME MOONSHINE!
However, just as the party goes as smoothly as possible, you see your asshole brother Ross on Twitter, taking jabs at the situation...
Bought to you by imbeciles who think that NOT paying the utility bills IS A GOOD IDEA!

Your brother would begin to post images just like this one, poking fun of this TOTALLY TRAGIC AND TOTALLY UNPREVENTABLE EVENT!
They love it so much that they would leave bills unpaid just to get some!

Ok, this is getting ridiculous now, IF HE DECIDES TO POST ONE MORE PICTURE, YOU SWEAR ON YOUR FATHER'S URN...
A simple question for my Moonshine loving family.

OK, THAT TEARS IT! AS SOON AS YOU SOBER UP AFTER THE HOLIDAYS, YOU ARE GOING TO SHOW THAT BASTARD WHAT FOR!

Fast forward to today, the 26th of December, and you are on your way to this new movie theater. This new theater supposedly plays some movies in Cinemark XD format and that's what that bastard watched the movie in! As you pull up to the theater and pull out your wallet... you notice there is only one problem...YOU HAVE NO GODDAMN FUCKING MONEY! Your fiance` sees your wallet is empty and suggests they just call it a day and move on! Then, a crude idea pops in your head! You take out your pocket knife and begin to...cut pubes off of your crotch! Your fiance` would get grossed out and asks what the flying Hell you are doing and you say, "Look, a lot of people who work here are just high school students joining the work force for the first time, they won't know what to fucking do with this!" You then collect your um, "money", place it into a pouch and proceed to take it to the ticket stand...

At the ticket stand, a very young looking kid with glasses asks what you want and before he could do much else, you pull out the pubes, and the awkward silence begins.

The worker at the ticket stand would awkwardly stare at you and the pubes for quite some time before he says, while quite grossed out, "Sir, are those...your...pubes?!?" You tell him that yes, it is your pubes, and that in your country they are used as currency. Of course, the dorky kid doesn't buy it and says we don't take pubes!


You then tell the dorky kid that in this day and age, discrimination is AGAINST THE LAW NOW, AND HE SHOULD NOT DISCRIMINATE AGAINST A COUNTRY, JUST BECAUSE OF THEIR ODD CHOICE OF CURRENCY! You two would argue more until the kid says, "Even if I COULD sell you those tickets, I couldn't do it ANYWAYS, because we are sold out of ALL AVATAR TICKETS FOR THE DAY!" At that point, you quickly grab your pubes and run off...while showing the dorky kid your 'freedom finger' of course...

As you storm back into your vehicle, you begin to punch random things out of a fit of rage before your fiance` manages to calm you down! You two would then head back to the Red Roof Inn where you boot up your laptop and rent "Clerks 3"


After you watched the movie, you go online and tell people that Clerks 3, IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER, AND THAT THE AVATAR MOVIE IS SHIT, EVEN THOUGH YOU ONLY SAW THE TRAILER! You are quickly called out on your bullshit, which causes you to storm off and hop into a Jacuzzi...but not before popping open a bottle of Moonshine to sip on first!
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