Ten Forward

Klingon Bloodwine

Klingon Bloodwine

3 slices Serrano pepper
8-10 blueberries
1 1/2 oz vodka
3/4 oz simple syrup
3/4 oz lemon juice
4 oz red wine

Muddle pepper slices with blueberries. Add vodka, syrup, and lemon juice. Top with wine. Shake with ice and strain into a rocks glass. Qa'pla!

(Yes, I know this image shows a wine glass, not a rocks glass. You use what you got.)

Notes:

We're going by a line from Worf in a later episode of DS9: "I like my bloodwine young and sweet." Double entendres aside, that's the basis for the sweet aspect of this recipe.

Simple syrup involves equal volumes of water and white granulated sugar (say 1 cup of each), heated to dissolve and then cooled to supersaturation. Make a batch and leave it in a sealed container in the stasis device (fridge) for later. Or do what my lazy ass does and buy prebottled simple syrup at the liquor store.

A collaborative effort, the thought process for this one was a little like this: It should be based on actual wine, specifically red wine. But being Klingon, there needs to be an element of suffering involved, so you have to use hot peppers, the hottest you can stand. More on this later. It also needs to be stronger than Terran wine, something that a Klingon could chug and a human could choke down while pretending to be Klingon. Hence, fortification with a distilled spirit. At the same time, it can't taste entirely like ass, because that would defeat the purpose, which is to enjoy drinking; if it tastes like a Denebian mudworm's droppings, you're not going to want to drink it again.

As for the pepper, you can use whatever fits your personal tolerance for spice. Jalapeno can work. Or habanero. So can ghost pepper or Carolina reaper, if you're a true Klingon. It might take some experimentation (even Klingons have scientists) to get the right balance; the idea is to give it a kick but not to cause a warp plasma leak in your mouth.

For the wine, I recommend a dry but strong red, such as a cabernet sauvignon, merlot, or shiraz. I also recommend using cardboardeaux (my name for boxed wine). I'm not saying it's terrible; I'm saying it's cheap and it's not exactly Château Picard. If you use terrible wine, again, you won't want to drink more.

I once made this with a shot of prebottled lemon simple syrup instead of a mixture of simple and lemon juice, and it turned out fine.