So playing the trombone wasn't getting me in enough trouble? |
Only my right opened when Pubby hopped into my room yelling. "Field Trip, get up, get we're all going on a field trip!" "Pubby, what the hell, what time is— "It's time to get up, hurry Richard, and we don't wanna miss the bus. Andre is driving." Which proved that, yes indeed, things could be worse than having a sugar-addled bunny jumping around your bedroom. I pulled on a pair of shorts and a tee and found my flip-flops. Luckily, Anon-Y-Monkey had made coffee the night before on a timer. He and Grumpy were still sleeping off last night's bender on the couches. "Are you going to wake them up also, Pubby?" "Nope, no time, we're late, we're late ... for a critically important date!" He cracked himself up, not realizing that he hadn't gotten the quote correct. "So, who is going on this field trip?" Pubby thought about it for a while before he answered. "Ummm, all the bloggers are coming and all their muses—" "All their muses, so why aren't we waking up those two sleeping beauties, and where's the turtle? A Guavé Tortuga has a rehearsal, he can't come, and we don't need those other two. Just me and you today ol' buddy, ol' pal." "Pubby?" "Yes?" He was trying to sound innocent. "Is Sha-sha coming on the trip?" "Maaaybeee." Being coy, the insides of each floppy ear turned a bit pink. I went to the frig and got two of the spray bottle I keep loaded. Just the thing, a quick spritz of ice water usually calms him down. Thinking about his latest infatuation, I grab the third icy cold spritzer. We headed off to the other side of the isle, and sure enough, there was Andre. He was kicking the tires on an old yellow school bus. The smell of diesel was heavy in the air. A few of the other bloggers and their muses were already there, everybody looked nervous. Not sure if it was about the trip or the fact that Andre was driving. I let Pubby pick out our seats, naturally, he took two seats right across from Marcus and Sha-sha. I whispered, "behave" and waved the spray bottle at him. He stuck his tongue out at me a struck up a conversation with Marcus. Smooth that bunny is. With a grind of gears, I don't think Andre can reach the clutch peddle, and with a black belch of smoke the bus roared off on our adventurous field trip. Well, I thought. "It can't be worse than that basement can it?" The teacher in me did a quick headcount, just a habit. Besides Marcus and Sha-sha there was Apondia and her muse, Pumpkin Spice Sox and Daisey. Sitting at the back of the bus, as far away from Andre as she could get, sat QueenNormaJean maybesnow?! with her muse. Dave and Clio, the newest arrivals were sitting up front, helping Andre watch the road. Brother Nature sat behind Andre with a map out, every once in a while Andre flipped Brother Nature the bird. LeJenD' and Ravyn were sitting in the middle, giggling about something. Pubby leaned closer and whispered, "I think they're giggling at you." "Yeah." I snorted. "Because it's every day you see a talking bunny with floppy ears." Pubby shrugged. "Well, you're talking to a bunny with floppy ears." I gave him a squirt of ice water. We were doing about 600 MPH when Andre stood on the brakes, whipped the wheel to the left, and spun into the parking lot of a large white building. The building had a large sign, and once the dust cleared we were able to read it; "The Haemingway Center For Muse Rehabilitation" Everyone was talking at once; Mostly a lot of, "Why are we here", and "This better not be what I think it is", from the Muses. Pubby looked at me accusingly, "Are you dumping me?" I sprayed him again. Andre popped the top on a beer, put his little furry feet up on the steering wheel, and growled something at Brother Nature. "Andre says, everyone out of the pool, errr, bus. Our tour's about to start." We trooped towards the entrance, as well as a ragtag ensemble of Muses and authors could troop. We were met by a man dressed like a riverboat captain, he greeted us in a rich southern drawl. Now, Folks, it's mighty fine to see ya'll, there're a lot of fine folks just bustin' ta meet ya'll. Step this way, step this way." Pubby nearly tripped over his ears trying to catch up to Sha-sha. I sprayed him again. We went to a room filled with muses, all of them authorless. Sadly some of their authors had passed on. Even sadder, some of their authors had just given up, abandoning their muse, not writing any longer. All of the authors were sad about that and talking it over we each decided to adopt an orphan muse. "Hey, it sounded like a good idea at the time." There were still muses left so we decided to adopt and gift muses to our favorite authors at Writing.com. I found a raven, it talked but had a very limited vocabulary. I decided he make a great muse for blimprider, maybe the skipper could teach it to say something besides "nevermore". A muse named Thalia approached me and asked for help, I quickly had adoptions papers drawn up for Sum1's In Schaumburg and Lornda. Who better to take care of comedies muse? I found a little muse to adopt, it doesn't even have a name yet. When I get back to "Invalid Item" , we'll all have to do something about that! Keep a lookout! |