The Raven Part 4: Devil of the Falls

Epilogue

3 Days After Ravenfalls

Pam sat in the living room while Beth slept. Seventy-two hours they'd been back, and so far all her girlfriend had done was sleep, eat, and use the bathroom. She'd brought both her and Jake to their apartment to heal them before sending Jake on his way. She was glad that Beth wasn't fighting her on resting this time. The poor girl was exhausted, and after bathing her she'd fallen asleep in her arms. She needed to rest after everything she'd been through. There would be time to play later.

Pam was in the middle of meditating at the moment. She'd been researching a way of creating a portal or some sort of link to her psyche, but the required materials wouldn't be easy to come by. She'd need to spend some time scouring the city to find them, but for now she could use some of older teachings to tap into her mindscape. Clearing her mind wasn't easy after everything she and her friends had endured. She'd spent the better part of the last hour simply trying to find some kind of peace. Her breathing was even, and she closed her eyes to let herself fall into the corners of her mind. The material world slowly faded around her as the minutes ticked by.

When she opened her eyes she was no longer in her and Beth's apartment. She was surrounded by an empty black void. She stood in the middle of the void, nothingness on all sides. A simple thought brought stone slaps soaring out of the abyss, and the began connecting together to form a pathway. One by one, they created solid ground beneath her feet. She formed a picture in her mind that slowly began shaping into a faux reality. A Gothic tower rose from the ground, statues representing her past and present appeared, and small twinkling violet lights shone throughout the area like glistening gemstones. The tower was her primary objective as it housed all of her knowledge of what was and what could be within, and so she slowly strode towards it. She passed by the statues of her past as she walked. They represented memories; her mother holding her tightly, her father poised to strike them both, her old tarot card table, Rebecca from their first meeting, Jake in his Birdboy attire, Dilatrix, Beth in her Catgirl suit, her Feral attire, and nude say for her collar, and so on the list went. Each figure reminded her of how far she'd come, how naive she had been, how much she had lost, how much she had gained, and what was at stake.

She walked through the gateway of the tower, and looked around the structure. There were multiple stories to the tower, but what she needed was all on the first floor. Shelves lined the walls with copious books resting on them. Everything she knew and everything she'd experienced was housed within them. A large circular table sat in the middle with various chairs around it. This was new to her, but she recalled hearing both Dilatrix and Rebecca mention this form of magic before. She took a seat at the table and waited. A golden orb of light dropped down from the ceiling, and it hovered in front of her. It slowly began expanding and taking shape. A wispy, glowing image of herself formed in front of her that slowly took corporeal form. An exact copy of herself with golden eyes stood before her and pulled out a chair across from her.

"You realize that this is a form of talking to yourself, right?" the golden eyed duplicate asked.

She rolled her eyes and replied, "I am well aware, but I was told that this form of magic is a good way to rationalize and resolve dilemmas. Am I wrong?"

"Considering I'm the embodiment of your knowledge and wisdom, I think you already know my answer," Wisdom replied.

"I didn't think the projection of my knowledge and emotions would be quite this snarky," Pam said.

"Though I and the others may be fragments of you, we are still inherently you," Wisdom replied, "If you find it displeasing then I suggest you try being less sardonic."

"Oh go to hell," Pam spat.

"Conversing with one's self and arguing are two different things, Pamela," Wisdom said, "Let's not get off track."

Pam sighed and bit her tongue. She'd forgotten what it was like to deal with an alpha personality for counsel. "You know why I'm here," she finally said.

"You've come for a few reasons," Wisdom said, "You're curious about the abilities you've begun to tap into, and you want to know if you've made the right decision with Rebecca."

"Yes," Pam said, "I need to know what is happening to me. What am I?"

"You are you, nothing more and nothing less," Wisdom answered, "A young woman born with a talent for manipulating arcane energies and tapping into the weave, but you're referring to your conversation with Jason. What he said is true. You were taught by Rebecca that your emotions were a weakness, but in your case that isn't true. You, we, draw strength from stronger ties to our emotions, to each other. You believed that your attachment to Beth made you weaker, but that was merely because you tried to suppress those feelings. Through giving into them while on the brink of death, you released the power that you had confined within yourself."

"And the transformation?" Pam asked, "What was that?"

"Based on our studies in the castle library, and in Dilatrix's scrolls I think it's safe to say that it may very well be the beginning of an archon ascension," Wisdom replied, "Mastery of this form will take time, dedication, and will require you to be free from distractions."

"Are you referring to Beth and Jake?" Pam asked with a hint of agitation in her voice.

"Not at all," Wisdom replied, "Honestly, do you not listen, or are you just this thick? If so, what does that say about me?"

Pam clenched her fist and took a deep breath before speaking, "Get. To. The. Point. What distractions are you referring to?"

"I suppose we can revisit the question later," Wisdom said, "The distractions that come from your second guessing, your regrets, and the woman you've been silently serving despite your denial."

"Do not dare insinuate that she has any control over me," Pam said.

"You would deny it?" Wisdom asked, "You forget, Pamela, we are one in the same. You had the opportunity to destroy her grimoire, and yet you let Jake take it without batting an eye. You may not have delivered it to her, but you knew that he would give it to her. Maintain your denial all you want, but deep down you know that you played a hand in giving her her powers back."

"She would have found another way," Pam said, looking away, "She always finds a way to get what she wants."

"But you helped her, again Pamela," Wisdom said, "You know the implications of helping her, and you didn't even follow through with your justification. Beth is going to be both hurt and betrayed when she finds out."

"So you think I've made a mistake," Pam said.

"If you've come here for comfort and lies, then you've come to the wrong place," Wisdom said, "I am an extension of yourself, and I am not going to pretend that you've made a good decision. Deep down you know that you've made a mistake. Both aiding Rebecca and lying to Beth. Neither myself or any of the other facets of yourself approve of your decision, but we understand why you did it. The talons of that woman run deep into all of our minds. We all remember what it was like being beneath her, what we used to do, and much as we deny it how much part of us enjoyed it. Years upon years of serving her have cause an imprint in our minds that none of us are proud of."

Pam was silent for a moment before she finally asked, "So what am I supposed to do?"

"We do what we have always done: survive," Wisdom said.

"I will not go back to serving her," Pam said adamantly.

"That is not what I'm proposing," Wisdom replied, "The truth is going to come out, and when it does Beth is going to be extremely unhappy. We both know how she is; hot headed, passionate, and slightly irrational when it comes to Rebecca. If ever there were a more trying circumstance for a relationship, I cannot fathom what it would be. Be there for her, confide in her, protect and prepare her, but do not give up on her."

Pam was about to reply when a crimson orb floated down before taking her form. Ruby eyes stared at her with outrage and contempt, "How could you even think that restoring that bitch was a good idea?!" the red eyed duplicate demanded, "You've jeopardized everything that we've worked, everything we have, and for what?! Some bullshit tie to a fallen Goddess?!"

Pam blinked at the clone before her, but Wisdom spoke up, "Rage, I don't recall you being summoned."

"Fuck off brainiac," Rage snapped before turning back to Pam, "Why would you do this?! Beth is the one good thing that we have in this world, your idiocy is going to drive her away!"

"We don't know that, Rage," Wisdom said, "She loves us as much as we love her. All we have to do is allow her to process everything."

"The last time we served that bitch Beth slit our throat!" Rage snapped, "Do you really think that this time will be different?!"

"Enough!" Pam snapped, growing tired of the debate within her head, "I did not come here for a lecture or to be berated. I came here for answers, and I have gotten them. I will keep her safe even if she hates me for what I've done. Do not pretend to be above Rebecca's influence. If what Wisdom has said is true and if you're as keen on Beth as you say, then all of us have to be united to protect her. Can we all agree that keeping her safe is the most important thing?"

Wisdom nodded, "I couldn't agree more."

Rage huffed and crossed her arms before looking away, "Of course I agree with that!"

"Good," Pam said as she stood from her seat, "I think I've been here long enough. I should go check on her. We'll speak again soon."

"This place will remain here in the meantime," Wisdom said, "The other parts of yourself will continue to take form, and I expect that you'll have more than just Rage and I to deal with when you return."

"Great," Pam said flatly, "Because this has been such a wonderful experience. Can't wait to hear what sort of niceties the rest of you have for me."

"Bitch," Rage breathed, "Get out of here."

"Until next time, Pamela," Wisdom said, "I'll see what I can find in our memories regarding this new transformation in the meantime, and Rage will try to find new ways of protecting Beth."

"Goddamn right I will," Rage said, "Stop fucking lying to her until then."

"Give me time," Pam replied, "It isn't easy to admit this sort of thing to her. I haven't had someone I care about like this in...well ever."

"Stop stalling," Rage seethed, "Go. Do not push her further away before we speak again."

5 Days After Ravenfalls
Jake sat in the study reading over the documents that Pam had gotten her hands on from Ravenfalls. To say he was troubled would have been an understatement. He'd yet to present the book to Rebecca, and so far she hadn't pressed him for it. She had been relieved when he had walked through the door to their apartment, and she'd insisted that he spend the first few days in bed. He knew, however, that it wouldn't be long before she began asking about it, but right now he had bigger concerns. Emily Brunswick, or Voidfoot as she had come to be known, had somehow had a hand in Abigail's powers and the destruction she'd wrought on Ravenfalls. She was supposed to be dead. He and Beth had barely survived their last encounter with the crazed woman, and the idea of facing off against again filled him with dread.

After Emily's descent into power and madness, her company had gone under. Blackridge Inc. had absorbed what was left of Emily's company at the time. It was supposed to be the end of an era and the start of a new one for his own company. They'd made incredible strides and advancements from the research done by Emily and her team, but several of their more questionable undertakings had been achieved in storage. He couldn't bring himself to get rid of it; there was too much risk of it falling into the wrong hands. He couldn't recall seeing anything on a Project S.T.A.T.I.C in any of the records, though. What was perhaps more concerning was the journal Pam had found. He had no idea who had left it, but whoever it was had to be close to Emily. From the notes, it looked like Emily was in fact alive and operating in the shadows. He wondered who this mystery person was, and just what their relationship was to Emily.

He'd been pouring over the documents for the last two hours, and so far he hadn't had any luck. He glanced over at the large leather-bound book that sat on the book shelf. Rebecca's grimoire sat there taunting him. He could faintly see wispy strands of light rolling off of the heavy book. "One crisis to another," he mumbled to himself, "What am I going to do?"

He asked the question half hoping that Ashley would appear with some words of encouragement, but since they'd left Ravenfalls he hadn't seen or heard from her. He'd come to terms with the idea of him losing his marbles, and truthfully he was okay with it. It was a small price to pay to have the idea of someone who cared about him so close. He heard Rebecca walking down the hall, and he spun on his stool to face the door. She ducked under the doorframe and walked into the room. She wore a long black regal gown, floral patterns stitched into the lace, and her hair was down. She wasn't wearing any makeup this evening and she was bare footed. She had a concerned look on her face, but there was an eager anticipation behind her eyes. If he hadn't known her for so long then he would have easily missed it. Tonight was the night she was going to ask and he knew it. He'd been dreading this conversation since they'd made it back.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

"Most of my injuries were taken care of by Pam, and the ones left behind are healing nicely," he replied.

"Pamela was one of my most trusted advisors and a talented healer," she said before quietly adding, "But those wounds weren't what I was referring to, Jake. I...I know what that harpie did to you and Elizabeth. Are you alright?"

He grimaced at her admission, "As well as someone who was forced to star in murder porn can be I guess."

"Snuff," she said.

"What?" he asked.

"I believe the technical term for what she was trying to shoot is snuff," she explained, "The horrors she put you two through were gut wrenching to watch, so I can only imagine how you feel having actually endured it."

"You saw the videos?" he asked before sighing when she nodded, "Goddamn that bitch. It's over now, and thanks to Pam she won't be a problem for anyone anymore. I'd say she didn't suffer enough, but what I saw Pam do was unlike anything I'd ever seen before…"

"What happened, exactly?" she asked, "I could feel the shockwave of power here, even without my powers. The news has been saying there was some sort of seismic activity, but I know magic when I feel it."

"Pam, she...she dismantled Abigail then brought her back together before doing it again and again," he said, "She pulled her apart piece by piece after turning into this...this being of pure energy or something. It was like a horror movie mixed with an anime. I don't know for sure, but I think she dragged her to hell or something. What I do know is that I could hear Abigail's screams right up until we stepped through the portal Pam created to get us home."

"Intedesting," she said, "Did she discover this through my tome?"

He had to admit, it was a clean segue. He hoped he was wrong, but he knew she was moving towards the mission's objective. "She never even opened the book," he admitted, "When we left...she said she didn't need it, said that her powers didn't come from words on pages, but that they came from Beth."

"Elizabeth?" she asked, "Hmm, that is curious, but then again Pamela's magic was always a bit different than my own. She had so much potential, but the strength of her spellcasting always seemed to spike with her moods. So if she didn't use my grimoire, what became of it?"

He glanced over to the bookshelf before sighing, "I brought it back with me."

"And here I thought that Pamela would have had you destroy it," Rebecca said before smiling and walking over to the shelf, "The two of you never really stopped serving me, did you?"

He looked away before replying, "Kind of hard not after everything you did to us."

"Don't pretend that you didn't enjoy it or that you don't miss it," she said playfully, "You forget that I know you both, and I could feel that joy whenever I played with you both. Deny it all you want, we both know that you miss our time together."

"We've still been together, Rebecca," he corrected, "We still have our fun, and yeah, I do enjoy the things we do together, but that doesn't mean I liked being completely under your thumb. I'm not a criminal, and if you could feel everything then you know how afraid I constantly was. I lived in fear the entire time I was at serving you, and you want to go back to that?"

She grabbed the book and ran her hand over the cover. It felt good to have something so familiar back in her hands. She looked over to him as she spoke, "Of course not, Jake, and you were only afraid because you were disobedient. You merely need to do as I say and you'll have nothing to fear. I told you a long time ago, I bring peace and order in a world that thrives in chaos. For a time, you saw this and believed it. Until Elizabeth showed up and poisoned your pretty little mind."

"Ruling with an iron fist isn't doing anybody any favors," he said, "You forced people to do your bidding, enslaved my city and your own, crippled my best friend, and turned on Pam. Beth didn't poison my mind, she was worried about me and wanted to make sure I was okay. You sent Pam after her, and then beat me within an inch of my life. I wasn't afraid because I disobeyed, I was afraid because you almost killed me after I agreed to serve you!"

"They tried to take you away from me!" Rebecca argued, "Elizabeth-"

"Beth was going to leave me be," he cut her off, "We talked, she wasn't happy with my choice, but she accepted it and was leaving. Even after sending Pam after her, she would have left us alone, but you just had to send her that damn video. That's what pushed her over the edge."

"Elizabeth needed to know the price of trying to steal you away from me, Jake," she said coldly, "I heard every detail of that conversation that night. She painted me as a common criminal, tried to dissuade you from listening to me, and tried to convince you that you were a fool!"

"You were a criminal, Rebecca," he corrected, "You used me for extortion and collecting protection money. Because of you, I had Dart turned into a broken woman for Aurora. Even with all of that, what did I say to Beth that night?"

"What?" she asked.

"You heard everything, so what did I tell Beth?" he clarified.

She looked away, realizing that he had her on a technicality, "You told her it was your choice, and that you believed you were serving a higher purpose," she said quietly.

"And yet that wasn't good enough for you," he said, gaining some volume and confidence, "Pam was supposed to kill her that night, she told me so herself, and then when that fell through you had to take it a step further. You beat me, cut, me, hell I'm still not sure if you didn't kill me that night! All of it just to send a painful message that warped Beth into an animal."

"She became what she always was: a Feral dog," Rebecca argued, "Besides, if it weren't for that then she and Pamela never would have found each other. Honestly, it worked out for both their benefit in the end."

"That's not the point!" he yelled, "You always have to be in control, and nothing is ever good enough for you! Beth could have killed you that night at the hotel, but she didn't because Pam thought you were necessary to help me. The truth, that even Pam denies, is that your damn claws are so far in her psyche that she couldn't let it happen. She spared your life partly because of everything you did to her, and partly because she saw you as a friend. You don't exactly have many people willing to call you that these days. You can have all the followers, slaves, and servants you want, but at the end of the day none of them are friends. What's your plan, Rebecca? What are you really going to do when you have all that power back?"

"I'll do what I must to ensure that you and I can always be together," she replied, "I won't let anyone or anything take you away from me again. If I'd have had my powers then none of you would have had to endure that hillbilly's sick games."

"We went through that shit and almost died just to get your powers back," he corrected, "All of this, Ashley and Abigail, has been for your own selfish gain. Doing all of this is pushing the few people you have left who actually give a shit about you away. I'll be damned if I go back to being a tool for you to use as you please."

"How can you say that?!" she demanded, "You were never just a tool for me to use and throw away. Jason, sure, but never you!"

"Bullshit," he said, "You used me to further your own wants and desires, same as Pam."

"I took her in when she had nowhere else to go, and I've spent lifetimes searching for you!" she argued, "Pamela was like a daughter to me, she was and is one of the few people in this world I can trust. Everything I've done, everyone I've cut down, has all been for you! I love you, Jake, and all I want is for us to be together."

She had stepped closer to him and set the book down. She tried to wrap her arms around him, but he slipped out of her grasp and stepped away. "Is all of this really worth it, Rebecca?" he asked, "You're pushing us away because you can't appreciate what you have."

"I've already told you, Jake, without my powers I may as well still be that frightened little girl from lifetimes ago," she replied, "I need them to be complete, to be whole again."

"Then what am I?" he asked, "If you need your powers to be complete then I guess neither me or Pam are worth much to you aside from being pawns."

"You are everything to me," she admitted, "You've been having to endure me without control, and I'm not blind to your suffering. I need them so that I can once again be in control."

"Because that is what it's always about, isn't it?" he asked.

"Why are you making such a big deal about this?" she asked.

"Because I am not going to be with someone who's trying to enslave the world, and Pam won't either this time around," he answered, "She's changed, Rebecca. Even if she turned a blind eye to help you, she'll side with Beth at the end of the day and so will I. I'm not going back to enforcing your warped desires."

She laughed, "You don't seriously expect me to believe that, do you?" she asked, "You'll do whatever I say, and so will Pamela. You threw everything away for Elizabeth once, and it nearly cost all of you your lives."

"You haven't gotten your powers back yet, Rebecca," he said darkly, "I can still stop you if that's what you're planning."

"You can, but you won't," she said smugly, "You said it yourself, Jake, I'm ingrained in both yours and Pamela's minds. For all your bluster and bravado, neither of you really forgot who your Goddess is. If you think that little whore Elizabeth can stand against me, then you're more broken than I originally thought."

"There's the cold hearted bitch that I know," he said coldly, moving to stand between her and the book, "We've changed and evolved, Rebecca. Everything that's happened, everything you put us through, has made us stronger. Pam's powers have grown, and I think a part of you is afraid of what she can do. I had to break my rule about killing when I dealt with Ashley, and Beth has only sharpened herself further."

Rebecca threw her head back and laughed, "Me, afraid?" she asked, "You truly are delusional. Pamela's power may have increased, but she's still no match for me at full strength. Elizabeth has been captured and beaten again and again, Jake. You claim she's gotten stronger, but if that were the case then tell me why she's been the victim as of late. As for you, you broke your rule because I made you. I am the source of your strength, as well as the strength of your little friends. Elizabeth would never have been strong enough if I hadn't given her that final push, Pamela only has her abilities because of me and because I allowed her to have Elizabeth, and I've single handedly made you into a stronger man. Face it, Jake, without me you would all be nothing. Pamela would be dead in a gutter, and you and Elizabeth would still just be running around playing dress up."

"Enough!" he yelled, "You say you're not afraid, but then tell me why your hand is trembling. Tell me why your knees are shaking. It's because you know that no matter what the reason is, the three of us are more than you can handle now. Take the credit for it if you want, but deep down you know that we've grown into something you can't contain. What's more, you know that if it comes down to it you'll be alone again."

She let out a disgruntled hmph and crossed her arms. They stared each other down for a few minutes, neither giving the other an inch before she finally spoke, "Your detective skills have always been something I've admired. There aren't many people who can read me the way that you do. I'm not afraid of any of you, but it is true that I don't want to be alone. I've fought too hard to get you to lose you, so I'll make you a little deal. Let me have my book, and I give you my word that I will do my best to be a force for good."

"That is the biggest lie I've ever heard you tell," he said bitterly, "All you know is control and domination."

"I have never lied to you, Jake," she said, "What fun is there in life without a little mayhem? Still, I see your point. Stay with me, and show me how to be good then. It's part of your precious little hero code, isn't it? Helping and trying to reform people."

"You really expect me to believe that you're going to change?" he asked.

"You don't want to believe me?" she fired back.

"Of course I do," he admitted, "But after everything you've done, how can I?"

"Do you believe me when I say that I love you?" she asked.

He was silent for a minute before answering honestly, "Sometimes, but there are times it feels like you're using me."

She slowly walked over and took his hand in hers, "Jake, everything I've told you about my past is true. I've searched for you again and again only to have fate get in the way. I love you with all my heart and soul. I know it may not always seem like it, but please trust me when I say it."

He looked down before sighing and saying, "Let's say I do believe you, what then?"

"Then believe me when I say that if it means keeping you with me that I want to change," she answered, "I don't want to lose you, not again."

"Goddamnit," he said, "If you try anything, anything at all, I will put you down myself, Rebecca."

"That's adorable," she joked, "Admirable, but adorable nonetheless."

"I'm serious, Rebecca," he said adamantly, "So help me, if you try anything then Beth won't get the chance to go after you."

"Oh I believe you want to mean that," she said, "But you have my word that I will try my hardest to stay on the right side of your law. I'm curious as to how you're going to break the news to Elizabeth, and just what you're going to do to keep her from coming after me. You know that she won't be fond of the idea of me having my abilities back."

He sighed again knowing she was right, "You're right, she isn't going to be happy about it. I can't stop her from coming after you, but if you keep your word I can try to protect you."

She smiled at him, "All I can do is try, right love?" she asked.

"This doesn't feel right," he said.

"Trust me, my Raven," she said before extending her hand, "Now, give me my tome."

He knew it was a mistake, and deep down he knew that she would probably break her vow. In spite of knowing this, he reached behind him and grabbed the heavy book. He looked at it for a moment before holding it out to her. He pulled it back when she reached for it, "Don't make me regret this," he said.

"I wouldn't dream of it, love," she replied and then accepted the book when he held it out, "There's a good boy. My Raven has once again delivered unto his Goddess. Forgive me for making such a hasty egress, my love, but I have some much needed reading to catch up on."

He watched as she tucked the book under her arm and headed off to their room. He wondered aloud, "What have I done? Beth is going to kill me…"

2 Weeks After Ravenfalls

Pam had finally managed to get Beth to sleep. Her beloved Kitten had been having difficulty sleeping after the events of Ravenfalls. Pam hated seeing her pet so scared, but a part of her enjoyed the dependency that Beth showed. It was selfish of her, but she loved having Beth beg for her to stay in bed. Having a new collar had helped her, however. Pam had constructed an improved collar for Beth that allowed her to track her whereabouts with ease. A vibrant opal that she'd enchanted and warded much heavier than her previous collar. She'd etched into the stone both their initials and a heart surrounding them. Somewhat childish, but Beth had found it unbelievably sweet. She could feel the sense of comfort that Beth felt from the collar, and the warmth that came from it provided a slight comfort to her as well.

She'd also presented her with the gifts Jason had given her, but she'd refrained from mentioning who they were from. Beth had been ecstatic about having two new toys to utilize in the field. Pam had also decided to invest in a reloading bench for Beth and alchemy lab for herself. Deep down she knew she was doing these things to prepare her pet for the inevitable storm that would come when Rebecca regained her powers. Part of her hoped that Jake would destroy the book, but she knew that Rebecca's control ran just as deep if not deeper in him as it did her. The fact was, Rebecca would return to her former self, and when that happened they needed to be ready. Her mindscape clones all agreed that it was only a matter of time, so she'd taken to helping Beth create ammunition that was infused with unique alchemical ingredients. Beth hadn't questioned it, and had taken to the idea like a fish to water.

She was currently working on a new bullet for Beth that could break through magical barriers. It was tricky, but it was something that Beth would need in the future. Once she had the formula perfected, she would begin teaching Beth how to utilize it. She was impressed with how receptive Beth was with learning alchemy. She'd expected her to have difficulty with it, but she showed an aptitude for it that was almost shocking. She hadn't heard much from Jake since their return home, and she was beginning to get worried. He'd become like a brother to her, and while she was younger than him she felt it was her responsibility to protect him the same as she did Beth. Maybe that, along with the guilt she felt over not destroying the grimoire, was why she spent so many nights at the workbenches.

A knock at the door startled her and caused her to spill the contents of her latest vial, "Damnit," she cursed as she walked to the door, "Jake you could have called first."

She opened the door as she was talking and her face paled. Rebecca stood in the doorway wearing a regal gown and her old boots. Even without trying, she could feel a familiar power rolling off of her. She grinned at Pam before speaking, "Expecting my beloved at such an odd hour, Pamela, what should I think of that?"

"R-Rebecca," was all she could get out.

"Come now, Pamela, I'd have thought you'd be happier to see your Goddess than this," she said as her grin grew and ordered, "Invite me in."

"C-come in, please," Pam said involuntarily.

"That's more like it," Rebecca said as she walked into their home, "I see you've kept up your training and conditioning with Elizabeth. I almost expected to see a mess, but then again you always were dedicated with your slaves, Pamela."

Hearing Rebecca belittle Beth snapped her out of her stupor, "She isn't a slave, Rebecca, she's my girlfriend," she corrected.

Rebecca waved her off as she examined the living room, "Call her what you will, but a slave is still just that, Pamela," she said, "Decided to resume your alchemy training I see. No doubt trying to find a way to alleviate Elizabeth's ridiculous nightmares."

"Nightmares that you caused," Pam said, "Between what you did to her at the castle and what she went through with Abigail, it's a wonder she can sleep at all. I resumed my practices to teach Beth something new."

Rebecca stifled a laugh at that, "Elizabeth, learning something new?" she asked, "I'd forgotten how clever your sense of humor is, Pamela. That girl wouldn't know the difference between a bayleaf and devil's root."

"Do not come into my home and insult my beloved, Rebecca," Pam warned, "She's always been more capable than you give her credit for. Why are you here, Rebecca?"

"To thank you, of course," she said as though it were obvious, "If it weren't for you, and that impressive display of power, I wouldn't have my grimoire and I would have lost my Raven."

"I didn't do it to help you," Pam spat, "They needed me, and I promised them I'd keep them safe."

"And that worked out so well," Rebecca said, "The videos online were proof of your success there."

Pam's aura flared at her insult, and Rebecca was mildly impressed by the display. "They were only in that predicament because of your selfish desire to exploit us for your own personal gains!" she yelled before calming herself down, "I saved them, and I walked out of that hell with new abilities. Do not think that you can push me around anymore, Rebecca."

"And yet here I sit in your quaint little domestic home," Rebecca countered, "I heard about your little display, and I confess that I am proud of your accomplishments. You always did show more promise than many of the girls I took in, but do not presume to threaten me, Pamela. You're out of your depth, girl. You may have learned some new tricks, but I still hold all the keys to that pretty little head of yours. Does Elizabeth know that you willingly aided Jake in restoring me?"

Pam went silent and looked away, "Stop it," she muttered.

"That's what I thought," Rebecca said, "For all your bravado, you're still the same frightened little urchin I saved years ago. I am your Goddess, Pamela, and I always will be."

"I said stop it," Pam said with more confidence.

"What do you think she'll do when she finds out that you still serve me?" Rebecca asked, continuing her mental torture, "Will she be angry, or will she cast you out like so many before you?"

"Don't," Pam said, her voice cracking slightly.

"You'll be alone, again, as you always were," Rebecca said, "But don't worry, dear, there will always be a place by my side and at my feet. I know how much you delighted in worshiping me. Your gay little heart used to swell, and that little pussy of yours used to drip. Do you remember how much you used to beg me to worship my feet? Does Elizabeth know that she isn't your first love?"

Pam swung and her fist collided with Rebecca's cheek. Unsurprisingly, the amazon barely flinched. "Get out," she said, "Get out of our home, and get out of my life. I won't let you destroy everything that I've built with her."

"But, Pamela, I haven't destroyed anything," Rebecca said before leaning closer to her, "You did that all on your own. When she inevitably runs from you, I'll be waiting. Until then, accept these as a little thank you from me to you. I'll be seeing you, Pamela, and don't worry, you can earn your place back by my side. After all, what sort of Goddess would I be if I weren't merciful?"

Rebecca laughed as she stood and dropped a ziplock baggie on the couch. She walked out of the room with Pam glaring at her the entire way. It was when the door shut and she was sure she was gone that Pam broke. She began hyperventilating, and it got worse when she examined the baggie on the couch. Inside was a familiar and horrifying sight: Rebecca's old socks that she herself had cleaned with her mouth long ago. She threw them against the wall, and they fell behind the alchemy station. She fell to her knees, and wrapped her arms around herself. She lost all composure and began crying. She sobbed and her body shook with every breath she took. All she could think about was what was going to happen, and what Beth would do when she found out what she had done. She didn't want to lose her, not again.

She didn't hear Beth come into the room, and she barely registered her voice, "Pam? Pam, what's wrong?"

She couldn't bring herself to speak. She rocked back and forth while her sobs grew harder. She felt Beth wrap her arms around her, and she latched onto the smaller girl. She held onto her arms as though they were the only thing keeping her alive, and in some way they were just that. She could feel her heart beating along with her warmth. She tried to form a sentence to respond, "I...I...B-B-Beth...p-please...p-p-please."

Beth didn't know what was going on, but she'd never seen Pam like this. All she knew was that Pam needed her right now. She held her close and tried to gently calm her down the way she'd done for her so many times. She ran her fingers through Pam's long blonde hair and cooed, "Shh, it's alright. I'm here. Talk to me, hon, breathe and try to talk to me."

Pam felt unbelievably powerless and weak. She hadn't felt this weak in years. It was embarrassing, but she tried to do as she was told. Her breathing came out ragged and if did nothing to stop her sobs. She tried to form another sentence, "B...Beth...I...I...I'm…"

"Hey, it's okay," Beth said before gently lifting her girlfriend up, "Come on, let's go lay down, yeah?"

She nodded and let herself be picked up. She planted her face in Beth's chest and continued to cry. How would she get by if Beth left her? Why didn't she do what Jason advised? Why was she letting Rebecca get in her head again? These were all questions that swirled around her head, and every one of them made her feel worse. She didn't need to enter into her mindscape to know that for once all of her emotions were aligned and in agreement. She hated herself for what she'd done almost as much as she hated the idea that Rebecca might be right. She felt herself get set down on the bed, and was vaguely aware of Beth removing her clothes. She felt the familiar weight and comfort of Beth's body cause the bed to slightly dip. She didn't resist the welcome touch of her beloved, but it was somehow bittersweet. What was she going to do if Beth left her?

Beth wasn't quite used to this feeling. As long as they had been together, she'd never been the one to comfort Pam. It wasn't a bad feeling, just different. If she weren't so worried about it then she might have even enjoyed it. She replicated what Pam had done for her so many times, and ran her fingers through her hair and her other hand along the small of her back. "It's okay, hon, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere," Beth said, "Shh, just relax and I'll be right here if you wake up."

How long would she be here for? How was she supposed to go back to her old life after all of this? She couldn't, she wouldn't go back to it if she could help it, but what was she supposed to do to stop it? She leaned into the soothing touch of her girlfriend and let her gentle words slowly relax her. Her tears continued to fall until she had none left. Her body continued to quake with sobs until she was exhausted. For the first time since her mother had died, Pam cried herself to sleep. She never once released Beth, and she clung to her every time the girl readjusted herself. She was genuinely afraid of her leaving her, and she feared it would only be a matter of time. A single thought echoed in her mind as she finally drifted off to sleep.

"What have I done?"