The Banana Blog |
1. It’s late at night, and you hear footsteps in the bar—but you’re definitely alone . . . or so you thought. Last night I stopped by Andre’s Banana Bar. He said he’d meet me after hours. Since I had to be up late to meet a writing deadline, I told him, sure! I’ll meet you after the regulars get tossed out. At 2 AM I tried the back door since Andre mentioned it would be unlocked. I walked into the back room of the Banana Bar. Gracious sake, what a mess. I had to make my way around cases of liquor, beer kegs, garbage cans, paper products, food on the floor, and, what’s this? In the center of the back room in a stainless steel washtub sits a tree that reaches the ceiling. I made my way through all that junk to find a banana tree. Hanging from the top branches were bunches of green bananas, along with Andre and two other monkeys, all chittering and chattering. The monkeys threw bananas at me, but suddenly the monkeys went silent. They scampered down the tree and into the bowels of the crowded room. I heard footsteps coming from the front bar. But I just saw Andre, and he was barefoot. So who could this be? I grabbed whatever weapon I could find - a wet mop from the bucket in the corner. My heart pounded, my grip on the mop tightened. As I held the dripping mop in front of me like a saber, I thrust the mop into a face, causing something to stumble, then fall onto the sticky floor. “AArrrggghhh! Get out of here! I’m armed. Don’t make me hurt you more!” The mop handle hit the interloper on the head. “What in the world are you doing? Stop…” “I thought you were a robber or…” Lilli 🧿 ☕ grabbed the mop, then broke the handle. “I’m the boss here, working late as usual. Why are you here?” She turned on more lights. “Andre invited me.” “Yeah right. I’m calling the cops. Stay right here.” She marched back to the bar while I snuck out the back door. That’s the last time I set foot in that place. W/C 350 Queen NormaJean |