Short Stories and poems

Dragon's Hibachi

A woman finds herself in a strange restaurant.

Sam was rather surprised. One moment, she’d been walking along a sandy beach, wearing little more than her two-piece pink-and-white swimsuit, and the next, she was falling down, until she hit what felt like a metallic surface. Then, she saw that there were several large reptilian creatures looking at her, seeming to be amused. Stranger still, they were wearing what seemed to be business suits.

That was when she heard something else, causing her to turn her head, catching sight of yet another reptilian creature, wearing an outfit that put her in mind of one of those Japanese steakhouse cooks, the sort that put on a big show preparing food for the customers. That one, had a look of concern in their eyes. That was when she noticed what they had in their hand – a spatula. That was when she also noticed other things, like the pile of rice not too far from her, and the fact that her back was feeling like it was starting to burn.

It was in that moment, the Chef, as that was what he seemed to be to Sam, made a move that probably saved her life, when they used the spatula to flip her into the air, onto the pile of rice. The Chef then made a motion with a claw, which Sam interpreted to mean, “Stay there!”

The Chef’s hands moved at a blinding speed, as his free hand picked up several items, along with a knife. From her, currently, safe position, Sam watched as the Chef prepared them. She also realized that she was in the perfect position to see something else – a woman that bore a passing resemblance to herself jumping from a hole in the ceiling, onto the Chef’s hat, or rather the depression in it. Then, she saw what looked to be a rope ladder lowering itself, so that it was in the center of the hat.

That was when the Chef used the spatula to flip her up into the air again. This time, she landed in the middle of the hat. The woman that was there helped her to the ladder, so that she could hold on.

“Wait until Zhou distracts the customers with the Saka part, so that you can climb up unnoticed,” they said.

“What about you?” Sam asked.

The woman grinned. “I do this sort of stuff for a living. I’ll probably part of some lucky customer’s fried rice mound.”

“But that means that you’ll get eaten!” Sam exclaimed.

“Happens all the time,” said the woman.

That was when Zhou got out the Saka, and started doing some fire-breathing tricks with it.

“Hurry,” the woman said. “It will take the customers’ eyes a little while to stop seeing flashes of flames. Now move.”

Sam started climbing up, helped by the fact that someone up above was pulling the ladder. When she finally got to the top, Sam was helped up by some folks that looked like they were wearing bacon, or something similar. She blinked, and looked back down at the woman on Zhou’s hat – her outfit, which not only resembled her own, also looked to be made of bacon. She then looked at the other people.

“What’s with the bacon?” she asked.

“Luckily for pulling this deception off, the customers wanted humans wrapped in bacon,” one said, as he cleaned off a knife. “Thanks to a little bit of work, Susan should fool them into thinking that you were her the whole time.” He then pressed his ear. “The Portal Jumper is safe. Proceed with the rest of the show.”

“Show?” Sam asked.

“Teppanyaki,” the man said. “You might call it Hibachi cooking. Zhou not only cooks the meal, he puts on a show to entertain customers, with some help from us.”

Sam looked, and watched as Zhou started something with an egg, which he flipped up into the air, only to split it in half with the spatula, the yolk and whites landing on the rice. He then tapped the side of his head, as if he was forgetting something. As if figuring it out, he snapped his fingers, and knocked his hat forward, causing Susan to tumble out, onto the egg and rice pile. Sam then watched as Susan was buried in the concoction by Zhou.

“He’s going to kill her!” Sam exclaimed.

“Yes, just as he has every time she’s part of the show,” the man said. “Just as he’s killed me, and every last one of the human staff. But, as you can see, we’re okay.”

“How?” Sam asked.

“Reformation technology basically,” the man said. “I don’t understand all of it myself, but basically, as long as you’re in the System, if you die, you get reformed. Every human that lives on this world is in the system. As a Portal Jumper, you’re not in the system, meaning that if you got cooked, you’d be permanently dead.”

“So, why the deception?” Sam asked. “Why not just turn off the grill or whatever?”

“Whatever happens must seem to be part of the show, no matter what,” the man said. “Being able to swap you out with a look-alike, that’s wearing a matching outfit, that is a lucky break. Undoubtedly, they will realize that what just happened was a rescue, but in the heat of the moment, it must seem to be part of the show.”

“So, how is that supposed to happen?” Sam asked.

“Luckily for you, Susan was supposed to be the Bacon Princess,” the man said, as a number of guys rushed out onto the metal, dressed in bacon, and brandishing wooden toothpicks as if they were swords. “Those are the Bacon Knights.”

Zhou used his spatula to duel the Bacon Knights, carefully disarming each of them, then flipping them onto the rice and egg mound, and adding more eggs and rice per Knight.

“Probably would have used them as a decoy for the actual rescue,” the man said. “A good rescue in this sort of place is all about misdirection. It’s like being a magician – never let the audience know that something is up, until it’s taken care of. That being said, if you’d showed up with a bunch of friends, we probably would have turned off the stovetop.”

“Um, what’s your name?” Sam asked.

“You can call me Lee,” the man said. “Yours?”

“Sam. Um, is it possible for me to go back home?” Sam asked.

“Not that I’m aware of,” said Lee. “I’ve spent twenty years trying to find a way back – haven’t found one. Still, I’ve made the best of it – partnered with Zhou’s father to make the Dragon’s Hibachi, and we’ve been fairly successful.” He looked at the others. “Get back to your positions. Still have to do the rest of the meal.”

Sam watched as the rest went to an elevator, and went to a spot behind Zhou, getting onto a tray, with dipping sauces, and other meats.

Lee then pressed his ear. “Everyone else is in position for the meal. All is good up here so far. Good Rescue.”

Zhou put on an exaggerated turn, glancing up at the hole in the ceiling, as if looking at Sam, before looking back down and picking up the tray of bacon-wrapped humans.

Sam watched with a horrid fascination as Zhou first flipped the meat onto the griddle, placed some cheese on top, then flipped the humans each onto their own section of meat. Zhou would then flip more cheese and meat on top.

She looked at Lee. “That cheese is going to stick to them, and possibly suffocate them.”

Lee nodded. “But their bodies won’t be overly burned, and the cheese will kill them quickly.” He looked at her. “On this world, the dragons rule. Humans, unless they live with a dragon, are really low on the food chain – everything else is bigger. Insofar as everything else is concerned, we might as well be mice, and treat us as such. The dragons figured out that humans were sapient long ago, and figured out how to reform humans after they died of things other than sickness or old age. I guess it’s because they liked our taste, but wanted to make sure that we’d still be around in the log run.”

“Okay, so, what’s going on down there?” Sam asked.

“Those dragons in suits are Judges for a Teppanyaki cooking competition,” said Lee. “If Zhou can wow them, he’s in. Otherwise, well, at least he can say that he tried. Top Prize is like, a hundred million American dollars, or thereabouts.”

A look came to Sam’s face. “I hope I didn’t cost him his chance.”

“He made the choice to place you on the rice,” said Lee. “If nothing else, his father will be proud of him for his choice, as am I. I didn’t have to tell him what to do – he just did it. Everything else, that just fell into place – your outfit looks similar to the bacon the others were wearing, Susan could pass for you enough to do a swap, and he’s good with the flipping things into the air. Also, this is the first rescue he’s pulled off without his father, or breaking character. That being said, I’m glad you didn’t scream – ruins the show, not that I’d blame you.”

“Um, by the way, got anything for burns?” Sam asked.

Lee took a look at Sam’s back. “On the plus side, it’s like one would rate a bad sunburn – that will hurt for a few days, unless you got eaten. Still, if you don’t want to get eaten, I got something for those kinds of burns.”

He walked over to a shelf, picked up a jar, and walked behind Sam. A moment later, Sam began to relax, as Lee began to rub something on her back. She sniffed the air. “Is that mint?”

“Helps with any pain you might have, smells nice, and tastes nice too,” said Lee.

“For whom?” Sam asked.

“The dragons of course,” said Lee. “Mint-flavored humans are like a candy to them. This bunch ordered some mint jellied humans, which is what I used.”

“You used mint jelly for a burn?” Sam asked.

“This stuff helps to reduce the worst effects of any heat for if you’re not on a bed of rice or meat, or whatever,” said Lee. “Most of the sauces and such do something like that. A light amount will take care of things until I can get what you really need.”

“So, what are you doing up here?” Sam asked.

“Conducting an orchestra, as it were,” said Lee. “Timing is everything. Food has to be readied in a timely manner, ingredients brought out, and everything else, all while the customers are focused on Zhou.”

It was then that Zhou started serving the customers, or rather judges, their portions. Each got a bowl of rice, with a bacon-wrapped human, then serving of meat, each with a cheese-covered bacon-wrapped human in them. Even then, as Zhou served them, he put on a show, flipping the meat onto the plates, and juggling the bowls of rice, using his spatula. There was a nod of approval, before the judges dug into their meals.

“A bit macabre for my tastes, knowing what those are made with, but I think he did a good job,” said Sam.

“Takes some getting used to, sometimes years,” said Lee. “I still wish to find a way home, and yet, I’ve made a place here for myself. If there was a way back and forth, I wouldn’t mind living here, if I could see my parents on the weekend, if they are still alive.”

“So, there’s no way back?” Sam asked.

“As far as I know,” said Lee, as he walked towards the elevator. “Come on.”

Sam followed. “Where are we going?”

“Well, to listen to what the judges thought of Zhou’s performance,” said Lee. “And you might want to thank Zhou himself for saving you.”

“I suppose that would be the polite thing to do,” said Sam.

“Polite word of warning, Zhou can’t talk,” said Lee. “He was born mute. But, he does use sign language, American Sign Language to be specific, and I understand and speak it, and I translate for those that don’t. He understands English though – he’ll understand you, no problems there.”

“Useful to know,” said Sam.

“Most pick up on the basics after a while,” said Lee, as they appeared behind Zhou. “Now, don’t talk for a bit, unless asked. I must speak for Zhou.”

Zhou turned, looked at them, specifically Sam, and made motions with his hands, and fingers.

“He wants to know if you are okay,” said Lee.

“I am,” said Sam. “Thanks to you, I guess.”

Zhou smiled, and laid out his hands.

“He wants to carry you over to the Judges,” said Lee. He offered his hand. “It will be alright.”

Sam accepted, and followed after him, onto Zhou’s hands. A second later, they were on a cool section of the griddle, which hadn’t been heated.

“Ah, the coordinator,” the one judge said. “What do you think of your chef’s performance?”

Sam had to admit, looking up at something sixty or more feet tall was scary, even if they were just sitting down.

“I believe he performed well under the situation,” said Lee. “If I was looking for someone to hire, I’d at least give him a chance.”

“Yes, other than a slight amount of nervousness, they did pretty well, not only in preparing and cooking the meal, not to mention the performance, but also in the rescue,” said the judge. He looked at Zhou. “Your father would be proud of you. Not many can pull off a rescue that isn’t obvious, but you put their safety first, even if it cost you your chance to enter the competition.”

Zhou gave a bow. He then made some motions with his hands and fingers.

“Chef Zhou would like to know when you plan to let him know your decision,” Lee said.

“We’ll let him know in forty-eight hours,” the judge said. They then looked at Sam. “I hope that you can enjoy your life here, and I hope you’ll accept our apologies for any inconveniences your portal jump has cost you.”

“That’s a pretty big apology,” said Sam.

“It’s something scientists have been working on, as we would like to share our technology with your people,” the judge said. “For what it’s worth, enjoy your life here.” The judge looked at Zhou, and began making motions with his fingers and hands.

Zhou seemed to be surprised, only to reply back with his fingers and hands.

The judge nodded, and responded with his fingers and hands.

“Well, this is surprisingly useful to know,” Lee said quietly. “Seems that the judge knows ASL, due to having a brother that’s hearing impaired. He has also complimented Zhou on his technique, and his cooking.”

The judge looked at Lee. “Even if he’s not allowed to compete, as I’m not the only one making the decisions, I might have to come back, with my brother. He likes to talk with those who can understand and talk with him.”

“Thank you,” said Lee.

With that, each of the judges picked up a mint jellied human, popped them into their mouths, and swallowed. They then stood up, and walked out.

“Alright,” said Lee. “Let’s get the machine running.”

Zhou pressed a button, and the humans that had been eaten over the course of the meal appeared on the table.

“The Mint Jellied Ones will be along in about thirty minutes or so,” Lee said, as he looked at Sam. “It takes a little while, as it were.”

“I think that I understand,” said Sam. “So, what do we do now?”

Lee chuckled. “Simply to welcome you to Dragon’s Hibachi. We hope that you enjoy your stay here.”